Is it really that common to be a grandparent in your late 40s?

This is how it should be if we were not to dismantle our society completely (And I am an elderly mother too, but the one who realised the error of her ways).

Totally depends on the area. Where I live I'd probably err on the side of mum, but in other areas I've lived/worked in it would be far more common for a 47 year old with a 3yo to be their GM.

I do think 47 is more likely to be the grandmother than the mother. But then most mothers i know had their children late 20s or 30s, noone I know has had a child in their 40s.

I think it's more common to expect a 47 year old grandmother than a 47 year old mother of a 3 year old in most social groups. I know a lot of people who had children in their early to mid thirties but nobody that had a child past the age of 40. It doesn't mean you look old!

My mum had 3 grandchildren by 47.
(Two being mine and one my sibling's)
I am one of four siblings who at that time would have been 18, 20, 23 & 25

I'm in my early 50's. Most of my friends are between the ages of 50 and 60. None of us are grandparents yet, although we all have young adult children.

I had my kids relatively early, when I was in my late 20s. Although my children are now in their early to mid 20s, they are nowhere near ready to have children themselves yet, so it will be a number of years before I'm a grandparent.

It's not common to be a grandparent at 47, but also, regardless of what you've experienced in your peers, it's not common to have a toddler at 47.

Although the average age of having babies is getting older, more 23 year olds are having babies than 44 year olds. Statistically you are more likely to be her grandmother, although both are somewhat deviated from average (not that it matters!)

Sympathies OP!

The lollipop lady at my kids school mistook me for a Grandparent last yr. Kids 7&5 at the time and me 43. I think I look about my age....

I don't know any Grandparents in their 40s either!

That is because you have normal views on life, you have done everything correctly. This is how it should be economically, socially, in every sense.

I am, like the OP, a geriatric mum. I was fed lies by the society about 'going to university', 'getting on with your PhD' and your career. I realise now this is beyond abnormal and wish I had different guidance when growing up.

I probably will be in my late 40 when I become a grandparents as I had my children at 19,20 and 22. My parents are 63 and 64 and will be great grand parents when my nephew has his child in a few months.

I would say most people I know had children in their 20s so late 40s becoming a grand parent wouldn't be usual. I actually don't know anyone who has had children in their 40s.

It's totally contextual. In my social circle most people were 30+ prior to having their first kids. We are now your age and some are still having new babies.

At work I simply never assume and always ask who everyone is.

I had my kids in my 20s - I am now heading for 60 and have no grandkids yet.

Many big my 50-something friends are becoming grandparents now.

Very few in their 40s.

I wouldn't assume either way. If I had to guess I'd assume you were the mother as that's the least likely to cause offence if I'd got it wrong! 🙈

I’m 41 and of the people I know who are my age/year, the oldest offspring is 26 and the youngest still in the planning stages (friends who are TTC) And everywhere in between. I have adult DC and littler ones too. I could quite easily have another and there would be a 20+ year age gap between them.

Its perfectly acceptable to have a baby in your 20s, 30s,40s so there will always be a range.

Half my NCT group were late 20s when we all gave birth so could easily have a 20 year old son or daughter with a child in their late 40s.

I'll be honest: if it's school holidays and the way someone is dressed skews older, and/or they have grey or greying hair, I'd assume grandparent.

I have a mum friend who is the same age as my mum! We both have 3 year olds. I'm definitely a "young" mum around here though despite being married and a homeowner by the time I had my eldest

Would be really young in my experience. Anything under 60 is young for a grandparent. I'll likely be at least 65 before I'm one if it happens.

My mum was a grandmother at 39. She was also married at 16 though.

Relatively common I’d say. Not what I want personally in my 40’s though , I don’t feel old enough to be a grandparent.

I live next door to a RC primary with the village primary 5 minutes walk on the other side. Most mums and dads collecting look in their 30s. At 47 my oldest was 19, I wasn’t a young mum either.

I am however now a grandma at 58, so I think 47 is a young gran but older than I see on a daily basis for a mum of a little one.

I was 39 when I had my first and 41 with my second and must look pretty shocking because I was certainly mistaken for his GP when he first went to nursery. But tbf we are in an area where first time parents are usually much younger than that. My most recent boss was a grandmother at 30. She had her son at 15 and he had his son at 15. Her mum was a GGP at 48. Our cleaner is a GGM at 50.

So I think it's not that unusual to be a GP at the OPs age. DH was a first time parent just shy of the age of 60 and of course it was assumed he was a GP

My mum was 50 when my nephew was born and she became a grandparent for the first time. I’m 57 and none of my immediate friendship group are grandparents yet. DS doesn’t want kids so I doubt I ever will be.

I had 4 DGC at 47.

I think anything younger than 60 is a young grandparent! 60 plus feels around normal in our circles

When I was 34 I met someone born on the same day as me. She had just become a grandmother. (I had my first child 3 years later.)
I would usually think that you can tell from the interactions between the child and the adult whether it is a parent or someone else, but in this as in so many other aspects of life it does seem better not to assume.