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Original poster

Child Invited To Birthday Party Parents Expected To Pay

187 replies

Warrior96 · 18/02/2025 17:34

Hi so I know a child who has been invited to a birthday party, the child is 5. All the kids invited to the birthday party are 5-6 years old so parents will be expected to stay. The invitation asks the parents to pay for themselves. Am I being unreasonable to think this is a bit cheeky?

OP posts:
Gymmum82 · 18/02/2025 18:07

I’ve never had to pay to stay at a soft play party. Even those were adults did have to pay admission. I’d either suck up the £2 or whatever it was or I’d drop and run

Notgivenuphope · 18/02/2025 18:06

Drop and go!

arethereanyleftatall · 18/02/2025 18:05

I think that is fine. If they were insisting that a parent stays that's a different matter. They're not. They're saying 'if you choose to stay, when you don't have to, then you will need to pay entry.' That's fine.

5128gap · 18/02/2025 18:05

Well that's what they've decided to invite you to isn't it? They're paying for your child but not you. So you accept or decline on those terms. Hopefully that's what people will do and not accept and chunter behind the birthday parents back.

Squidgemoon · 18/02/2025 18:04

I went to a LOT of soft play parties when DS was at the nursery/reception to Y1 age and accompanying adults never had to pay, it was included in the party package … are you sure the venue actually requires payment?

septemberremember · 18/02/2025 18:03

Something like this happened at my DS’s fourth birthday party, which was at a trampoline place. You had to pay for a parent to supervise 4 and under aged children. I didn’t read it properly and thought you didn’t have to pay for an adult for four and up. I did pay in the end but it added a massive £85 to the already substantial amount! Never mind, DS enjoyed it!

Nonsense10 · 18/02/2025 18:02

A venue once wanted £10 in order for adults to stay. I could've dropped and ran but additional needs meant I couldn't.

It's ridiculous. Parents shouldn't be charged to stay for a party.

PennyKitchen · 18/02/2025 18:00

titchy · 18/02/2025 17:42

So you'd let a younger uninvited sibling gate crash? You're the reason party kids parents have asked parents to pay for themselves!

Show quote history

It's not gatecrashing if it's a public place with paid entry. They just wouldn't be able to eat the food.

Redfred00 · 18/02/2025 17:57

I've done lots of parties. It cost £16.50 per child for a soft play where I live. That includes a parent / carer but additional adults are £2.50 each. I put child's name plus one adult/ carer on the invite. However, I think it's incredibly rude to invite people and expect them to pay.

Going to parties is expense. I usually buy a gift equivalent to the invite. Then I'm using my weekend to attend. I don't expect to pay for the privilege.

I wouldnt drop and leave. I don't leave my kids with randoms. Just because they are my child's friends parents doesn't mean they are safe adults. I don't know them from Adam.

Pyjamatimenow · 18/02/2025 17:56

5/6 is a bit young for dropping off. It depends what sort of party we’re talking about re parents having to pay

TheWonderhorse · 18/02/2025 17:55

Wonderberry · 18/02/2025 17:51

So parents are welcome to drop and go?

In which case the nominal adult admission for the soft play (it's usually a couple of pounds) if they choose to stay is reasonable. Given some family bizarrely bring 2 or more adults to parties I don't think it's unreasonable to set boundaries.

Why? What's the point of boundaries in a party in a public soft play. If it's in your house I get it, but anyone can go if they want to. I find people often take someone to chat to for the two hours you're sat there for.

Wonderberry · 18/02/2025 17:51

So parents are welcome to drop and go?

In which case the nominal adult admission for the soft play (it's usually a couple of pounds) if they choose to stay is reasonable. Given some family bizarrely bring 2 or more adults to parties I don't think it's unreasonable to set boundaries.

crosskeysgreen · 18/02/2025 17:50

PepsiPepsiPepsi · 18/02/2025 17:49

At the parties at my kids school no one drops the kids and leaves you would look weird if you did that.

Same

Savemefromwetdog · 18/02/2025 17:49

Presumably you can drop and go. If you want to stay, you pay. That’s fine to me.

DC’s friend had a trampoline party the other week. They had plenty of family to supervise, but if you wanted to come in to the trampolines to supervise your own child, you had to pay.

PepsiPepsiPepsi · 18/02/2025 17:49

At the parties at my kids school no one drops the kids and leaves you would look weird if you did that.

Smartiepants79 · 18/02/2025 17:48

Warrior96 · 18/02/2025 17:46

It’s soft play but it’s a very large venue with very limited staff so I don’t think the parent would feel comfortable leaving their child.

That’s their choice then. I’d have left mine. Or I’d have paid. 🤷🏼‍♀️ how much are we talking? more than a fiver? Spend less on the gift.

crosskeysgreen · 18/02/2025 17:47

Warrior96 · 18/02/2025 17:46

It’s soft play but it’s a very large venue with very limited staff so I don’t think the parent would feel comfortable leaving their child.

I wouldn't leave my 7 year old, definitely not.

Soft play parties that I've been to have a party list. You show up, 'here for such and such party', 'great go through'

That's it. No payment.

Hercisback1 · 18/02/2025 17:47

How much? Probably to put people off staying.

pinkypank · 18/02/2025 17:47

You're supposed to drop and go. They're fine.

Original poster
Warrior96 · 18/02/2025 17:46

It’s soft play but it’s a very large venue with very limited staff so I don’t think the parent would feel comfortable leaving their child.

OP posts:
crosskeysgreen · 18/02/2025 17:45

user1471538275 · 18/02/2025 17:44

At that age you leave the children - like you do at school every day.

Why on earth would parents stay??

Many parents stay for the social.

That's not the point of the thread anyway

user1471538275 · 18/02/2025 17:44

At that age you leave the children - like you do at school every day.

Why on earth would parents stay??

crosskeysgreen · 18/02/2025 17:43

@titchy not gate crashing if it's a public venue is it

crosskeysgreen · 18/02/2025 17:42

MuddyPawsIndoors · 18/02/2025 17:40

All the kids invited to the birthday party are 5-6 years old so parents will be expected to stay.

Why?

That's a perfectly normal age to drop and run (having left your phone number), especially when the event is staffed.

As a PP said, if any parents decide they want to stay with their child then of course they should pay to do so.

No one really drops and leaves at our school.

They're in year two now!

Eldermilleniallyogii · 18/02/2025 17:42

That doesn't make sense. What kind of party is it? Parents of invitees are usually able to attend as well. It would be either the 5-6 year olds can be left or if parents need to be there then they should be let in.

If the venue doesn't allow that then the parents of the child who is having the party should be paying.