To feel annoyed DH cooked something he knows I don't like

Well no, he decided to cook her a dish that she has told him is “delicious”
The doesn’t like things cooked in tomato sauce is a general rule and obviously his special dish is the delicious exception because she told him so.

This is a weird one.
He sounds like he’s done something really nice for you but the base ingredient is the one you really don’t like? And then on top of that he said “I know you don’t like this…” and you ended with “it was nice”.
I think I’ve gone through the same rollercoaster of “awww… wait… hang on… wtf?” as you OP probably for the same “women should be grateful” reasons we’ve all been dragged up on.

I think you can rectify your comments without causing conflict by just saying “look I know I said I liked it but honestly, I didn’t. And you knew I wouldn’t. I appreciate the effort of you cooking a meal but next time please can you cook something you know I will like, whether that means following a recipe or even choosing an easier meal” blah blah something like that.

YABU.
mixed messages here. He knows you don’t like things cooked in tomato sauce, but the exception is his dish because you’ve said it is delicious.

It’s a bit like someone saying they don’t like cheese but then say they think cheese cake is delicious.

Or saying normally they can’t stand jalapeño peppers but with nachos that’s yummy.

You know the saying, there is an exception to every rule. That’s what you’ve told him. That his dish is the exception to your rule.

These resentments all come from dishonesty in communication.

He can't follow a recipe or remember what you like. Sounds like a catch.

Agree!
Why on earth did you tell him you liked it?

Aw, poor you, how awful it must be to be in your shoes.

Is that what you wanted to hear? Because fuck that, your wife has religious and dietary restrictions. It’s not even remotely a ‘nightmare’ – it’s completely normal, and you’re embarrassing yourself getting on here to complain about it.

My DH is a severely picky eater, I don’t eat a lot of foods, and we make it work just fine by experimenting and finding things we both like or making separate meals – it’s not exactly rocket science.

Yeah this.

Being able to cook only ONE dish is a bit pathetic. People can learn to cook!

or buying an actual present.

I would have not said it is delicious - I would have said this is what you give the woman you love - something you know she doesn't like? Yeah happy Valentine's day and ordered a takeaway and if he was 'upset' tough shit - he should use his brain. I would be making stuff I know he didn't like for the next week and tell him it is a sign of how much you love him.

Really? She didn't ask him to cook. He decided to cook her a meal he knows she doesn't like as his gift to her.

He KNEW she didn’t like it and made it anyway, she’s likely been conditioned into being polite like billions of us have. We can’t help it, we’ve spent our life being conditioned to be that way and he’s taking advantage of that by making something she doesn’t like as a present - lazy, cheap, unimaginative, insulting……

Doesn’t sound even remotely like the same thing, you just want to moan about your wife, no one wants to hear it tbh because we all know she’s likely doing a million other things for you.

The bar is literally in hell. The man knew you wouldn’t like it and cooked it anyway because no doubt he likes it and it’s easier to cook something you’re familiar with.

They are pathetic. Cook something he doesn’t like tomorrow and say ‘I know you don’t like it but here you go.’ Accompany that with a wink and refuse to engage in an argument.

I have little patience with adults who "can't" cook. He can cook- it's a basic skill and following a recipe is within the capabilities of any adult who is capable of holding down a job. It is silly that you said you liked it though. Why? He knows you don't, you know you dont- no need for the lie. He disappointed you. He should know that.

If it’s all he knows how to cook I don’t blame him going with it.

Surely he’s capable of reading a recipe? Watching a video? Using those transferable skills?

My wife has so many thinkgs she won’t eat, be it for religious purposes or preferences it’s a nightmare. I used to love cooking but shes’s completely put me off cooking. If it’s all he knows how to cook I don’t blame him going with it.

So he made you something where one of the main ingredients is something he knows you don’t like? For a special treat he made you something he knew you wouldn’t enjoy? Out of all the dishes in the world he could have made? Um..I think k is start only cooking things I liked whether he liked them or not and if there is something he really doesn’t like eating, that ingredient would be in every dish for the next month. Petty? Yes, but tough luck on him.

I voted YABU because you told him it was delicious when you didnt mean it. And are now complaining about it. You should have been straight with him. You dont have to be argumentative. You could have said, I appreciate the effort but I don't like tomatoes. A toasted cheese sandwich would be nice..... or whatever...

It's little resentments like this that build up over the years and ruin Relationships. Just communicate with him.

🙄