To feel upset I won’t be invited to his parents 60th?

For all the people saying a party is not the right place to meet his parents and she shouldn’t go - the party is not until summer. He has plenty of time to introduce her to them now and let them get to know each other before then, it’s strange to say you’re serious about someone but not introduce them to any family after 15 months. I’d find that rude and possibly a red flag.

Given it is a 60th anniversary, I imagine they are in their 80's. Perhaps their health isn't great and they just don't want to meet you at this point.

I think you should be invited . Ask him . And thank you for clarifying it was a 60th birthday party which I thought it would be!!

Why is everyone going on about an anniversary. I think a party is the perfect place to meet family all at once because the focus isn't on the new partner and allows them to meet every one in a less intense setting. Maybe he is presuming it would be too much for you at once. Ask him.

Edited as have just seen op has actually clarified it's not an anniversary and is a birthday party. Don't see the issue meeting people at a party at all.

Completely agree. Family gatherings to celebrate milestone occasions aren’t the time or place to introduce new girlfriends. We’re having a big family celebration for our silver wedding this year and would refuse a request to invite a new partner who we hadn’t met before. It would change the dynamic.

Nonsense. It’s a very normal thing to do. Why do posters think events “focus” on one person or another? It’s just insecurity and gaucherie. Unless OP dresses up as a llama and performs cartwheels she’s just another party guest.

You describe him as your partner.

This should be an easy conversation. "I'd love to come, how would you feel about that? ".

It could be he's assumed you don't want to.

If you ask on here, you still won't know. You'll just have a bunch of insane suggestions of why it could be.

Two very sensible posts.
The party is about them, not to introduce a new girlfriend. You would be a distraction. Of course a trip to meet his family at another time would have you centre stage, but not now.

Sure, but loads of posters on here have jumped straight to the idea that the OP attending would be making it "about her" and that the focus should be totally on the parents. I can't even imagine what a party would be like where the focus was on the hosts at all times, or even what focus means in that context.

I was with someone who kept me away from his parents. We were together for a good few years. I am quite shy so I never pushed it!
Turns out he was a compulsive liar and told his parents ridiculous lies about me including my age, where I lived, my job etc!
I'm not saying this is your situation OP, but going through this again would make me feel abit various if I'm honest!

We’re talking about a different country here though, and possibly a different culture, so it may very well have something to do with that. I agree OP should just bite the bullet and ask BF directly why she’s not invited, if she hasn’t already. But if she’s going to do that, she’ll have to be ready to accept his reasoning.

In the 15 months you have been seeing him have you actually discussed or got to the point of making any plans with his parents to meet them?

If not I would think it a bit hypocritical to have your nose out of joint for this. If not what/who is stopping it from happening?

Also 15 months in and it being a "serious relationship", not feeling comfortable to discuss your feelings honestly with him doesn't bode well.

I think you've posted on the wrong thread!

My grandparents had similar birthdays and my husband and I are almost the same. It’s not as uncommon as you think, we will be having ‘our 60th‘ 😁

Unlike your incisive contribution, eh?
Just because you disagree doesn’t mean you have to be rude…

I understand why you're upset, OP. 15 months is not by any means a brand-new girlfriend, and you would presumably meet them in the few days leading up to the party, unless you were bizarrely planning to fly in that day. Not everyone needs to be accompanied at all times by their partner in an unfamiliar situation, it's not hard to pick up a bit of the language before summer to be able to mingle with the guests, and many people are likely to speak English. Attending a party is not "making it all about you" (what does this even mean?!).

When I lived in the USA, I had a female ob/gyn & there was always a female assistant in the room. Always.

I think it’s a regulation, at least where I was living that all exams there was a female assist even if Dr. was a woman.

I don’t recall ever ever being alone with a Dr of any gender if I was being examined.

That should be the rule.

I wondered when this would be suggested. 🥱

I really don't agree with the idea that the party has to be 100% focused on the parents. That's just not what parties are like. Some of my best memories from weddings have nothing to do with the bride and groom, and at my own parties I wasn't furious if the "focus" (what does that even mean in practical terms?) wasn't on me at all times. During this (possible) anniversary party then sure, there'll be some speeches and people will congratulate the parents, but most of a party is guests talking to/dancing with each other. It's not "An Evening With..."

Bringing a GF who nobody has met before and who doesn’t speak the language would most definitely mean the focus isn’t on them.

They don’t have to be on the same day just the same year. My parents’ birthdays are within 2 months of each other.

Sounds suspect to me. Does he have a girlfriend back home as well? Does he go back home regularly?

Because they weren’t the ones who didn’t invite her ?