Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To alert LA/School/Social Services

140 replies

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 15:40

Yesterday while I was doing the school run I witnessed a dad shouting horribly (and horrible things) to a poor little boy. You could hear the boy screaming from a block away. I was in a rush, and really didn't want to confront this angry man, so just kept walking with my son.

Today, I saw the same boy (I didn't see him yesterday, only heard him) but he had the most horrible black eye and the rest of his face was incredibly swollen.

I'm sure both are connected but I have no evidence. Who can I alert about this?

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Petitchat · 28/02/2025 09:26

Usedphone · 25/02/2025 15:51

Just a quick update. The safeguarding person (who happens to be the head) only replied on Sunday.

Saw the boy in question (face still a bit bruised) and his dad was there, I just noticed there was another little boy with them screaming.

At this point I don't think there's much more I can do.

Thanks for update.

Usedphone · 25/02/2025 15:51

Just a quick update. The safeguarding person (who happens to be the head) only replied on Sunday.

Saw the boy in question (face still a bit bruised) and his dad was there, I just noticed there was another little boy with them screaming.

At this point I don't think there's much more I can do.

OP posts:
boredofbirmigham · 16/02/2025 15:15

Usedphone · 16/02/2025 10:58

I did call the police FYI!

And I needed to have that call as I was heading to the airport at 1am the next day to get on a transatlantic flight.

Under any other circumstances I would have completely prioritised this, but I just couldn't disappear from work early when I was going to be unreachable for a whole week.

please dont let this slip .... call them back and ask for updates ...ss are bad but if the police is involved there are more chances that we wont read the fate of this boy in the news :(

Politygal · 16/02/2025 15:13

Report it. Experience of friends suggests it is a good thing to protect the child.

Usedphone · 16/02/2025 10:58

Mydietstartstomorrow · 16/02/2025 09:39

Hardly! I’m sorry but the OP witnessed a child being verbally abused and did nothing. (She was in a hurry). Then 24hours later she saw same child with a black eye and swollen face and prioritised a meeting over the safety of a child. Posted on here at 3.40pm instead of contacting the appropriate authorities and by the time she got round to calling the school of course they were closed she knows what time the school closed! AND HAS SHE YET CALLED THE POLICE?? That doesn’t seem to be clear from any of the updates.
if you think this is doing well check yourself. I’m astounded people know they have a duty to report this kind of abuse straight away and it’s not rocket science to who 😡

I did call the police FYI!

And I needed to have that call as I was heading to the airport at 1am the next day to get on a transatlantic flight.

Under any other circumstances I would have completely prioritised this, but I just couldn't disappear from work early when I was going to be unreachable for a whole week.

OP posts:
Mydietstartstomorrow · 16/02/2025 09:39

Petitchat · 14/02/2025 22:53

The SW hasn't passed it on to the police.

OP has done well, the SW has failed.

Hardly! I’m sorry but the OP witnessed a child being verbally abused and did nothing. (She was in a hurry). Then 24hours later she saw same child with a black eye and swollen face and prioritised a meeting over the safety of a child. Posted on here at 3.40pm instead of contacting the appropriate authorities and by the time she got round to calling the school of course they were closed she knows what time the school closed! AND HAS SHE YET CALLED THE POLICE?? That doesn’t seem to be clear from any of the updates.
if you think this is doing well check yourself. I’m astounded people know they have a duty to report this kind of abuse straight away and it’s not rocket science to who 😡

jo19 · 16/02/2025 09:09

I’m guessing school has closed for the half term holidays now. I would contact your council’s LADO (local authority designated officer) to report what you’ve seen and heard.
There is no way the school would have ignored a child coming into school with a black eye but your account of what you witnessed will help as the parents may have come up with a different explanation of how the child acquired his injury.

Spriterat · 16/02/2025 07:13

Call the police. It is the weekend and in our area it is also half term break. The police will be able to get hold of the safeguarding lead and get straight into it. Please don’t delay reporting.

Noodles1234 · 15/02/2025 21:57

poor kid, I’m so glad you’ve found a saw this.

yes speak to the school, they have a lot of safeguarding behind the scenes and they probably already know about the child, but your back up will be very handy. If you want a face to face ask to speak to the Safeguarding Lead, Head or any staff as they will direct it to the Safeguarding Team

Toptops · 15/02/2025 20:32

Please report to school and SS.
I listened to a moving item on a primary school in the north who had a brilliant caring approach to their kids. It included posting a member of staff a bit down the road to intercept any reluctant learners, battered kids etc. One such had a black eye and said they'd been hit.
It was so upsetting to hear the HT say that although they always reported such issues to SS, often they were told that they couldn't be dealt with as there were other kids in much worse situations.....

croydon15 · 15/02/2025 20:22

Chocolate85 · 14/02/2025 16:54

The message you left might not get picked up until after half term. When I’ve done Safeguarding training we’ve always been told that you need to think of what is the worst case scenario if you don’t report it? In this case, the child could be seriously harmed so you need to report it to MASH, social services, police. Do not leave it. Poor child.

