WFH- partner came over unannounced

I think you mentioned that he also has (grown up?) children. I wonder why his previous relationship with their mother ended....

Hi OP, I'm sorry you didn't have a good night's sleep (understandable) and hope you have a better day. I think you're handling this brilliantly now you've recognised his behaviour for what it is - controlling. That's why he wants to "talk" to you - he's lost control of you and he wants to try to get it back. I'm so glad you know you don't have to speak to him and you're insisting you won't - there's nothing to talk about - a partner should just love you, not control you, and he will never learn this. He'll do what all controlling men do when given a second chance - behave themselves for a few days and then revert to type. It's clear from your posts you really understand this and I'm so glad you do. 😊
Have a lovely day OP. I hope he hasn't come round early today and that when.you get back from your coffee his box of stuff has gone (and if not, do as a pp has suggested, dump it on his doorstep unannounced!) 🤗

I’d have binned him off just for that nonsense, let alone all the controlling jealousy shit he’s pulled - knowing your location, randomly popping in (more likely to check you were where your phone was and that you wasn’t entertaining another bloke!)

It was the last straw, not an isolated event.

This would give me the ick! Would feel like dating a 12 year old 🤢

Check with 101 for advice and ask them to put a mark on your number and address.
Give his name and tell them you are nervous having broken up with a controlling jealous man.

THEN you can text him if he contacts you again and let him know that you have sought advice from the police about him and have a mark on your house.

Little bullying pricks like him absolutely hate any police involvement.
Their egos can't stand it.
Other men in authority having control.

Well done Op for ending it and taking the steps that you have to distance yourself.
Enjoy your meet-up with your friends.

Suuuuure he didn’t know you were in the middle of a work call. If you weren’t WFH, would he burst into your meeting room at the office and put on the same “show”? He has absolutely no respect that WFH is WORKING and should be given the same respect as if you were on the office. Dick. I’m glad he’s in your rear view mirror.

OP said it was the driver's door, so worse.

It's not just about illness. It's about a pattern of behaviours that women on here recognise that reek of entitlement and control. People in healthy relationships shouldn't be constantly on eggshells not trying to upset their partners. They shouldn't have to justify their social activities. They shouldn't have to explain that their job is important. If you don't get this then you need to educate yourself on how controlling people operate. Relationships should enhance your life not undermine it.

OP I really admire you. You are doing precisely the right thing. Him coming out and trying to open the passenger door was quite chilling to me.

Compare in what way? Do you mean that finance, accountancy and law are unnecessary non-jobs that could all end today with no ill effects on society?

What about creative jobs? I would imagine that most great art and literature was produced at home.

I think what you really mean is that you disagree with people working from home even if a job role can be carried out just as efficiently and effectively as working in an office.

As on most threads, your views are goady and downright odd and you seem to prefer to derail a thread rather than provide any help and support to the OP.

Taking the stuff to his house with a friend is a much better idea. It takes the control away from him and he then has no need to come to your house. Don't tell him in advance just turn up. Don't go into the house just leave on the doorstep

It's just amazing sometimes the utter shit they talk. He claimed he didn't know you were on a call but I'm assuming he didn't normally announce his arrival in a room by channeling scat man and a five year old boy.

Dear God. 😦🤣

Someone else asked about this- yes it was his idea. I didn’t have it on his.

Quelle surprise! 🙄

Omg the cringe is going to kill me!!!!!!!!! What a lucky escape, not a second too soon!

I'll admit I was wondering this too! The mind boggles.

He will try to work his way back in, make false promises....but you sound very strong OP
It's great you won't be there when he calls around. I would do exactly as you have described, go have coffee wirh your friends, leave his stuff in the box and change the locks.
Confide in your friendship group. You've done nothing wrong.

Okay, so now that this issue is just about resolved, would it be too much to ask what kind of noises he was making, exactly? I mean, are we talking pig noises or fart noises or what? I simply must know! 😂

You did loads for him but a lot of the comments here are ridiculous, people can be worried about their health without being in icu and do sometimes act irrational as a result. Mn jumping to leave the bastard because he acted like an idiot the way you described in your op makes me wonder how anyone stays with anyone!!!!!!

Take him off your find my phone location thing. You must do this . You aren't together. The relationship is over. He should never have had it anyway. Does he know any of your passwords? Email ?

Don't meet him. You don't have to. Ever!

Put his stuff in a box and ask a friend to go with you to do so- drop it at his house. Don't tell him you are going.

Send him one last text that says please stop contacting me. Your stuff is not at my house. If you persist, i will report to the police. Screenshot and block.

You don't owe him anything. Go and see your friends. Call the police if he turns up and Don't Let Him In.

Stay safe OP. I'm glad you have you ds there if he does come round unannounced. Putting his stuff on the doorstep and changing the locks sounds like a great idea. Hopefully he'll just collect and leave you alone.

You sound fantastic @Inchachaand you’ll get through this. Great boundaries.