A reset weekend for me and my teenage son 🥹

Not sure where you live. My friend runs Hippo therapy in Wales, but this gives an overview https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/equine-assisted-therapy.html

My brother was diagnosed with Crohn's at about the same age. It's been a brutal ride with multiple operations but he's now got it under control with humira. Different drugs work for different people, but he will find something that works for him. Best of luck to both of you ❤️

I mean this gently - ask your son what HE would like to do.

Completely agree with this. Are you sure your dream isn't about getting your son back as he was before he got ill op? Because that's not going to work. Also don't spend money on a trip and then resent your son for not enjoying it. I agree you should find out what your son really wants to do. My son would enjoy virtual reality experiences, a theme park (with queue jumping) and exciting swimming with slides. Your son will obviously be different but go with what he wants and feels like doing.

What was he interested in before the diagnosis? Could you not do that together? Was going to suggest climbing a mountain together - exhilarating, lots of chats, and sense of achievement at the top - but presumably he needs ro be near toilets. How about go karting, Go Ape or zipwiring?

Best wishes to you both, OP. I would echo what others have said about needing access to a loo. Also, if your son is vaping anything that contains tobacco, he should know that it makes Crohn's worse (beyond the normal ways that tobacco is bad for you), and his medical team would advise him to stop. I really hope you have a great holiday, you sound like a lovely mum.

What about one of the cabins at Port Lympne. Not in nature for the reasons stated re lack of access to loos but near animals and an unusual but admittedly more pricey experience.

Norfolk is beautiful. Lots of things to do there. Plenty of fresh air and nature too.

The irony is… he’d probably enjoy center parks a damn sight more than what the OPwants to do

I’d really think about where he might like to go, rather than you having a nice idea which he’ll hate! My DCs would not thank you for no phone or wifi, sounds more like a punishment.

Is he into any sport? Could you go to a game or stadium tour? Or the War Museum? My ds enjoyed that. Would he want to share a room with you? Mine wouldn’t, even without the Crohns.

Is he up for going riding? I get your point but is it something he’d like? If so, maybe get a lovejy air bnb in a nice country town so you can do the horses and then back to chill.

His behavioural changes are nothing to do with the steroids! He’s been told he’s got a life changing condition, he’s young and angry about his diagnosis and rebelling against it. Being stuck in the middle of nowhere with Crohns would not be the best plan. Ask him what things he’d like to do.

Ask your son.

I can’t imagine being out in nature riding horses would be fun for someone recently diagnosed with Chrons. Just because something worked for you as a child dosnt mean it will work for him.

Tell him what you are thinking, you 2 getting away somewhere and work on ideas together.

OP says they don't want to go to center parcs, so the first response suggests going to center parcs?

When I was on a long term course of steroids - prednisolone - I wished I was dead. Even years later the memory of how bleak I felt then comes back to hit me like a tonne of bricks and can knock me for six. I was an adult. I can't imagine having had to deal with that on top of the hormone turmoil of adolescence and coming to terms with a lifelong diagnosis.
Sod the reset. Can you get him off the medication.

Also regarding any weekend away, ask him what he would like. His life has gone out of his control over the last few months. He needs to be able to be involved in any decision making.

I am now no longer prescribed oral steroids. It is on my notes. I can tolerate steroid injections and inhaled steroids. There are other ways of managing my condition (not crohns).

I’d also suggest looking at National Trust cottages - some gorgeous locations, some are in the grounds of the properties, and many are near the sea. They are very comfortable and well-equipped - perfect for a relaxing break. But I’d agree about asking your son what he’d really like to do…being somewhere beautiful but remote may not suit.

When my DS2 was disagnosed with Ulcerative Colitis he wouldn't have felt up to an active holiday, plus the possibility of pooing himself out on a trip..nope. Mine was a little older but it was a big adjustment and steroids make you feel like crap.
Getting the meds right takes time and persistance... it took us a few years to get good control, but DS2 hasn't had a big flare up for over a year now and the combo of meds he takes is working.
What would your son actually enjoy doing? I get the need to go away and escape but it has to be enjoyable for him!

It would help if you told us where in the country you are and how you’re willing to travel cos I’m sure the New Forest is beautiful but if it’s 8hours drive away it probably has less appeal!

My son was diagnosed with crohns at 14, the first year was very rough on him (well both of us) so your reset weekend sounds like a lovely idea if he's well enough.

