WFH- partner came over unannounced

His behaviour is appalling, it's dismissive and rude. That you think he might use this to accuse you of being full of yourself and get cross at you is really telling.

Time to call it a day OP. You deserve better than to be made to feel small by this loser.

I think you’ve answered your own question OP.

as a sense check at the least his behaviour is seriously weird. Who just shows up during someone else’s working day and then pesters them on the phone?

At worst it is controlling and narcissistic.

At least you don’t live together! And no kids together and not married. So it’s a simple binning.

What an attention-seeking knobhead! Sorry OP but turning up and dicking about like that when you’re trying to work is something I’d forgive in an eight year old but not a grown man.

Did he need you to take him to A & E ?

He sounds like an immature wanker.

So don't call him. Why on earth should you be worrying about him being cross with you when he's behaved so appallingly to you. Find your anger! It's you who should be cross and he who should be sitting there worrying about whether he's upset you. He won't be, because your dynamic will be you pandering around him. Make it stop. Ignore him until he calls you and then tell him he owes you an apology. His illness does not give him the right to obstruct you earning your living.

Get rid of him. He is vile.

Thankyou! :-)

Lets not get sidetracked with a wfh debate I don't think it will help OP.

I understand why she stopped work and got him a cup of tea. These people get very nasty if they're not pandered to. It's been programmed in to serve them.

OP I'm glad you're beginning to see him more clearly.

Imagine if your 20 yr old ds was acting this way to a gf - would you be happy?

He is an idiot.

Have read your responses but skimmed thr thread a bit OP.

But had to say I'd be so annoyed if someone did this to me.

1. WHY cant he make his own tea?
2. He had no idea how important this meeting was or not. You say not too important but what if it had been
3. The stupid way he behaved was like a Year 5 kid.

That's the first lot.
"I know that when I call him in a minute he’ll say something along the lines of “as your partner I should take priority over work” or something like that and it will be the start of a reason to be cross with me."

So he's got form for finding reasons to be cross with you?

Then he takes off in a sulk and won't answer your texts which he knows will worry you. What an absolute performance.

What does he actually add to your life?
You've said that your job is really important for your and your DC's security. I would take a very serious look at anyone who thought it was OK to undermine that, interupt you, beg for attention and then make snide comments about "Your important job".. because yes... it is important.
Time to consider things.

The cleaning job was a different example that the OP referenced later in the thread. She was cleaning in a pub for extra money in addition to her main job, and her boyfriend wanted to go to work with her and kicked off when she said no.

The incident the thread is about was her main office job that she does from home.

I fucking hate it when men come in here and make misogynistic comments like this.

No it was a pub.

I'm sorry OP, it sounds shit.

My 9yo was unwell last week and off school. I had to go into work so my DH was at home with him. His work knew he was keeping an eye on the 9yo so it was all above board. But even so, my 9yo knew not to interrupt his dad unless he was feeling unwell and absolutely would have done so quietly. He certainly wouldn't have come in deliberately making noises or being distracting.

If a 9yo knows this, then your partner absolutely knows this too. He's 100% sabotaging you.

I get this. Family and friends turn up any time they please as I “work from home” and self employed. I still have deadlines to meet and unable to stop to make them a brew or listen to their woes. I always think to myself if I worked in an office would they turn up whenever they please, probably not! Health worries or not your work should be respected. As for making silly noises while on call, extremely disrespectful. How old he?!

It’s not necessarily important to the world but it is to me as it pays my mortgage and funds the life of my 3ds and I- 20/16/10.

I'd have said these exact words to him but added "where as you're only a boyfriend, one of which doesn't seem to respect that I have to do so in order to live and am not here to be at you're beck and call.

No they don’t in mine! Ffs. Is it a national day for idiots today or something?

But it does work for many.

The OP's adult children aren't tiptoeing around the house. They're just not disturbing her. My brother works from home.because he works for himself. He has an office and no one else goes in there. My son successfully works from home 60-80% of the time.

Posters in here have described how it works (successfully) in their houses. No one is tiptoeing around the place. Very few workplaces are silent. Many people have to deal with noise in their work environment.

It only doesn't work when you've got a dickhead about the place who deliberately interrupts. That's a dickhead issue not a WFH issue.

I'm confused so the OP was out on a cleaning job and the bf turned up at a clients home?

He is still jealous - of your job and probably of the independence your job allows you to enjoy. Don't move in with him. It's good that you decided to post, hopefully it helps you see what this looks like from the outside.

I agree, family members having to tip toe around their own homes it's ridiculous!! - I'm not excusing this dudes behaviour BTW.

That gives me

Pretend seizures
Pretend heart attacks
Pretend strokes

Otherwise known as 'when things aren't going my way, I dramatically collapse to the floor so that my girlfriend thinks I'm dying'

Throw in attempts to move in, the intention to start on you to chuck your colder children out to fend for themselves (bet that's in the pipeline) and the literally following you to work in the past and he's looking to get his claws into your house, your children out and you being his servant-prisoner.

This has so many 🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