To leave a four year old downstairs alone for about an hour?

lol.

Love the drama Mamas on here.

This is unbelievably over dramatic.

I agree. And this is not meant as a dig at the OP who I feel for (esp. with for the bathing pile on) but our Mothers certainly didn't go through this. Mine would think nothing of kicking me out into the garden to play whilst she got on with things indoors. She also didn't think her job was to continuously entertain me. Nobody in her friendship group would have considered her neglectful - in fact she was frequently told she was over protective.

@Wonderfulstuff

Couldn't agree more. I don't understand the pearl clutching around a four year old being in a different room just watching a bit of telly or playing for a while. We live in a small house and if I'm busy cooking and doing laundry and so on in the kitchen, my 3 year old will play for an hour or more by himself quite happily. Why do I need to be with him 24/7? He's safe in his own home, I'm right there if he needs me, he's happy in his little 3 year old bubble playing with his toys. Surely that's one of the joys of them getting older is it's not like when you're glued to an 18 month old, struggling to get anything done.

Neither upstairs or downstairs, so I’d assume working or travelling home.

i never had the ease of DH being at home for bath time, he arrived home once they were in bed and had to make do with them being asleep and him looking at them and stroking their heads.

it was sad for him, but he did what he had too, to make us financially secure.

And where the hell is the other parent in this

You can't just leave a 4 year old on his own downstairs for an hour He could literally get up to anything

If he can't join in the bath as a bath let him join in by playing with his sibling

Or limit siblings bath to once every 2 days also they don't need to be bathed every single day

It's absolutely neglectful to just shove 4 year old Infront of the idiot box for an hour while you carry on your perfect routine with the child who isn't already suffering enough

Do you have to bath your toddler every night?

i get that it can take an hour though so don’t understand the comments around the time. And obviously you can’t leave your toddler in the bath to check on your eldest, nor leave them after the bath as if anything like my DD was they’d have been getting up to no good! Some of these comments are ridiculous.

i think it’s ok to leave your eldest downstairs but maybe if you did the toddlers bath every other night then it wouldn’t be so bad, and you wouldn’t feel the guilt as much either.

Edit - just read the comments regarding eczema- I have been given the same advice about not bathing every night for both my kids. It dries their skin out, no matter what you put in it, or don’t put in it.

Sorry meant to say I agree with you @downthesteps !

I think it's fine, DS would let you know if ge was unhappy. My DD, also 4, has eczema. A lot of the 'recommended' products like Aveeno caused her to have a severe reaction and very sore skin. We were also told to do baths every other day and has helped ger skin a lot. Not sure why people are fixating on DS not having a daily bath as the issue. As he gets older though hopefully you can get him doing something that doesn't involve screen time like reading by himself, or all together as you say.

Not true, and mothers would be foolish to trust such a statement. Far better to supervise four year olds.

True though. An average 4yo reception age child does not need constant supervision. My DD at 4 didn't climb bookshelves, she didnt kick balls at the tv, she didnt take random 'sweets' left out on the side and she certainly knew not to touch any pans. Although as a responsible parent she didnt get the opportunity to do any of those things, and im sure OP is also a responsible parent since shes writing this post in the first place.
If a child has difficulties or disabilities then maybe they couldnt be trusted and would put themselves in danger how you described. But for the average child your post was over dramatic and absolutely nuts!

My daughter has excema too ad we were also advised to cut down on the showers/baths what works for 1 person doesn't necessarily work for another. As a parent you will know best. If he's happy and you know he's not going to get up to no good then I would leave him downstairs.why complicate things if its working.

I agree. And this is not meant as a dig at the OP who I feel for (esp. with for the bathing pile on) but our Mothers certainly didn't go through this. Mine would think nothing of kicking me out into the garden to play whilst she got on with things indoors. She also didn't think her job was to continuously entertain me. Nobody in her friendship group would have considered her neglectful - in fact she was frequently told she was over protective.

OP- just trust your judgement and use your common sense e.g. don't leave the family arsenic out in an open bottle with a label on it saying 'yummy, drink me!' (as this is MN I assume your 4yo is a prolific reader already).

Has your 4 year old got learning disabilities?

Did you mean to be so rude?

Being downstairs with the telly on and probably hearing his Mum's voice upstairs, doesn't mean he's having to grow up too soon. He can come and find you if he's lonely, or call up to you.

Has your 4 year old got learning disabilities? My kids at 4 wouldn’t have done any of these things. They would have known all of these thing are dangerous.

I doubt OP would leave tablets around or a pan of water boiling while they were upstairs bathing another child. She’s already expressed her concern for being being alone so she’s hardly going to leave him access to an obstacle course of death 😂

Christ are people really bathing their kids every night 😳 id dread to see our water bill if we did this! 3 or 4 times a week for mine, really not sure why everyday is necessary unless they're covered in mud everyday. OP of course you can leave a 4yo alone for an hour, just shout down to him a few times to make sure hes ok. Nip down to him between bath and book time. The worlds gone mad!

Have you got a tv in your bedroom he can access the programme through so he can be upstairs instead.

My 4 year old would go downstairs in the morning but the older one was usually around aswell.

On subject of eczema, mine had it since baby.
We gave him bath pretty much every day (tepid water with no products) mostly because he was always covered in mud or dirt.
Tried no washing for a few days but didn't make much difference.
Eventually worked out that rolling around in grass in short sleeve/clothes did it, so avoid wearing those when out.
Also know that hard water is bad for eczema as his skin gets really good abroad, but bad in uk.
It is such frustrating condition.

Have you tried removing dairy? My granddaughter's eczema is so much better without it.

Why?

That's fine! I think it was around that age mine started waking up and going downstairs to watch TV in the morning while I slowly woke myself up with a cup of tea in bed! He mustv've been down there about an hour. It's ok I'd say?

Bath baby less too. Only needs a bath 2-3 times a week