Treatment wise it's a good thing they've stopped fucking around with steroids and put him on the good stuff (biologicals). Once they find the right drug combi for him his life should return to (near) normal quite quickly.

Mini break wise what I would do is find a stables that offer hacking for beginners and then find a hotel/airBnB near that.

Boggle Hole is the most stunning location.
Forget the tents, the lads got crohns and needs decent bathroom facilities. The national trust do lovely cottages, a number of which are off the beaten tack and WiFi free. There’s a gorgeous one at Ravenscar, you can walk across the coast to Robin Hood’s bay (past boggle hole) or down to see the seals, or another near selworthy and you could go pony trekking on exmoor, definitely also some really off the beaten track on wales. He can build a log fire and be in easy reach of the bathroom.

I was told I would have to take steroids for the rest of my life for IBD but changed my diet completely and have been in remission ever since... what has shocked me most is that the hospital consultant had zero interest in why I'm in complete remission, even when he signed me off from their care. At 13 it's not going to be as easy to change his diet but there are drug free options to explore. If I do flare again I would do what @Genevieva 's friend did using carnivore diet and slowly build my diet back up. Best of luck

Hey OP, just to say I have Ulcerative colitus, and after my diagnosis I was put on prednisolone and also reacted in a very similar way to your son -it really did give me almost instant mood swings, depression, insomnia and fits of rage. It also did not stop my UC symptoma although it did temporarily improve them slightly. I was also having to deal with the shock of having gone from the mindset that i am a completely healthy young adult and the world is pretty much my oyster to I have a long term unpleasant uncurable health condition, I can't leave a toilet, I keep having accidents through my clothes, Im in constant pain, will I lose my bowl? Will i have a stoma? Will anyone ever fancy me again? (Also having accidents in bed during sex). Work also turned against me even though I was not having any sick days other than appointments, it was a small company and I think my mistake was revealing to them what was happening (needed a day off short notice for a sigmoidscopy) as they just didnt want to support an employee that would be long term sick, they wanted me to go. So it was a whole ton mentally to deal with and I was also very depressed for about a year. Several years on I have a great supportive job who have no issue giving me time off for regular infusions, and the medication Im currently on I have no symptoms at all so live my life happily. Im married, still work,bought a house, children. Meet 70 year olds in the infusion ward who have the condition but are doing ok and have a good life still. No stoma yet. It might all go south still, but I have reached a point that I have a positive mindset and am very happy generally. They key has been finding the right medication for me, and being aware your body can adapt and you might need a new one from time to time. I now have on file how bad i react to prednisolone and they no longer prescribe me it, to do so I had to go see the right GP while i was in the middle of the prednisolone induced depression/insomnia and pretty much cry to them. But it was worth it. I went through all this at an age much greater than 13 and I can imagine that your son is struggling a lot to come to terms with and get used to the condition. You are probably also going through hell trying to support him, as my then boyfriend did. Good luck with it all. I recommend a holiday cottage (with a nice bathroom and nice bedrooms if he is tired!), perhaps in the countryside fairly close to some bigger towns. Maybe Dorset? National Trust properties are good for outside walking for me, as you can look up if they have toilets in advance and they are normally ok. Be aware if your son will struggle to hold his bowels on long drives and always have a change or two of clothea in the boot of your car, spare pants and wipes discreetly in your handbag etc. Agree with others ask him what he wants to do if possible (cinema? Bowling? Shopping?) and then go do it with him, have some time togeter but chilled. Good luck again.

@fifimummy he has been overwhelmed by this diagnosis! I think your son might be better speaking to a teenager who has the condition. at the moment, he feels like his life is over before it has begun. he is terrified. the hospital will have contact numbers of crohns help groups. that is the best place to start.

I have no firsthand experience of crohns so this isn’t advice on what you should do, it’s an anecdote you might find interesting. My friend has crohns. It’s appallingly bad. He’s been to hospital tor it numerous times. The treatment caused him to lose weight dramatically and his mental health fell off a cliff. Eventually, he went to a doctor in the United States and was prescribed a meat only diet. This has, remarkably, enabled him to live a normal life again. He can work and provide for his kids. I think he started with just lamb. No idea why. All I know is that it has worked.

What about a lovely sea front hotel when it gets a bit warmer? Still got access to toilets then

Ditto sitting on a horse.

Water is very calming. Can you have a break at the coast? Skimming stones, playing slot machines etc