To not give her a lift?

The village is great, but it's supposed to be everyone participating not taking without return, and it's supposed to be used only when you need it, not just because you cba parenting your child!

We've got a lovely village at DD's school. DH had a car problem, we sent a WhatsApp explaining, 3 parents offered DD a lift to school.

Her BFF's baby sister gets sick a lot and her Dad works weekends, so we (and other parents) have chipped in to take her to parties when her Mum can't make it.

In this situation, I would absolutely give a lift if they had asked nicely in advance, but my child isn't autistic and doesn't need a silent car.

Always used by CFers needing childcare 🙄. They may have been caught out be her CFery in the past. Society has moved on from village times - they can make their bloody village which you do not need to be part of.

Ignore all the comments. Do not be dragged into a debate or having to explain yourself to the masses.

Just say because your child is rude. End of. Good luck

I've just seen your update as missed there were more pages.

It does take a village but that rarely happens. Maybe they would like to do it then since you weren't even asked. You need to toughen up. These are not your friends. Stop caring what they think.

Jesus, the CFery of this!

"Sorry, I obviously wasn't clear in my previous message. I am not able to provide a lift for X and do not want to take him with me to the supermarket. You will need to make other arrangements."

The other parents sound nuts, is there a special reason, e.g. has this parent recently been widowed or has serious disabilities or something?

This is bonkers. What you should have done is say you are not available for any lifts, never mind ones that haven't been agreed beforehand.

edited to remove rogue comma.

A parent leaving a child without having made arrangements to get them home safely. Relying on the child to ask.

You would be reasonable in calling it a safeguarding issue. Let the child's school know before they have to deal with anything like this.

That is incredibly cheeky of them. You shouldn't have given the child a lift the first time. It was up to the organisers to contact the parents. Make an excuse like you're going to visit relatives straight afterwards. Or else everyone will think you're the bad guy.

Reply

"that's great if you are happy to give X a lift home but I am unable to".

When you get there, advise the organisers that you are not responsible for taking the child home.

Why are people so bloody entitled? It's shocking.

Just say no. Say I am not doing it end off.
How rude of them all to decide and also a bit mental.
Why can't the mum pick her up?
You have to put your autistic dd above them all. No matter what rubbish they put on WhatsApp.

The cheeky mare! Right, this is what you need to post.

I won't be giving a lift home to anyone's children. Those of you telling me I should are very welcome to volunteer instead.

Brilliant response!! 👏

No need to be rude, just truthful - that's why making excuses doesn't work - just say No it doesn't work for me. And for the other parents chipping in I'd reply to them, on the WA that there's nothing stopping them giving the child a lift home..... if they carry on sniping I'd just say "my reasons are my reasons, I don't actually owe anyone an explanation"

Put one last message in the group then ignore all talk of lifts
Point out that you were never asked,the shoving, the seat kicking and the requirement for tranquility.

and if the child us there expecting a lift? Leave.make sure another adult is still there and they know child is there.

Be firm

Cheeky fuckers the lot of them

'Don't apologise and don't explain.' Best motto ever from someone very posh I used to work with.

Cheeky or what! I’d certainly be firm to her reply so she gets the message.

Write back, this.
I am so pleased to see several parents stepping up to offer lifts.
Once again I would like to confirm under no circumstances will I be the person responsible for transporting X home.

This would piss me off so much wow. The absolute cheek of it plus it doesn’t help to have the other parents chiming in like you’re the unreasonable one. Stand firm

I'm thinking that too now. OP has disappeared.

Just say on the group chat
'hi mum of child, sorry if you assumed it was ok for me to take child home from this activity last week, but unfortunately it isn't going to work for me so last week was a one off'.

You don't need to give a reason, but if pressed just say you call in somewhere else on the way home and don't go directly past her house.

Perfect!! Then disengage from any further chat on the matter and refuse to take the child again. Especially as it sounds given the child’s behaviour, kicking your seat the whole way home - this makes for a dangerous journey where you’re unable to fully concentrate.

I can’t get over the cheek of some people. As if after a day of working, driving your child to and from a club 30 mins away you would be happy to take a random child on a food shop. I would be mortified for suggesting this. Some people just really take the piss.

This is all absolute bollocks