To ask them to put the heating on,?

It’s not wasteful when you’re freezing though, you’re bloody using the heat! If they mention anything about waste you answer “so it is a waste for me to have basic level of comfort, and not be freezing my fingers off?”

Rooms in my mother's house can get as low as 9 degrees even colder.

It's fake and forced fuel poverty. I could pay for fuel but she just spares it.

I have a heater for my room and that's it now. The rest of the house is freezing. I have get the temp in my room to be somewhat ok.

Heater for your room OP.

Why can't you just ask them?

He clearly is just set in his ways and routines

speak to your mum and point out it’s not wasteful if you’re sat there! I’d not offer to pay directly but maybe offer to pay for a takeaway or activity

As it’s your mum I’d definitely be asking her to crank it up to 18/19 minimum

my MIL’s house is like this and I just go very rarely and go prepared when I do. Luckily I never have to stay over

we have a heatpump which means our house is never cold- it’s heated to a certain temperature constantly. So 19 during the day (we wfh mostly) and 16 at night. Would recommend. Mostly as it avoids arguments.

I once stayed in a freezing cold house in Scotland. The bed was near the window, which was broken, so a harsh wind blew into my room. I had to wrap a jumper around my head for the whole night for fear of my brain freezing solid.

It is awful that they haven't thought about your comfort, op. Ask them kindly to turn the heating up. If they can't keep their guests warm they shouldn't invite them to stay. You could get seriously ill. Good luck.

please look at this and show your mum.

How cold is too cold?

• Below 13° - If your home is this cold, it may increase your blood pressure and risk of cardiovascular disease.
• 14-15° - If your home is this cold, you may be diminishing your resistance to respiratory diseases.
• 18° - This is the recommended night time bedroom temperature.

I can see their logic but it’s not “wasteful”
if you’re in the house. The heating is being used, not wasted.

Can you buy them some logs which would be a greater value £££ than having the heating on for a extra few hours (which I imagine wouldn't be that many)?

You're a lot more mature than I am. I'd have had enough and left, gone home or somewhere else. I can't stand being cold.

I would just say to your mum that unfortunately you won’t be coming to stay again until it gets warmer as their house is so cold.

It’s tricky when parents have a new partner - things that you wouldn’t have thought twice about become a minefield. But you’re her daughter so either she tells her DH that she wants her house warm enough for toy, her daughter and guest, or she doesn’t, and doesn’t have guests.

My friend does this too. Every time I go round, even in the middle of winter, I dress like I'm about to hit a beach bar. I've learned the hard way, sitting there bright red in the face and absolutely sweltering in a sweater dress! She is a lovely person and great host, just likes her house to be tropical!

i do,i make fab apple pies and crumbles with them.Much nicer than shop bought..

At that temperature it won’t be long before damp spots appear. I would tackle the partner directly and tell him he has his priorities wrong. At their age comfort within their own home is the priority.

I'd be concerned that your Mum was living in a house where she didn't feel she could just turn up the heating without 'asking' as it's 'his house'.

Yes, my otherwise lovely friend, generous to a fault, heats her house to 24. I stayed just before Xmas and ended up stripping off my nighty and sleeping with just a sheet over me as I was too hot!

Close family I would defnitely ask, friends no I woundn't. This is a generational thing my parents house is freezing I tend to avoid going. When they come to us they moan it is too hot and they can't sleep as it is too hot!!

My house is currently 14. I've been working from home all day quite comfortably. I think you get used to it. No damp or mould in the house. I hate a heated house, it feels stuffy.

That little snack will work quicker than Ozempic!
I can remember visiting my dad once he had stage 4 cancer and was defrosting prawns that should have been binned… in a bowl on a radiator.
At least he’d have the heating on!

13C is cold - the house is cold and yes I feel the cold. If I could live in the tropics I'd be in 7th heaven. But I don't. I live in Britain.
I am however not cold as I am dressed appropriately for the daytime temperature in here. My heating bills are already over £4500 a year which I think is quite enough!

There's nothing I could wear that would render 13C bearable to me indoors. Are there improvements you could make to your heating/insulation so that you're cosier and spending less?

Do people even use cooking apples these days?!

Absofuckinglutely! A year's worth of apple sauce for pork and chicken, enough to make as much apple tart/crumble as I want from my tree every year. 😁

FFS, haven’t you ever seen Bramleys in the shops? Of course people use them!

As for putting a load of usable apples on the compost heap - couldn’t you have given them away elsewhere? People do make apple pies and crumbles, you know!