Page 11 | Should I report my cousin's benefit fraud?

GreatAmberSnake · 2025-02-20T09:35:30+00:00

Hi everyone - I'm having a bit of a moral dilemma and looking to get everyone's opinions. My M34 cousin doesn't work, he claims PIP. I'm not that familiar with how it works but he says he's on the highest level available, and there's even talk of him getting given a car. He openly boasts at every opportunity about the extreme exaggerations and outright lies he put on his PIP application, and calls me and other members of the family idiots for working when we could just get our money from PIP like he does. If they investigated him they would easily find that some of his lies don't add up. I believe he genuinely does have depression and anxiety, but he has no physical issues. He said he put things like his partner needs to dress him in the morning (he split from his partner a couple of years ago), needs to wear velcro shoes as he can't tie laces etc. A home visit would show up some of his lies, and a call to the school (he's a weekend Dad but sometimes picks up/drops off his sons) or the Police (he's been arrested for drug offences a couple of times) would be further proof. The main thing stopping me from reporting him is his depression. He has attempted suicide on at least one occasion, and I fear that a potential prison sentence for fraud could send him into a spiral. Even if no-one found out it was me, I really don't want that on my conscience. If he didn't boast all the time I would just ignore it, it's not like it affects me directly, but it just winds me up every time he goes on about. Grrrr!! I do try to minimise contact with him but sometimes it's easier said than done. If he gets this car I think he'll become even more unbearable 😡 Help! What would you do?

Butterfly292828 · 21/02/2025 16:08

Teanbiscuits33 · 21/02/2025 00:43

What anyone spends money on has nothing to do with anybody but the person concerned, and even if I wanted to tell someone of my financial affairs, it wouldn’t be a judgemental person who clearly needs a life, like you.

A few of my friends claim PIP for valid reasons but are so scared that others in their circle will find out and judge them that they keep it quiet. Equally, I’ve known a few who like to rub it in people’s faces and exaggerate what they claim because they know certain saddos will foam at the mouth and it’s entertaining for them. Each to their own 🤣

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no you need to get a life!

Butterfly292828 · 21/02/2025 16:06

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AgnesX · 21/02/2025 16:03

Agix · 20/02/2025 09:57

Fed up of people saying PIP is difficult to claim. It's NOT.

It is only difficult to claim if you're not prepared to lie.You will be scrutinised and the assessors will try to catch you out when you're being honest, and often succeed in twisting your words and putting you off claiming because you're unwell and can't be dealing with this bullshit.

People who are prepared to lie and continue lying and fighting decisions that go against them will quite easily get PIP. Because they're happy to keep lying and scoring the points.

You do need medical evidence, but most medical evidence for mental health conditions is all about what you have reported to your doctor. Your doctor can only write down what you say your symptoms are. Your doctor doesn't live with you and has to believe you when you say you're so depressed you need help to get dressed. So that's what will go on your official reports and "medical evidence".

If you're prepared to lie, and make a part time job of claiming PIP by tracking which lies you have told your medical professionals and the PIP assessors, it is NOT hard to get PIP. You just need to learn the points system, and lie to your doctors and specialists and on the PIP form. These people also have people to lie for them, friends or family, pretending to have to provide care.

If you have genuine struggles, which you are genuinely trying to recover from and work towards getting better from, the PIP assessors will zero in on the bits where you seem capable and independent. You'll feel like shite spending so much time and energy on trying to claim this benefit and going through assesaments. You'll feel embarrassed and ashamed of how badly your health effects you, you'll struggle to talk about it. And you won't get PIP and will stop trying.

Not so with people who lie and make a job of it. They have all the time and energy in the world to keep going until they get the benefit.

The assessment process is easy for liars, who actually have the health to battle through the system, and very difficult for people genuinely unwell and trying to live life who don't have it in them to fight it.

Edited

How do you know this, out of curiosity. Have you gamed the system or do you work for DWP as a fraud investigator?

As much as I realise some people have no shame I'm surprised you say this.

