To not go to pub because I look young..

Have your ID ready in your hand. When you see them look at you twice show them. They'll probably take a quick look and in you go, no fuss. If the other mums see they'll probably make jokes about wishing it was them and that'll be that. Please don't let this put you off enjoying a night out. DD is 30s and it happens to her all the time.

They don’t think you look under 18 - they think you look under 25, which is who they’re meant to ID.

I was last IDed in an off licence when I was 35.

Go and enjoy yourself.

at 39 I genuinely still get asked for ID reasonably regularly. Not every time anymore. That stopped at around 35 but often enough that I wouldn’t got for a night out without ID as there is a risk that I could be asked and how embarrassing would it be not to get into somewhere when you’re pushing 40!

I also have a 20 year old daughter and it’s fun to see people’s reactions to this. I can’t believe there are people out there who believe it’s not possible to get asked for ID in your late 30s or 40s.

I got IDd for wd40 bike oil spray at 32... its apparently a 16 limit. I don't drink so didn't have proper ID. They wouldn't accept work ID that said I was a Dr, car keys and a credit card to prove I wasn't sub 16, so told them I have better things to so with my life than sniff solvents so the bike will have to stay rusty.

Op honestly noone will bat an eye lid just laugh and smile

Hardly. Google it. We're quite the cottage industry. 😀

You might say this happens because some people are shit at gauging age, and perhaps that's true - MN is after all full of posters who swear up and down they think 29 year old Timothée Chalamet looks like a 12 year old.

😂. My sister got a 90s boy band, curtains hair cut last year. She was a 30 year old woman, but was constantly mistaken for a teenage boy 😂. She soon grew it out.

Just take your ID. You’ll be fine.

im nearly 40 and got asked for ID to buy paracetamol the other day. I didn’t have my ID but my 20 year old dd1 did. She showed hers and I told the woman she was my daughter and she just walked off looking confused and saying oh gosh over and over again. Was quite funny tbh.

it also made my day a couple of months ago and I was out with my work colleagues who were mainly in their 20s. I got asked for ID along with them to get into Wetherspoons. Just enjoy the fact you’ve aged well. You’ll miss being asked when it stops.

i just thought of a time about 5 years ago(I was 30) and husband ordered food and drinks at the bar and pointed at our table I was sitting at - and the man said over at the table the little boy is sitting at (it was me at the table) I had very short pixi hair cut at the time 🤣🤣🤣

But some of us are very small, and I always looked young. I never tried to get a drink in a pub until I was eighteen, and I always, always took my passport in so they had photo ID (this was before photo driving licences) as I was always checked.

I still look young from the back... 😂

This happens me too! I don’t necessarily it’s cus they think in actually 16

but more that I dress quite casual - always in a band T-shirt and skinny jeans with converse and a flannel shirt and I don’t really wear any make up and I’m very short as well 5ft

so it’s probably more of a hmmm can’t be too sure and they just double check.

it’s not a big deal at all.

i find putting an age on people super difficult

Just because its not common, doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

Look on the bright side. You look younger than your age now and that will more than likely continue as you age. It may be a bit embarrassing now but just laugh it off because you'll be pleased when you reach the milestones of 40 and 50 and people think you look much younger than you are. Win win!

Yes but we can make judgements from what we see, and I don't regularly see grown women getting id'd in shops.

Only on mumsnet are there the posters claiming they still got id'd in their late 30s and 40s 🙄 people may well say you look young, good for your age but most people look their age and looking younger is in their heads.

This is mumsnet, so any time someone posts about something that hasn't happened specifically to them, they make up ridiculous straw man arguments or exaggerated statistics because the dont have the bandwidth to fathom that everybody is different and has different lived experiences to them (or are bitter that it hasn't happened to them).

How would you know?

OP, this was my SIL, she was still being IDd for cigarettes in her 40s, she once has some teen girls try and pick a fight with her when she was in a queue with her teen daughters and also had the being dismissed thing when pregnant because they thought she was a child.

Sadly there is nothing you can do but embrace it, just think, most people would love to be IDd in their 30s. We all have something we don’t like about ourselfs that make us feel conscious, but learning to embrace these things dose get better with age.

This is mumsnet so many posters insisting they are regularly I,d despite being 40,50,60 etc.

Oh yes they do. I was regularly asked for ID until I was around forty.

Humans are biologically disposed to make themselves look the best as possible, so signs of weakness in others will be exploited.

Treat any request for ID as everyday and a non-event. I would be more inclined to be impressed than to laugh at it, but if anyone does they would probably quickly drop it when they see it's not something you are bothered by.

😂

I look so young someone once asked me when my due date was. I said I wasn't pg and they clarified they meant when I was due to be born.

I know how you feel cause I've been there. I'm nearly 44 and don't get asked now but it only stopped a few years ago. I don't look much different now to when i was 17 and people are forever shocked at my age. Like you I suffer social anxiety too and it used to make me feel rubbish. Just quickly hand the id over and walk past. It's either that or you miss put on a good night out. Feel the fear and do it anyway! I tell myself that when a situation comes up I struggle with.

I would definitely go. I used to look young and worried about this, however people didn't care as much then so usually I didn't get asked.
I've asked for ID in the shop I work for people over 30, and honestly, I'm only doing this because I don't always trust myself to judge if someone is under 25, it's never because I don't think they are old enough to buy the item.
It won't be long before being asked for ID will make your friends jealous, I can assure you!

I was still getting regularly IDd into my 30s. It was complimentary, I think i looked young in a a really naive way not a genuinely youthful way.

At 26 someone asked me when I was out with my parents which school O would be going to when I started my GCSEs.

All stopped pretty much overnight around 34/35.