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Original poster

Is it really that common to be a grandparent in your late 40s?

538 replies

AntiHop · 19/02/2025 16:09

A few times recently, people have made the incorrect assumption that my 3 year old dd is my grandchild. I'm 47.

This really surprises me, as in my social group, and my family, no one has become a grandparent at that age. Not a single one of my friends had their kids in their 20s. (I have met people who've had kids in their 20s since becoming a parent myself.)

I definitely don't look older than I am. I'm lucky that my skin is doing well. If you lined me up with the friends of my age, you'd guess we are all 47ish. Perhaps people perceive me we older as so many people have cosmetic procedures now, changing the perception of what someone looks like at my age?

I do appreciate that I'm an older mum. Of the friends I grew up with, several of them had babies after my three year old was born.

This is nor meant to be a debate about the rights and wrongs of being an older mum. I'm just curious to know - if you saw a 47 year old with a 3 year old, would you assume that's the grandmother without it crossing your mind that she could be the mother?

OP posts:
Diningtableornot · 19/02/2025 16:17

Where I live there are many grandparents around 50. It depends on your demographic.

CreationNat1on · 19/02/2025 16:17

Do you dress maturely or have a professional tidy, short, hair cut. I think people can present younger or older.

Ddakji · 19/02/2025 16:17

No, probably not but I’m not that good with ages and 47, while young for a grandma, is also quite old for a parent of a 3 year old. As in, I know more people who had kids in their (late 20s) than who had a first child in their mid-40s.
But none of the grown up children in their 20s that I know have had children of their own, in fact most don’t even have a partner!

ValentineValentineV · 19/02/2025 16:17

Not very common or uncommon, two of my best friends are young grandparents. My 49 year old friend has a 9 year old DGC and my 56 year old friend has two DGC aged 10 and 8. They both had daughters at a youngish age who then had DC when they were young.

I only know one person that had a baby when she was 40, all the other mum’s I’ve met were younger.

YoungGunsHavingSomeFunCrazyLadiesKeepEmOnTheRun · 19/02/2025 16:17

I know lots of people who are grandparents at 40/45 age range, it's really not unusual.

I even know someone who was a great grandparent at 42.

SemperIdem · 19/02/2025 16:16

I think, broadly speaking, a 47 year old grandmother of a toddler has been, and probably still is, more common than a 47 year old mother of one.

Househunter2025 · 19/02/2025 16:15

I think there's an age where it could go either way and you would be in that category. Becoming a mum at 44 is probably more unusual than being a grandma at 47 around here but it depends what circles you move in. Personally if in doubt I'd guess mum so as not to offend.

Bjorkdidit · 19/02/2025 16:15

I really wouldn't know because I'm rubbish at guessing people's ages, likely someone who looks like you could be anywhere between about 35 and 60 plus there's the variation in ages that people become parents/grandparents.

There's several women in my extended family who became grandparents at 39, a couple of others younger than that and a couple more in their early 40s.

There's also a weird generational glitch where DC have uncles that are younger than they are.

FrogPonds · 19/02/2025 16:15

It wouldn’t occur to me for a second, but in some socio-economic contexts, it would be far more usual to be a 47 year old grandmother than. 47- year old mother. I used to see my midwife at two different clinics. In one area I (just shy of 40 when I gave birth) was pretty average in terms of who was in the waiting room. In the other, much poorer area, I was the same age as the grandmothers accompanying their pregnant daughters.

iwentjasonwaterfalls · 19/02/2025 16:14

I made my mum a grandmother at 43, but I was in a postnatal group with people who'd had their babies at or approaching 43, so I don't think either is particularly unusual and certainly neither are wrong.

Stai · 19/02/2025 16:14

God no! I don’t know anyone who is a grandparent at 40! Most mothers of babies and toddlers are in their 40s where I live.

ObelixtheGaul · 19/02/2025 16:13

Not now, no. 40 odd years ago I might have, since my own grandmother was around your age when my sister was born, and it was more common to have younger grandparents and less common to have older mothers.

JohnofWessex · 19/02/2025 16:12

When they were younger I got mistaken for my youngest children's grandfather, though I was a few years older than you.

Most people think my wife is a few years younger than she is with our brood in tow