Butterfly292828 · 21/02/2025 15:58

XenoBitch · 21/02/2025 00:13

I am confused. Are you on about two different people?
You mention someone who has been on DLA/PIP for 20 years despite not having a bipolar episode in that time....
And then go on about someone with bipolar who takes themselves off of DLA when they feel well.

If you are in hospital for more than 30 days, your PIP is stopped anyway. Maybe that is what is happening with this fictional person that is bipolar with no episodes, but also has them and comes off benefits.

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Yes two different people- just giving an example of my sister who was extremely ill with bipolar- certainly not fictional!

Butterfly292828 · 21/02/2025 15:55

Miley1967 · 21/02/2025 00:11

Age Uk often have people who will fill out the forms. they will often do home visits. Also citizens advice or sometimes even DWP home visiting officers will come to the home to help fill out the form. Or you can fill out the form online also.

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Oh thanks for that info, will pass it on.
forgot about Age Uk, they helped mum fill out POA forms for my father, they were excellent.
I think those forms would have me tied in knots. Anyway thanks 👍🏻

LakieLady · 21/02/2025 14:47

Butterfly292828 · 20/02/2025 23:16

Oh quite possibly switched over by now. I don’t understand the difference between DLA or pip. Anyway was a few years ago that they moved away, never said bye- so took that to being no longer on speaking terms.
is Attendance allowance something you go on after DLA or PIPS? A friend who 80 odd was turned down for AA.. she suffers breast cancer, lung cancer/ rheumatoid arthritis, COPD? Two knee replacements, 2 hip replacements & other ailments but was knocked back.
Her hands were frozen solid with the cold as she’s too scared to put the gas fire on.
is it worth her appealing?

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I don't work with clients over pension age, so have little knowledge of AA, I'm afraid. And she may be out of time for an appeal.

Age UK or Macmillan would be best placed to help your friend, they're specialists in benefits for older people and people with cancer, respectively.

LakieLady · 21/02/2025 14:38

Boomer55 · 20/02/2025 18:08

Some claimants in certain areas still haven’t been mass migrated over. 🤷‍♀️

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Thanks for that, I had no idea.

Mind you, several years ago, I had a client still getting incapacity benefit several years after every other client had been moved over to ESA, so I guess it's possible for some to slip through the net.

Jaehee · 21/02/2025 14:34

x2boys · 21/02/2025 14:31

When i was a mental health nurse I remember one patient was so depressed he was catatonic ,food was placed in front of him and he couldn't even pick up a knife and fork to feed himself ,If staff hadent spoon fed him he wouldn't eat
Another patient when in a depressive phase of her Bipolar couldn't get off the bed ,I went into her room regularly just to make sure she didn't dehydrate, that's not a choice.

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That’s what I have been like during the worst episodes. Catatonic and unable to put the food to my mouth or chew, not so much because I didn’t want to but more as if that part of my brain had shut down.

x2boys · 21/02/2025 14:31

ThisOldThang · 21/02/2025 12:37

I'd expect hunger to become a major motivating factor. Just like it is for everybody else.

People didn't used to starve to death simply because they couldn't be bothered to cook.

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When i was a mental health nurse I remember one patient was so depressed he was catatonic ,food was placed in front of him and he couldn't even pick up a knife and fork to feed himself ,If staff hadent spoon fed him he wouldn't eat
Another patient when in a depressive phase of her Bipolar couldn't get off the bed ,I went into her room regularly just to make sure she didn't dehydrate, that's not a choice.

bigkahunaburger · 21/02/2025 14:17

His shows just some of the added costs of being neurodiverse for example.

My friend for example lost her keys to her car and her house so much she was always having to get keys replaced and locksmiths ( v expensive) would lose money, bank cards, etc. get fines. Overdraft fees.

www.additudemag.com/adhd-tax-financial-wellness-money-problems/amp/

JLou08 · 21/02/2025 14:12

If your worried about his mental health and suicide then it's likely he isn't fit to work. He probably worries that not including physical symptoms in the application would lead to him not getting the money and he would struggle financially. I wouldn't report him.

scanni · 21/02/2025 14:08

@ThisOldThang

I'd expect hunger to become a major motivating factor. Just like it is for everybody else.

