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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

DH not happy

264 replies

Babyitscoldoutside1 · 16/02/2025 18:57

I have just entertained DMIL DFIL and all the family for a roast dinner. We had a bottle of bubbles when they arrived. I cooked and served a full roast. Then we went for a walk, we have 4 under 5.
When we got back I did teas and coffees for everyone. Cleared, unloaded and reloaded the dishwasher etc. As well as breastfeeding a baby.
Had a quick dance party to tire kids out.
during which DH commented I was drunk and should stop dancing.
We have now put the kids to bed.
Have poured a glass of wine out of what was left from DMIL and DFiL bottle they left with us. Fully thought I earned it but maybe not. Am I wrong.

OP posts:
FartfulCodger · 16/02/2025 19:33

What was his exact reason for not helping even a tiny bit? He sounds so lazy.

And yeah, ignore the judgment over the wine.

DancingDucks · 16/02/2025 19:31

Have you asked him what the problem is?

BunnyLake · 16/02/2025 19:30

It would all depend on what your usual drinking habits are and if they've caused any friction in the past.

TwinkleLights24 · 16/02/2025 19:27

I would tell him to fuck off and run around after his family on his own next time.

decorativecushions · 16/02/2025 19:26

Yanbu op.

3 glasses of wine over an entire day, with food and presumably soft drinks too, is fine whilst breastfeeding. The alcohol that passes to your milk is a drop in the ocean. You'd have to be absolutely black out drunk for it to harm the baby.

Hoppinggreen · 16/02/2025 19:26

Firstly your H should help more, he is a Dick
Secondly I am not a medical expert but I don't think BF would be recommended after 3 glasses of wine
Thirdly do you drink a lot in general or have any issues with alcohol? Saying you "deserve" a glass COULD indicate an unhealthy relationship

Springadorable · 16/02/2025 19:26

As long as you're sober enough to hold your baby you can breastfeed. The amount of alcohol in breast milk is the same as your blood alcohol content...so about the same as baby having fruit juice which obviously wouldn't have any ill effects from an alcohol point of view.

Only becomes an issue if you also bed share which is a hard no after drinking.

Sunnydiary · 16/02/2025 19:25

What’s he cross about?

And why did you do all the work?

FrannyScraps · 16/02/2025 19:25

DappledThings · 16/02/2025 19:24

You are welcome to do so. As am I with you and OP is free to.

Three glasses over a full day with a large meal and exercise. Absolutely fine.

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Very happy to agree to disagree!

DappledThings · 16/02/2025 19:24

FrannyScraps · 16/02/2025 19:23

I disagree.

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You are welcome to do so. As am I with you and OP is free to.

Three glasses over a full day with a large meal and exercise. Absolutely fine.

FrannyScraps · 16/02/2025 19:23

DappledThings · 16/02/2025 19:22

Completely normal and fine.

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I disagree.

Original poster
Babyitscoldoutside1 · 16/02/2025 19:22

Wow the breastfeeding and drinking haters with no scientific proof are out in force today. Fml. I guess u can join my husband in the bin

OP posts:
DappledThings · 16/02/2025 19:22

FrannyScraps · 16/02/2025 19:06

Drinking alcohol and breastfeeding?

Sure.

Completely normal and fine.

ClairDeLaLune · 16/02/2025 19:21

Justcallmebebes · 16/02/2025 19:10

It's perfectly OK to breastfeed and have a glass of wine

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One small one in a day. Not 3 of whatever size we don’t know.

ClairDeLaLune · 16/02/2025 19:20

You shouldn’t drink 3 glasses of wine if you’re BF, so I’ve voted YABU. Your husband IBVU for not sharing the workload however.

godmum56 · 16/02/2025 19:19

Tell him to go and do one

Cottonplease · 16/02/2025 19:13

Miserable sod.

healthybychristmas · 16/02/2025 19:12

I think he and his parents should've taken the children out for a walk so that you could have a rest after cooking.

Wavescrashingonthebeach · 16/02/2025 19:11

FrannyScraps · 16/02/2025 19:10

She's on her third....

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Yes, of the entire day, hours apart, with a huge roast dinner in between. Not back to back on an empty stomach.

FrannyScraps · 16/02/2025 19:10

Justcallmebebes · 16/02/2025 19:10

It's perfectly OK to breastfeed and have a glass of wine

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She's on her third....

Calamitousness · 16/02/2025 19:10

Nothing wrong drinking alcohol and breastfeeding. There’s guidance to follow. I’d be so tempted to open another bottle just to piss him off more. Judgemental useless husband. Why did you do everything. Why can’t he cook and entertain his family. And clean up and entertain kids.

Justcallmebebes · 16/02/2025 19:10

FrannyScraps · 16/02/2025 19:06

Drinking alcohol and breastfeeding?

Sure.

It's perfectly OK to breastfeed and have a glass of wine

Roseshavethorns · 16/02/2025 19:08

Is he maybe concerned that you are drinking alcohol and breastfeeding? I thought you were supposed to have a number of hours between alcohol and feeding.

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 16/02/2025 19:07

What a twat. What is the point of him? What was he doing while you were doing all the cooking, feeding the baby and keeping the children entertained (and enjoying it, by the sound of it!).

FrannyScraps · 16/02/2025 19:06

Drinking alcohol and breastfeeding?

Sure.

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