To be dreading the half term because of my daughter's neediness?

Has she ever been told “no”?

I was reading your OP thinking this sounds just like my DS (also 7), he was recently diagnosed with ADHD.
I’ve also seen the number of other people throughout the thread saying ADHD as well. You say school aren’t on board, which could make it harder for a diagnosis, but girls apparently are excellent at masking. My son never masks at school so we didn’t have this issue. I would say a meeting with school would be a first step, I mean are they just glossing over the fact that she can barely read?

I would massively recommend the book “How not to murder your ADHD kid”.
The title is purely attention grabbing, as the book is fantastic. There are so many behaviours and struggles that kids with ADHD have that you don’t even think about and it explains it all, and gives advice on how to deal with this. It really helps you reframe how you think about your child, I have so much sympathy for my DS and what he has to deal with every day.

If she does have ADHD her brain is constantly searching for dopamine hits, and she’s desperately trying to get you to help fill that need (I’d highly recommend a trampoline for the garden if you haven’t already got one). If you can also find something she’s massively into an ADHD brain will hyper focus on this as it gives them the dopamine they want. For example my son is currently obsessed with Minecraft/roblox videos on YouTube and would spend a whole day watching these if we let him. But this is an easy way to occupy him if he or us need downtime, or if we need to transition him from leaving the house, or coming back home etc, without there being a meltdown.

Sounds like a good idea to get her involved in sporting activities. Then maybe private ADHD assessment if that is possible?
Could ask school how they manage - bet her teacher really needs half term (not saying this is just because of her - teachers always really need half term!)

She is probably masking in school

She is can barely read at 7…. I would arrange a meeting with the school tell what’s going on at home.

Look at holiday clubs. We had no choice because we both worked but our DC loved it at 7 til they didn’t then we let them stay home from 11 years onwards..

TBH you make your 7 year old sound like an untrained pet that is an annoyance to you. We always embraced our DC and pretty much played with them or did homework with them til they went to bed. Around 10/11 they naturally wanted more independence and space and we gave it to them.

id put her in holiday club!

Love the idea of hoovering. Hoovering or ADHD?

She needs things to go:
books to read
a still life to sketch and then paint it in 2 different versions
sort out her room
hoover

then at lunch or break talk about the book, the sketch or whatever

She needs direction

I agree but we get worn down and worn out. Is OP on her own, does she have support?

Tricky.

I think if mine had thrown a ball at me I would have take it off them.

Mum is busy, go and amuse yourself for a while please

No I don't want to play your game right now

I could have written this about my adhd 7 year old. It’s so very hard.

I also don't like to be "that poster" but your post is screaming ADHD at me. Please have a read up about it and, if it rungs a bell, push for assessment (bypass the school if necessary).

She does sound like my adhd son at that age. I found it as hard as you’re describing. Turns out he has adhd, I have adhd plus autism - communication drains me and having to talk when I’m tired makes me feel like crying. So those were fun times..

I get it!

I thought I was a horrible person until my best friend took him out for the day and returned exhausted saying “I think that boy needs some Ritalin!” “He doesn’t stop!” And she was a talker herself 😆

I laughed it off, I had no idea about adhd. He’s now been diagnosed as an adult.

She sounds exactly like my daughter was as a child! She is 15 now and only recently diagnosed with ADHD and autism. I fought battles with teachers all through her primary years as they maintained she was fine at school. It was only when puberty hit that her school started to see the behaviour she exhibited at home. It’s known that ND females can mask very well when not at home or with people they can relax with, meaning others don’t see their true behaviour. Take her to the GP and explain how she is at home, they will more than likely refer her for a neuro diversity assessment. It’s interesting that she struggles with reading also. My daughter is dyslexic and this is common in people with ADHD or autism. Wishing you both well xx

Could you try to kill 2 birds with one stone by playing games that subtly encourage reading so that at least you feel it's productive?

After meals (all of them) institute a new rule that everyone has to be in their own room for a quiet half an hour. She can read/play/do colouring, but she can’t come out until you come to get her. Immediately it gives you a short break, but it should help her learn how to entertain herself a bit more.

It’s kids like this that end up in the Olympics - seriously get her into sport - swim training, triathlon, park run etc

read interviews with lots of sports stars and they often say they have adhd.

Yep. My six year old has just got back from a two hour bike ride in the woods and proceeded to immediately start jumping on the sofas like trampolines.
(He’s currently sitting on the step because it’s the second time I’ve had to tell him to not do it today)

Reminds me of DC2, who is now 20 and been diagnosed with ADHD and dyslexia. Wish we'd realized when she was at school.

Hi, the behaviour you have described could have been my daughter. My health visitor decided it was actually due to my ‘lack parenting skills’, and came round to demonstrate to me ‘how to parent’. Two hours later the HV had to go home as she was absolutely exhausted - ‘my dear she’s never stopped. She ran up and down the room nearly all the time, I showed her her dolls house and offered to play with her, but she only stopped for a couple of minutes and then started to run again - she never stopped. You poor dear - you need help!’.
My daughter was diagnosed subsequently, aged 6, with ADHD. Fortunately we moved away shortly after and the excellent paediatrician at the new town (thank you NHS!) reckoned it could be chemical and asked us to keep a food diary. That was such a hard thing for me to do, especially as she was in primary school by then. It turned out she was sensitive to quite a few foods - artificial food colouring especially. This is a while back and they were in everything then - even toothpaste. She is also sensitive to artificial sweeteners (which is a nightmare since the sugar tax.) The moment we changed her diet she was a different girl - calm, relaxed , just lovely. Things of course did creep in (especially one appalling Christmas Day after lunch - after which my mum and I tipped the bin on the drive and worked our way through everything looking for the culprit - turned out that the tin of strawberries used in the trifle had the additives in).
She went on to do brilliantly at school.
it’s definitely worth having a look to see if there are any food sensitivities there first - it’s not easy to do, but certainly worth a look.
Ive another relative going through this at the moment. The good news is that apparently ADHD peaks about 9 or 10 (we have been told) as the child learns to manage it better. We shall see - in the meantime we are working on a food diary.!

My daughter went on Zoloft first, and after three months tried stimulant medication. We had a few different ones until we found concerta worked best for her. She’ll be on Zoloft until the end of this year.

she’s got goals to be a teacher and help “kids like her” because she knows what it’s like. She’s doing a course that will get her into university for teaching and is really working hard for her goals

medication was never something I thought I’d do when I thought of myself as a parent but for us it’s really made a difference.

My dd is ADHD and autistic I bought her a ds when she was 7 or 8? Took some of the pressure off me

My DD was/is exactly like this - now in the process of getting ADHD assessed and diagnosed. It’s often dismissed by schools if the child is keeping up academically - the school picked it up fairly late for my DD for this reason

1. Make a timetable for the week, words or words and pictures. A mix of outdoor , fun things and " Mum needs space" times.
2. Be firm, be consistent.
3. Look after you.
4. Make an appointment with school. Insist on a half hour or so, not 2 minutes.