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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Being naked in front of DP/DH

465 replies

SnowflakeSmasher86 · 17/02/2025 15:12

Are you comfortable being visibly naked in front of your partner? Would you be ok with the lights on/daylight etc and walk around with nothing on?

Or would you have a towel/underwear/a sheet over you?

i’m not bothered about my wobbly bits on a daily basis, and felt just the same way when I was several stone lighter, so I don’t see it as a body image thing as such, I juat wouldn’t walk around naked in front of him. He thinks this says something fundamental about our relationship.

YABU - I think its normal to feel 100% at ease walking about naked in front of my DP/DH

YANBU - I’d rather keep some things undercover and feel self conscious naked standing up and walking about the bedroom/house.

OP posts:
SallyWD · 17/02/2025 16:27

The thing is, I just never wall around naked. Even if I'm alone in the house, I don't walk around naked because I've never done it and it feels weird. Our house is a bit chilly and I'm someone who likes to be warm and cosy so I'll always have something covering me.
However, I don't mind DH seeing me naked. He's often in bathroom when I'm in the shower for example and he sees me getting dressed and undressed. Neither of us have the perfect body but that's ok.

maximalistmaximus · 17/02/2025 16:26

AGoodDayToDie · 17/02/2025 15:31

not a chance!

he has never even seen my stomach, i hate it, it is covered at all times, we have been together since 1987

I'm baffled by the practicality of this??

H0P · 17/02/2025 16:26

He checked my piles the other day. No issues with nakedness here 😂

Original poster
SnowflakeSmasher86 · 17/02/2025 16:26

ItGhoul · 17/02/2025 16:12

I’m perfectly happy for my partner to see me naked. It’s never really occurred to me that this might be a problem for someone and I’m amazed by some of the replies on this thread. I don’t like my own body very much but I’ve no wish to hide it from my own partner.

I can’t imagine any sexual relationship in which I wasn’t comfortable being naked in front of the other person.

Serious question for those of you who can’t bear for your partner to see you naked: does this not have an impact on your sex life? Are you covering up during sex as well?! Or only doing it in complete darkness?

Absolutely each to their own, and of course people should only do what they’re comfortable with. But I know I’d feel pretty sad if my partner didn’t want me to see him naked.

Thank you for all the replies. To be honest i was expecting far more like me and far less completely comfortable so I’m happy for you all and need to have a think about why I feel the way I do.

It does have an impact on sex, in that I’d rather have low light and don’t like going on top (I will do it but i’m very aware of my stomach being on display! TMI but he’d love me to sit on his face and I absolutely couldn’t ever!!)

Like others, its not necessarily weight related, its the saggy wrinkly “mum tum” that is my biggest issue. I love my boobs being bigger and don’t care about thighs etc.

Its come about because he’ll mention my weight in passing, trying to be sensitive eg booking tickets to see a comedian and DP ‘warned’ me that there is a segment where this comedian jokes about his weight gain and DP says “I just didn’t want you to be uncomfortable as he talks about how he’s overweight too, and I know you’re sensitive about your weight”

When i protest that I’m not sensitive about my weight, I just don’t really want it brought up out of the blue, he cites my reluctance to be ‘on display’ as evidence.

I just thought it was quite normal not to be 100% comfortable being naked, but apparently its not as common as I thought.

OP posts:
AlmostAJillSandwich · 17/02/2025 16:21

My fiance has never seen me naked, i hate my torso so its always a baggy as possible shirt on. I dont care about how my genitals look, but my stomach i hate so no.

AsLivingArrows · 17/02/2025 16:20

NotAlwaysasitSeems · 17/02/2025 16:11

I don't think shape is the issue, I think its more weight/post dcs bodies that make some women feel insecure. Some women have prefect figures, and still feel insecure!

Show quote history

Yeah I suppose anyone can feel insecure, even women who are 'flawless'.

SamVan · 17/02/2025 16:19

NotAlwaysasitSeems · 17/02/2025 16:13

What does SO, stand for? Usually know most abbreviations on here, but cannot work this one out 😂

Show quote history

Significant other 😂 not all at the same time though obviously.

sweeneytoddsrazor · 17/02/2025 16:18

How have you managed to go near enough 40 years without uour DH seeing your stomach?

Archive · 17/02/2025 16:17

I used to happily walk around naked with him around. He, however, decided to call me fat during an argument a few months ago so that has very much changed. I know he regrets it but he can never take that back & I can never kid myself about how he seems me again - my hatred of my body is made worse by being heavily pregnant and I’m dreading him seeing me giving birth 😔

BabyDream2025 · 17/02/2025 16:15

I’m 100% comfortable.

