To think buying and selling homes could be made much much simpler..

I live in a market town and a lot of people in small houses keep chickens here

This is a big part of it.
Regulations around paperwork for everything that has ever been done to the house are getting tighter and tighter, regulations imposed by the Lender.
Most people don't have the paperwork.
While indemnity policies can help, sometimes they're not acceptable.

I am curious how it works on other countries where it all goes through so quickly. Presumably the seller has to prove the property is mortgageable before marketing it. Otherwise you'd offer on a house, be committed to buying and then discover you can't get a mortgage?

A lot of houses in this country are in quite a state particularly after Brexit/Covid has made getting trades very difficult. Our house needs some work doing to it but we are old, tired and the effort involved in getting people in just seems too much. There's no doubt that a survey would bring up a lot of issues even if we told prospective purchasers that we know the house needs work and would price accordingly. Then there's the ever changing rules around regulations with things like electrics and plumbing. Work that was done on our house decades ago just doesn't have the necessary paperwork that is issued today.

Although I agree that the systems stinks and it would be wonderful if it could move more quickly I just don't know how sellers like ourselves and I am sure plenty of others could avoid prospective purchasers getting cold feet when we can't give them the paperwork needed or have works done in advance.

How other countries manage I don't know. Maybe their housing stock is just better than a lot of ours.

My last house move was here in Sweden and it was so straight forward. The whole process from first viewing to getting the keys took 2 weeks.

It's quick because everything is done by the estate agents selling the property. We made an offer. Offer was accepted. A week later we all met at the bank (us, them, estate agent, bank manager) and all the paperwork and legal stuff was done there and the keys were handed over.

I totally get you OP. I am currently in the process of selling/buying. Alot of patience is required plus a large glass of wine in the evenings😂

Have you looked at the actual process, each step, process and how it fits together? Have you read the protocol, do you even know it exists and is what all house sales are processed on.

The process for the legals itself really is not inefficient at all, it just has elements of it that are entirely out of the conveyancers control and generally it's those areas that go askew and hold things up, number 1 culprits being the buyer and seller themselves.

It's possible to do the entire legals in an afternoon. I've done several from start to finish within a week to 10 days.

Add in a chain, buyers and sellers working to different timescales and priorities, a seller or buyer that can't cope with dealing with things online etc and time is going to get added in

there is no chain, the buyer is not relying on a sale to purchase this house

This is irrelevant to the documents needed, inquiries etc.

The list of questions and documents I have to provide is endless

That would be the anti-momey-laundeeing/anti-bribeey checks. They are compulsory.

... there was a query over land registry ,,. When I asked (politely) why this hadn't been dealt with during the original purchase I was told 'it's a bit of a grey area'. ???

Obviously we don't know the details, but in my area of law the "grey area" could well be "well we asked your parents if they wanted to deal with this the first time round but they didn't want to incur the necessary fees to get it sorted".

The process can be inefficient, no one is denying that. The point several of us are trying to make is that there can be many reasons for delays, including in particular estate agents and mortgage providers (and clients themselves). Solicitors can be inefficient too (or just plain incompetent, like any service provider can be!), but it's not a conspiracy to bump up fees, more likely that it's a cheapo firm (often affiliated with the estate agent) offering an unrealistic fixed fee.

I agree it is a total nightmare, I am currently selling on behalf of an elderly parent who has moved into care ... there is no chain, the buyer is not relying on a sale to purchase this house; the SAME solicitor dealt with the house sale to my parent when they purchased (and acted for the seller at the time ... wouldn't be permitted now). But the list of questions and documents I have to provide is endless ... there was a query over land registry ,,. When I asked (politely) why this hadn't been dealt with during the original purchase I was told 'it's a bit of a grey area'. ???
I dread to think how my elderly parent would cope if they did not have me to sort out all these issues ... what happens in such cases?

No, you were using what you thought was a good example of a solicitor's inefficiency. It wasn't. You just look as if you don't know what you're talking about, nothing wrong with that, after all you're (quite obviously) not a lawyer. What is wrong is spouting off when you don't know what you're talking about.
Why not keep quiet?

It just made you look ignorant.

I am not a conveyancer but it is boring when people criticise professionals when they don't understand the profession.

No, reread your first post. You were saying the transaction "couldn't have been more straightforward" and implied the enquiries being raised were a pointless delaying tactic. You only wanted to "make people smile" to have a giggle at the underpaid, overworked paralegals who mostly deal with conveyancing work.

The French and NZ systems sound intriguing.

I have bought and sold in America, where we moved to before coming to the UK. Leaving out the very high EA commission fees, the system there is also much better. The key feature is that when you make an offer you accompany it with a deposit called ‘earnest money’, 5-10% of the purchase price. You include a list of caveats for the deposit to be retained and the sale to proceed, which the seller may accept, reject, or negotiate.

Top of the list, the price is fixed and the house comes off the market. Courts take a dim view of any attempt to mess about with this and it just doesn’t happen. There is a written, legally binding timetable for all steps to the close of sale (which may be modified in emergencies). If either party violates, the other has the option to cancel the sale (with return of the deposit). Much less gentlemanly, but much more effective.

TBF, the (good) EAs work a lot harder.

I live in the US and just brought our first home....the process here is straightforward and fast, 1 month from acceptance to keys. The English system baffles me, my colleague had an offer accepted in October and he said he would be lucky to move in before May! Mind blown!

The issue is that the cost people are willing to pay for conveyancing has been driven to the ground. Therefore conveyancers have to take on 100s of cases each to make the work worthwhile which just slows everything down.

Lots of the work has been farmed out to conveyancing factories with less skilled people doing the work. All the while, the legal issues to consider are mounting up - leasehold, building safety, anti money laundering etc. It is therefore much slower as too many files and not enough time enough skilled people doing the job.

People will spend 1000s on an estate agent for some photos to be put on right
move but don’t think solicitors / conveyancers are worth the money.

There’s a lot of risk involved for conveyancers so insurance costs are high. Until it is recognised as a skill people are willing to pay for, nothing will change.

Yes, I thought you might be. Relating the hen story was intended to make people smile not berate your profession.🙄

It would be inefficient for a solicitor (or more likely, conveyancer) to look at each document as they arrive. They tend to collect them all in and then prepare their report on title. And yes, some times the title documents with the details in do take longer to arrive than the basic documents. Sometimes land registry don't have copies and you have to wait for sellers to dig around for them.

You are just showing your ignorance of the process here (am a commercial property solicitor, I do come across some bad conveyancers but your example is not a good one)

It is, but you really need to know what you are doing.
I was reading an old file at work recently and there was a frantic string of emails from someone who had paid over the odds at auction for something they didn't understand and was desperately trying to reverse it.

That's the same here after exchange of contracts. And of course it is, because the seller is incurring costs and making plans too. That's the point you become contractually bound to buy, everyone needs a point of certainty so they can book removal men, school places etc

The Scottish system is now no better than the English system

So if someone has a sudden change of circumstances i.e. death of partner, becoming too unwell to work, redundancy etc. They should be financially penalised?

Buying & selling via property auction is quicker

I have done this

Doesn't matter.
You could still sue her if she didn't ask the question.

Er, it's a house in a small market town, not a small holding. It would be completely inappropriate to keep hens, goats, pigs, ponies or any other animal which belong in a rural or semi-rural environment. And this phone call took place in week 7. How long does it take to discover a restrictive covenant? Too long, evidently.