Please report, remember Sara Sharif.

ThisRedLion · 15/02/2025 19:18

The police school and social services immediately

Crankyracoon · 15/02/2025 19:02

Report it is the only correct answer here.

boredofbirmigham · 15/02/2025 18:37

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 15:40

Yesterday while I was doing the school run I witnessed a dad shouting horribly (and horrible things) to a poor little boy. You could hear the boy screaming from a block away. I was in a rush, and really didn't want to confront this angry man, so just kept walking with my son.

Today, I saw the same boy (I didn't see him yesterday, only heard him) but he had the most horrible black eye and the rest of his face was incredibly swollen.

I'm sure both are connected but I have no evidence. Who can I alert about this?

school is close now for half term call the police and social services quickly! better safe than sorry and ask to be kept in the loop! too many horror stories when people see and dont report !

Single50something · 15/02/2025 18:30

Phone or email school. I witnessed a bloke having a major go at a boy (assume son) and yelling at him to get to the car. The body language was aggressive and I managed to get a photo that I sent to school. They thanked me hugely..the safeguarding lead.. and said aware of situation.
Def report.

EverythingElseIsTaken · 15/02/2025 16:00

She said "the heads are normally very good at checking their emails during holidays" almost verbatim.

I can assure that my head never looks at emails during half term and maybe only every couple of weeks in a longer holiday. Our DSL is on a short cruise right now and she is looking forward to being totally offline. I’m heading out of the country tomorrow and won’t be paying roaming charges to check emails either.

The local MASH team should be on this.

Petitchat · 14/02/2025 22:53

CatG021024 · 14/02/2025 18:30

Your attitude sums up why children slip through the net. Safeguarding is EVERYONE'S business, not just social care. All the SW could do is pass on to the Police what op has said. Op is the better source as the actual witness with some identifying info. Honestly, responses like this make me despair.

The SW hasn't passed it on to the police.

OP has done well, the SW has failed.

Hankunamatata · 14/02/2025 20:33

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 19:35

And what ask in a group if 5k is somebody knows the name of the kid with the back eye?

I did go through some of the posts from school (on tapestry) but they don't give any names

Go through posts. If you see boy screen shot, circle child and email the school

Springiscoming112 · 14/02/2025 20:22

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 16:12

I know his name and year, he went to nursery with my DS.

Yes if you know name and nursery then report to police and children services

NeverDropYourMooncup · 14/02/2025 20:01

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 19:23

Who checks the emails / voicemail out of hours though? The social worker said the head, but I'm not too sure.

As long as you sent it to the safeguarding email address and not office@, it'll be the Head and/or the Deputy Designated Safeguarding Lead. As it's a Primary school, it'll be easy for the Police to contact either of these to allow for somebody in the process of getting on a plane for a half term holiday - they always have contact details because children do end up in terrible situations in the school holidays and at night.

If you wanted to be quadruply certain, you could also email the safeguarding governor, as their email address also has to be published on the school's website in the safeguarding section/safeguarding policy document. Or even add the chair of governors, as they will be pretty much certain to have the Head's mobile number.

There is always a way to get in touch and with so many different ways, the odds of every single one failing is impossible.

Ang3leyes · 14/02/2025 19:55

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 19:35

And what ask in a group if 5k is somebody knows the name of the kid with the back eye?

I did go through some of the posts from school (on tapestry) but they don't give any names

ask if anyone knows the second name of the boy in the (enter year) as he had a black eye and you want to report it , just explain the story

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 19:35

Ang3leyes · 14/02/2025 19:31

What’s going on. Did you give the name and year to the school. Go on Facebook and try to find the boys family on there somehow if you have the time. Find the second name from there and then you have it to report. Or ask on local Facebook page anonymously ?

And what ask in a group if 5k is somebody knows the name of the kid with the back eye?

I did go through some of the posts from school (on tapestry) but they don't give any names

OP posts:
MyrtlethePurpleTurtle · 14/02/2025 19:31

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Ah, OK - thanks!

Ang3leyes · 14/02/2025 19:31

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 19:26

That's what SHE said. Which also could give the benefit of the doubt to the dad.

What’s going on. Did you give the name and year to the school. Go on Facebook and try to find the boys family on there somehow if you have the time. Find the second name from there and then you have it to report. Or ask on local Facebook page anonymously ?

Usedphone · 14/02/2025 19:26

moonsunandstars · 14/02/2025 19:23

But this is the part I don't understand....there's no way school would have ignored such extensive injuries on a child.

That's what SHE said. Which also could give the benefit of the doubt to the dad.

OP posts: