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AIBU?

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Original poster

Single mum 45k a year in south east but just scraping by?

214 replies

Plantball · 13/02/2025 20:05

There was a time I once thought a household income after tax of 45k meant a comfortable life. I am a single mum of two young kids in the south east. Rent alone is 18k of the money gone. I feel like I’m merely existing. Running a car, council tax, gas, electricity, food, kids clothes, shoes, clubs…

The money just doesn't go far. I know I am fortunate compared so many and I’m not pleading poverty. Just feeling very flat at never being able to better our life.

OP posts:
REDB99 · 13/02/2025 20:22

I wish there was more affordable housing, as if you weren’t paying £1500 a month on rent you’d be a lot better off.

Funykeudfh · 13/02/2025 20:22

Drearycommuter · 13/02/2025 20:20

I’m in a similar position and I’m planning on moving up north. I’d already moved out of London to a commuter place but that is now unaffordable. It’s a bit gutting to move 200 miles from friends and family but it’s the only way I can make the numbers add up. Have promised the kids a dog if we do as I feel so bad at uprooting them AGAIN.

I've heard Wigan has really nice parts that are really cheap or Newcastle.

ToKittyornottoKitty · 13/02/2025 20:22

Have you checked if you are eligable for UC? You might be with high rent, especially if you have any childcare costs

wipeywipe · 13/02/2025 20:22

There was a time I once thought a household income after tax of 45k meant a comfortable life

It's the equivalent to 36k in 2020 & 30k in 2010. Wages have stagnated.

Funykeudfh · 13/02/2025 20:21

Plantball · 13/02/2025 20:09

Not in London but Kent!

Can you move up north?

Drearycommuter · 13/02/2025 20:20

I’m in a similar position and I’m planning on moving up north. I’d already moved out of London to a commuter place but that is now unaffordable. It’s a bit gutting to move 200 miles from friends and family but it’s the only way I can make the numbers add up. Have promised the kids a dog if we do as I feel so bad at uprooting them AGAIN.

Holdonforsummer · 13/02/2025 20:18

Unfortunately I think salaries that sound decent no longer feel decent as they haven’t kept pace with costs, especially rent and childcare. So I sympathise. To be honest, £45k as a household income does not sound a lot in the SE

RhaenysRocks · 13/02/2025 20:17

I earn just over that in the NE and it's comfortable. My mortgage is half what my rent in the SE was. Depends on the situation with the dad and contact but if you can relocate, that's the answer.

toomuchfaff · 13/02/2025 20:15

£18k a year on rent is criminal. It actually should be a crime.

(unless it's a mansion and you're living it large)

babiesinthesnowflakes · 13/02/2025 20:11

Yeah I used to think 45k was a lot but it doesn’t seem to stretch very far anymore.

How old are you? Any chance you might be able to get promoted in future? Do you get any maintenance?

Undrugged · 13/02/2025 20:11

And absolutely you’re not being unreasonable about money. I think you’re doing really well to manage on that actually. I earn more but still have bugger all left each month. Kudos!

Undrugged · 13/02/2025 20:10

It’s hard to move as a single parent sometimes, if the other parent is involved and nearby …

Original poster
Plantball · 13/02/2025 20:09

Not in London but Kent!

OP posts:
Hellskitchen24 · 13/02/2025 20:07

Easiest answer ever. You need to move from London. Think of all the money you’ve spent on inflated London rent that you could have put towards a mortgage of your own.

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