People didn't used to starve to death simply because they couldn't be bothered to cook.

You are absolutely correct, people didn't stave to death because they couldn't be bothered to cook

We are talking about severe mental illness though, not 'can't be bothered' - it's a shame you are unable to understand there is a difference, embarrassing really.

PandoraSox · 21/02/2025 14:06

@Jaehee I am so sorry you went through that. There are some very cruel and ignorant people on this thread.

Jaehee · 21/02/2025 14:02

ThisOldThang · 21/02/2025 12:37

I'd expect hunger to become a major motivating factor. Just like it is for everybody else.

People didn't used to starve to death simply because they couldn't be bothered to cook.

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I nearly died while suffering from an episode of severe depression because I couldn’t cook for myself. I was experiencing constant leg cramps, arrhythmia and muscle spasms because my electrolytes were so out of whack. I was so weak I couldn’t leave my bed and ended up being hospitalised. If I’d had something like pip at the time I would have hired a carer to help me.

It’s not a case of not being bothered. If a relative was bed bound with the flu would you say they couldn’t be bothered to cook for themselves? When I had glandular fever and was so ill that when I woke periodically, I had no idea whether hours had passed or days, would you say I couldn’t be bothered to get up and make dinner?

I would rather have glandular fever again than another episode of depression like that one. It was the illest I’ve ever been in my life. Your post is incredibly ignorant and clearly you have never been unfortunate enough to experience severe mental illness.

PandoraSox · 21/02/2025 12:49

ThisOldThang · 21/02/2025 12:37

I'd expect hunger to become a major motivating factor. Just like it is for everybody else.

People didn't used to starve to death simply because they couldn't be bothered to cook.

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There was a recent case where someone who had mental health problems (Errol Graham) did actually starve to death. In this case, it was because his benefits were stopped.

LadyKenya · 21/02/2025 12:42

ThisOldThang · 21/02/2025 12:37

I'd expect hunger to become a major motivating factor. Just like it is for everybody else.

People didn't used to starve to death simply because they couldn't be bothered to cook.

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You have never seen someone in a depressive crisis then I take it. Say no more!

LakieLady · 21/02/2025 12:41

ThisOldThang · 21/02/2025 12:36

What are the costs associated with the things you've listed?

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Paying for care/supervision to help someone do them safely. Clients often use their PIP to pay for a PA.

To be able to carry out an activity for PIP purposes means being able to do them safely, repeatedly, to an acceptable standard and in a reasonable amount of time.

x2boys · 21/02/2025 12:41

ThisOldThang · 21/02/2025 12:37

I'd expect hunger to become a major motivating factor. Just like it is for everybody else.

People didn't used to starve to death simply because they couldn't be bothered to cook.

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Clearly you have no idea and are coming across as very ignorant
And don't seem to want to understand 🙄

ThisOldThang · 21/02/2025 12:37

LadyKenya · 21/02/2025 12:31

Because you don't understand how these conditions could mean that a person suffering from them, would have extra expenses that they would not have if they did not have those conditions. One small example could be the reliance on ready meals, as some one suffering from depression, may not be motivated enough to cook a meal, but maybe could manage sticking a ready meal in the microwave.

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I'd expect hunger to become a major motivating factor. Just like it is for everybody else.

People didn't used to starve to death simply because they couldn't be bothered to cook.

LakieLady · 21/02/2025 12:37

Kneeboobs · 21/02/2025 00:39

Where does the £737 come from,I get standard pip and it's £290 a month.

Enhanced rate of both components is £184.30 pw, so £737.20 a month.

It's also pretty rare for mental health problems alone, and someone would have to have really significant issues with travelling to get enhanced mobility on mental health/ND grounds alone. I think I've had 2 clients get that award in over 7 years, and both of them were so unwell they literally could not walk down the street safely on their own.

