To think my kids grandparents are terrible

I can assure you it's not a generation issue! It's down to the individual person - their personality, outlook on life and own circumstances. I'm 50, and my Grandfather on my Dad's side was not involved in any of his grandchildren's lives, simply wasn't interested. On the other hand my Grandmother on my Mum's side doted on all her grandchildren. My husband's grandparents on both sides weren't interested. My FIL, isn't interested in his grandchildren, only on a superficial level. Whereas my parents are very involved with my son (he's their only grandchild as I'm an only child).

It’s not all Grandparents that I can say, my ex mil was brilliant until she was too ill to do it. My own Mum was a crappy mum and equally crappy grandparent.

It's really hard. My kids are a bit older and easier now and don't want anything to do with one set of grandparents. The grandparents keep asking to see them now and seem angry when we say we are too busy. I know they are looking at their friends who are very involved in their family's lives and they don't have that. They are a lot older now and quite alone. I don't feel bitter now (like I did when I really needed sleep and a bit of a break) I just feel sad for them.
The plus point is that I don't feel I owe them anything.
I hope you feel better soon.

Grandparent here I’ve got 7 and 5 year old with me today as it’s half term and mums at work ,every one of my friends who are grandparents help out .I still work only part time now .So it’s not all of us ,but I enjoy it.

This is a really big factor. If it’s childcare / babysitting you want then you’ll most likely struggle getting that from grandparents who are still working.

Most parents of adult children are still working and don't have lots of free time to babysit. My parents (my mum was at home) gave me lots of support raising my daughter, and my in-laws (both working) none at all. Guess who saw most of the child and had a part in her life?

Oh posted too soon
, my eldest is in their 30s so it's not a "new thing as such but it Is a shame that they didn't really want involved with their grandchildren,

Late Mil was fantastic she loved being involved and would have the kids at her house or take them out for the afternoon because she liked .spending time with them.

I agree grandparents (assuming they are able) should want to support their children. My parents had no support and they didn't support me. And same with pils. Sil and bil get a lot of support from bils parents tho.

I'm always envious of friends who have lots of support.

I hope to support my kids although I currently have a health condition that may impact.

Here we go again with yet another grand parent bashing thread. This generation as you so kindly refer to us all as, are no different from any other. There have always through out time been some grandparents who are more involved than others. It isn’t a generation thing at all. I could turn around and say the latest generation of parents are becoming far more entitled in expecting free childcare but that wouldn’t be fair. You are unreasonable for slating a whole generation. It’s a shame they don’t offer to help but that doesn’t mean they don’t love them.

My mum wasn't a great either she too had younger children and also worked so she didn't really get involved which is a shame,and in the midst of having young kids i felt annoyed, now I couldn't care less I just let it go it isn't worth your head space. Do you have other support kids friends parents that you could ask in an emergency like the dentist?

Yep, I feel you. Don't want to say too much as hard and outing but I feel you.

I try to feel sorry for them for what they're missing out on and vow to be a better grandparent myself if the time comes.