To not give her a lift?

So what did they say when you said you weren't 'changing your mind' as that implies you agreed to take the child?

Did you actually spell out that you were not 'changing your mind last minute, but that at NO point had CF ever actually asked you in the first place and that today you had made it VERY clear that you were not willing to do it and had pretty categorically said no!

I hope you told the group leader you hadn't changed your mind last minute... you never agreed to it in the first place and had infact already told the mother you can't! And the nerve of the other woman... she can be more understanding and drop the ladies child herself if she cares that much! What is wrong with people

"That wouldn't work for us I'm afraid"

"my daughter and I value the 1:1 time in the car"

"I'd rather not discuss it further but I'm afraid im
not able to help with lifts"

Thank you 👍. I can't imagine someone doing that nowadays.

That is so cheeky,

Dont use the group chat for this, as it’s no one else’s business & you don’t need their opinions. Message directly & say that it’s not happening. End of. The entitlement & lack of manners are massive red flags.

I had this at the beginning of the school year. Not even an offer it being reciprocal turns ( not that I wanted that). Miraculously they have now found a way to take their own child most of the time after saying that they couldn’t & their dc would miss out.

And ... that's why you shouldn't make stuff up. I hope you've made it clear that it isn't convenient.

Hope you stuck to your guns. It impacts negatively on your child, that’s the only reason you need.

Just say no you can't do it but here are 2 other fools who can help you
Cheeky fuckers all of them!

Neither women nor men should be taking a child without the parent's permission (or just because the child told them to). And certainly not leaving them somewhere that they are not even sure is the correct address.

I would be horrified if I arrived slightly late to pick my child up and found out she had gone with someone I had never even spoken to.

😲😲 Omg what a cheeky fucker!!!

@DreamingOfHotPotatoes your first mistake was making an excuse as cheeky fuckers always find a way around excuses as you discovered. I would reply to her message "@cheeky fucker no isn't fine that I can take your child shopping with with me and it is incredibly cheeky, rude and entitled to think that just because I drive past your house that I am your personal fucking taxi service especially as she didn't even ask or speak with you about it. You will not be collecting and dropping her child off ever again so she had better find another arrangement or actually take responsibilty for HER CHILD.

Stick to your guns op and if the child says you are collecting again say no you are not and have a word with the activity leader and say that this was not arranged nor discussed with you and you won't be taking her home so they will need to contact the mother. She will paint you as a nasty bitch so stay calm and point out the fact that she never spoke nor asked you but got her child to tell you that you will driving her home. She does not get to dictate to a complete stranger for what is her responsibility.

As for the other parents if they think you're being unreasonable I would reply that since it takes a village then its surely no problem for them to collect and drop the child home. You can bet they will all be shocked that you dared suggest it and make excuses themselves as to why they can't.

Nip this right in the bud OP because if you don't this entitled cheeky fucker will escalate and have you doing free childcare and god knows what else. Cheeky fuckers only get away with their behaviour because they rely on people being too polite and passive to say no along with their enablers.

How did it go @DreamingOfHotPotatoes ?

OP, how did it go today after the activity?

“If I had been asked, then I would have had the opportunity to say that it wouldn’t work for me and explain why. However no one even asked me! I have been presented with a fair accompli which is quite rude and presumptuous. Given little Sally’s behaviour on the trip home last week, I am even less inclined to help out. You will need to make other arrangements to get her to and from the club”

I'd purposefully misunderstand and send a cheery message saying "Ohhh Great! Thanks for volunteering.
@Cheekyfucker as i said i cant do this for you but Villageidiot1 and villageidiot2 have said they can will! Ill let you arrange with them directly."

If the villageidiots come back to clarify they wont do it but want you to do it...I'd send a reply like

Whatever happens....
Do not let her child into your car ever again.

No. Absolutely the right thread 😀

Perhaps the parent had already told them that it would be happening?

Either way it was on Op to say that no, she hadn't been asked & she wouldn't be giving a lift.

Love this lol

Jesus this would infuriate me.

Cheeky fucking lazy twatty twats!!!

Reply and say “No. I will not be giving lifts home. I have a SEN child and will not be taking other peoples children to my errands. Please do not ask me again”.

I’d inform the activity organisers/managers and let them know too.

Then I’d leave the group chat.

This ⬆️

I would be questioning the activity's safeguarding training as they should never have taken a child's word for that, they should have contacted the parent to confirm.

Yes, I agree. That was really my point upthread. Taking a child home in those circumstances and just to a lodger?.

This is a matter for social services.