ThisOldThang · 21/02/2025 12:36

LakieLady · 21/02/2025 12:29

I just don't see why things like ADHD or mental health results in extra money.

In which case, you probably don't realise how difficult life can be for people with ADHD or understand PIP regulations.

People with ADHD often can't cook safely, because they get distracted and wander off while things are on the hob, or simply fail to finish all the steps involved in cooking a meal. Needing supervision to cook is 4 points in the PIP scoring system. They will often lack the concentration needed to read and understand a complex passage of text, which gives them 2 points, or take in complex verbal information (4 points). Eight points would get standard daily living.

Travelling safely unaccompanied is often difficult too, because they can't focus sufficiently to follow a route, timetables etc, so they often qualify for standard rate mobility.

And a high proportion of people with ADHD have other problems as well, eg neurodivergence, anxiety.

What are the costs associated with the things you've listed?

LadyKenya · 21/02/2025 12:31

ThisOldThang · 21/02/2025 12:01

What I don't understand about the system is why having anxiety means you get more money than simple Job Seekers Allowance.

I think PIP payments should go to people that have clear incurred costs due to their disability (e.g. Your physical disability means that you have to take more taxis or you're blind and you need to care for a guide dog) or they have 'visible' conditions that prevent them working, such as terminal cancer, brain damage, Downs Syndrome, severe epilepsy, etc.

I just don't see why things like ADHD or mental health results in extra money.

Because you don't understand how these conditions could mean that a person suffering from them, would have extra expenses that they would not have if they did not have those conditions. One small example could be the reliance on ready meals, as some one suffering from depression, may not be motivated enough to cook a meal, but maybe could manage sticking a ready meal in the microwave.

LakieLady · 21/02/2025 12:29

I just don't see why things like ADHD or mental health results in extra money.

In which case, you probably don't realise how difficult life can be for people with ADHD or understand PIP regulations.

People with ADHD often can't cook safely, because they get distracted and wander off while things are on the hob, or simply fail to finish all the steps involved in cooking a meal. Needing supervision to cook is 4 points in the PIP scoring system. They will often lack the concentration needed to read and understand a complex passage of text, which gives them 2 points, or take in complex verbal information (4 points). Eight points would get standard daily living.

Travelling safely unaccompanied is often difficult too, because they can't focus sufficiently to follow a route, timetables etc, so they often qualify for standard rate mobility.

And a high proportion of people with ADHD have other problems as well, eg neurodivergence, anxiety.

LakieLady · 21/02/2025 12:17

Tulipsandaffodils · 20/02/2025 10:00

Something isn’t right here. PiP is very hard to get and needs medical evidence. So either the cousin is winding the op up as he knows she’s judgey, or there is more to his illness than she knows.

I agree.

I work in welfare rights and all my team's clients have mental health problems. They are all under the care of a consultant psychiatrist and many have had recent hospital admissions because of their mental health.

Even with ample medical evidence, we find that around half the PIP applications we make for people are initially refused. We appeal the vast majority of those and our success rate at appeals is almost 100% (someone lost an appeal around 5 years ago, otherwise it would be 100%).

If a team of experienced welfare rights people have a 50% failure rate that is subsequently overturned at appeal, that tells me that 1) it is not that easy to get PIP and 2) that an awful lot of refusals are incorrect.

x2boys · 21/02/2025 12:09

ThisOldThang · 21/02/2025 12:01

What I don't understand about the system is why having anxiety means you get more money than simple Job Seekers Allowance.

I think PIP payments should go to people that have clear incurred costs due to their disability (e.g. Your physical disability means that you have to take more taxis or you're blind and you need to care for a guide dog) or they have 'visible' conditions that prevent them working, such as terminal cancer, brain damage, Downs Syndrome, severe epilepsy, etc.

I just don't see why things like ADHD or mental health results in extra money.

And mental health covers a wide spectrum from mild anxiety, to severe and enduring mental illness, such as schizophrenia, Bi polar ,schizo affective disorder etc.