Would you leave them alone overnight?

That's @CloudywMeatballs I think you're right. Eats, Shoots and Leaves...

No. They are too young to be left overnight.

If you were going out for an evening but returning after a few hours that would be fine but overnight is too long and you would be too far away. Your youngest is only 12. A 16 year old can't be fully responsible for a 12 year old sibling.

My children are 16 and 14. We will go out during the day or for an evening but not overnight. When we did go somewhere for 1 night recently their grandmother came to stay for that weekend.

That’s way too young to leave your kids alone.

I think it's the middle child who is almost 14, not the oldest who is almost 16. So they are 16, 13 and 12.

Too long away and the eldest is only 15 which is very young to be responsible for 2 siblings including a preteen for 2 entire days. A comprise idea- Youngest sleeps over with a friend. Oldest 2 at home but limit your trip to somewhere with an hour’s drive and go Saturday dinner-Sunday breakfast.

You can't leave a 16 year old in charge of a 14 and a 12 year old overnight.

This is the point. You have to be confident that each child js fine to be left on his own; it’s not fair (and a completely different kettle of fish) to leave a 16 year old in charge of younger siblings overnight (as opposed to leaving him on his own).

No, you can't leave a 16 year old in charge of a 13 year old and a 12 year old for that long.

Edited to correct the middle child's age.

Would you leave the 12yo alone overnight without their siblings?

If not... No.

A 15yo isn't mature enough to take on responsibility if the younger ones go rogue

Depends on the kids. Can you send either of the younger ones on a sleepover and leave the 2 most sensible at home.

Do they have good neighbours who can be an emergency contact?

An overnight as in you went out in the evening and came back the following morning I might consider but you're talking about 2 full days which I think is too long at their ages.

Everyone is saying 16, but it's actually a 15 yo. Which is pretty disingenuous of OP.

Wait a couple of years and you're gravy. Not now though.

The state can only prosecute for neglect if they can demonstrate that a child was put at risk. It's not automatic result of them being left alone. So, while I repeat it is not a good idea (in my opionion), it is also very unlikely to result in any police action, never mind arrest and prosecution.

No, I think three hours is too far away to be leaving a 16 year old looking after a 12 year old for the first time overnight. Far too long to get back if anything happened and they needed you. Especially when there's no family even nearby.

I also work in this area and I promise you no parent is ever going to be arrested for child neglect for leaving a 12 year old in the care of a 16 year old. Now IF something dangerous, that was also predictable and avoidable, happened to the 12 year old then it's possible the parents would be arrested but just for leaving them? Absolutely not. It's not illegal. It doesn't meet the legal definition of child neglect.

Oh my god the 16 year old could have a child and be deemed able to care for it!
i have a social worker friend and her view is if you are happy to leave your child alone and confident that they could cope then nighttime is not any worse. Things happen any time of the day.

saying that i think 3 hours away is way too far with no-one on hand. We have left our 3 last year and they were 17,15 and 13 but had someone very local on call if anything happened. Have also left older 2 when they were 16 and 14.

@Tryingtokeepgoing it’s not scaremongering, it’s reality especially if something were to happen to one of the children

No, too much responsibility for the 16 year old.

I would leave a 16 year old.

Not sure about a 16 year old in charge of 13 & 12 year old siblings. They are unlikely to have the authority needed. DS at 12 thought he knew everything about everything.

Certainly wouldn't go 3 hours away.

Leaving a child alone comes under child neglect (cruelty to a child is the crime) which is illegal - specifically leaving them alone isn’t stated as a crime but you can be arrested for child neglect. I work in this area and this is how cases like this are dealt with by police

That's a load of bollocks!

If they are sensible and you aren't going to be a million miles away -. maybe one night.? and see how it goes.

The 16 year old is old enough to join the army - they can probably babysit for a night.

I totally disagree with this. I was babysitting from 14 including overnight for other people's kids and my siblings. I was responsible then and even more so at 16. I have a 16 year old and would happily leave him in charge of relatives of that age overnight. I despair of modern teens who are babied so much and held back from their capacity by anxious parents.

One is very unlikley to be arrested for leaving a 16, 14 and 12 year old alone, since age alone does not make it illegal. That doesn't mean it's a good idea mind you, but then neither is scaremongering

No, it's not a 16 year old. It's a 15 year old looking after a 14 and 12 year old.
You are not wanting to leave them because of an emergency situation, simply because you and DH fancy a night away. Wait a few years til they are older, find a friend/organise sleepovers for them all or hire a childminder for the night (guess you don't want to pay for this though).

It's the 12 year old that scuppers it for me. In a year with a 17, 15, 13 year old, fine. I'd start off with an overnight. It can be a surprise to a teen how being without an adult at 2 am is suddenly scary.