Dancingatthepinkponyclub · 17/02/2025 16:13

I love my body and so does my husband! I didn’t used to but am confident now. I’m a size 8 and toned with tiny boobs but I happily let my husband see me naked! Not so much my son as don’t want to embarrass him!

NotAlwaysasitSeems · 17/02/2025 16:13

SamVan · 17/02/2025 16:11

I like being naked. Like @MyUmberSeal i also do stupid dances for my husband and I’ve also always liked my SOs to watch me shower as it’s a nice time to have a chat.

What does SO, stand for? Usually know most abbreviations on here, but cannot work this one out 😂

ItGhoul · 17/02/2025 16:12

I’m perfectly happy for my partner to see me naked. It’s never really occurred to me that this might be a problem for someone and I’m amazed by some of the replies on this thread. I don’t like my own body very much but I’ve no wish to hide it from my own partner.

I can’t imagine any sexual relationship in which I wasn’t comfortable being naked in front of the other person.

Serious question for those of you who can’t bear for your partner to see you naked: does this not have an impact on your sex life? Are you covering up during sex as well?! Or only doing it in complete darkness?

Absolutely each to their own, and of course people should only do what they’re comfortable with. But I know I’d feel pretty sad if my partner didn’t want me to see him naked.

NotAlwaysasitSeems · 17/02/2025 16:11

AsLivingArrows · 17/02/2025 15:42

I don't hugely care who sees me naked. I wouldn't think anything of being naked in front of a partner.

I do have a classic hourglass figure though so it's much easier to feel relaxed about it.

I don't think shape is the issue, I think its more weight/post dcs bodies that make some women feel insecure. Some women have prefect figures, and still feel insecure!

SamVan · 17/02/2025 16:11

I like being naked. Like @MyUmberSeal i also do stupid dances for my husband and I’ve also always liked my SOs to watch me shower as it’s a nice time to have a chat.

rashdecisi0n · 17/02/2025 15:48

AGoodDayToDie · 17/02/2025 15:31

not a chance!

he has never even seen my stomach, i hate it, it is covered at all times, we have been together since 1987

You've spent nearly 40 years making sure your partner doesn't see you naked, including during sex? That sounds exhausting and I think it's sad that you feel you can't just relax around him.

Huckyfell · 17/02/2025 15:45

He walks around starkers, I use a bit more modesty as don't like him looking. I'm also grumpy in the morning when that time tends to be.

MyUmberSeal · 17/02/2025 15:42

Yes absolutely no issue being naked in front of husband, and I do stupid dances while naked to make him laugh.

AsLivingArrows · 17/02/2025 15:42

I don't hugely care who sees me naked. I wouldn't think anything of being naked in front of a partner.

I do have a classic hourglass figure though so it's much easier to feel relaxed about it.

Screamingabdabz · 17/02/2025 15:39

I don’t walk around naked so much now because my body is fat and old and nobody wants to see that but yes, I think there is something wrong in your relationship if you’re shy or ashamed of showing your naked body to your partner. You should be as free and at ease as you are with yourself.

Azuresky68 · 17/02/2025 15:39

Such an interesting range of views! Everyone is entitled to feel the way they do without being judged.

CoffeeCakeAndALattePlease · 17/02/2025 15:36

I’m very obese and generally hate being seen undressed or in swimwear etc. But I’m happy to be naked at home in front of DH and DC….. I feel 100% comfortable with them.

NotAlwaysasitSeems · 17/02/2025 15:36

Dotjones · 17/02/2025 15:27

It's normal to walk round naked in front of your partner but you're entitled to feel how you feel. Your partner is right that it says something about your relationship, it sends the message that you don't trust him and that you don't believe his attraction to you is genuine.

I an guilty of this. Dh has no problem walking around infront of me. I on the other hand, have no issues walking around in underwear no matter the lighting, but i'm only comfortable naked on the bottom half in very low almost dark lighting. My dcs did a number on my lower stomach, and it is my major hang up. I am slim and still it looks awful in the daylight, all the marks!

Mrsttcno1 · 17/02/2025 15:36

I’ve got no issues being seen by my husband naked, it doesn’t bother me at all. I’ve had a baby, he’s seen me (and down there) during labour/childbirth, my boobs were out pretty much constantly for months while breastfeeding, and he was the one who helped me to shave while heavily pregnant & to shower/clean myself postpartum. Once you’ve hit that level or comfortable I don’t think there’s any going back😂

namechangeGOT · 17/02/2025 15:35

Absolutely comfortable to walk around naked, sit chatting naked, dance naked, anything naked! I have quite an intense ED, but he's probably the one and only person that I know gives no fucks about me prancing about with nothing on and I intend to take full advantage of that.