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To think that most “self-made” people had way more help than they admit?

86 replies

ArtfulTealCrab · 20/02/2025 21:25

Every successful person loves to talk about their “hard work” and “grit,” but they leave out the rich parents, private schools, and family connections. Is true self-made success even possible?

OP posts:
topsoils · 20/02/2025 21:38

Everyone I know who has done very well has done it to prove something and definitely didnt have family help. For example they were bullied at school for having free school dinners or incorrect uniform. They had the drive to succeed. Their kids on the other hand dont!

ArtfulTealCrab · 20/02/2025 21:37

CurtainsCurtain · 20/02/2025 21:31

I’m more interested in why you seem so invested in the idea that the self-made began with secret help. What difference would it make to you if people genuinely achieved success from nothing, with no educational or economic privileges, nepotism or connections?

Because narratives matter. If we pretend that success is purely about hard work when many people start with massive advantages, it misleads others into thinking they can achieve the same without similar help. Acknowledging privilege isn’t about dismissing effort; it’s about being honest about how opportunities are distributed.

OP posts:
Ilikepianos · 20/02/2025 21:34

Sometimes people don't realise they had help others didn't ie their parents were poor but scrimped and saved and paid for a lot. Sometimes politicians exaggerate.

But there are people who just did well from nothing - I know two very successful people from poor backgrounds who had no financial help.

Elsbels00 · 20/02/2025 21:33

Definitely in a lot of cases.

Just things like two loving parents, a safe and stable home, being wealthy or even comfortable, parents who care about your education, help towards starting a business or a house deposit, inheritance.

Not saying hard work doesn't come into it too.

But some people get a huge head start/leg up compared to others.

Shakeyourbaublesandsmile · 20/02/2025 21:33

Another thread about hard work…

Well some have help and some don’t - that’s life

DollydaydreamTheThird · 20/02/2025 21:32

This Reddit poster has obvs done their research on it. Apparently for America it's about 27% self made. I imagine it would be similar here.
https://www.reddit.com/r/FluentInFinance/comments/19180wa/no_dave_ramsey_8_out_of_10_80_millionaires_are/

CurtainsCurtain · 20/02/2025 21:31

I’m more interested in why you seem so invested in the idea that the self-made began with secret help. What difference would it make to you if people genuinely achieved success from nothing, with no educational or economic privileges, nepotism or connections?

BleachedJumper · 20/02/2025 21:31

I feel like life is a race, in which we all have a different starting line.

Being born in a wealthy western nation will put you ahead, your ethnicity or sex can put you ahead, your access to education, your family income/wealth, your location, athleticism, good looks etc. These things contribute to if your shooting gun is 100m from the finish line, rather than a 10k slog.

healthybychristmas · 20/02/2025 21:30

I have known a lot of people who have come from richer homes who don't have any drive or passion and who don't like working hard. They still tend to end up in good jobs.

I think those qualities are built into a person and when they are from a poor background they have a bigger impetus to succeed. I actually really love looking at people who have gone from rags to riches to try to work out what it is that made that happen.

Puttingoutfireswithgasoline · 20/02/2025 21:28

Absolutely.
I think genuine from nothing stories are very rare.
I don’t think people mean to mislead though. They just don’t realise the privilege they had.

GoldNewt · 20/02/2025 21:26

I image it is true for some, but not most.

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