I have the money for repairs but cannot face dealing with trades. AIBU to just live in the house as it is

God yes!

I had some renovations done a few years ago. Still recovering…. I now have a few small things that need to be done and for the time being I am just living with them as finding someone I can trust is so hard.

I tried to use a recommended tradesman once, but he was so busy that he never actually start my work.
I then reverted to finding people on checkatrade with mixed results. I must say that I ALWAYS chose tradesmen with multiples reviews, all positive. I do really try to vet them. However:

• I once had a constant leak behind my bathtub (when using the in-bath shower) because the installer didn’t bother to sit the bathtub on legs. He just let it rest on a thin wooden frame around the edge. Three plumbers came to investigate, none of them figured out the cause of the leak (but charged me for replacing the seal around the bath). In the end I figured out by myself what was going on by googling the potential reasons.
• i hired a carpenter to change my doors. A week later I had a house with no doors and damaged doorframes. I remember I was at work and I suddenly realised that something was very wrong with the carpenter as he was simply unable to complete the work. I texted him and told him to stop whatever he was doing and leave my house. He threatened to walk away with my new doors unless I paid him 😀. I’m laughing now but at the time I was so worried he’d go into a rage and smash my furniture and my appliances so I paid him.
• I hired a plumber to install a new toilet. He bought the wrong fittings so, to make it work, he suggested building a wooden pedestal on which to sit the toilet. I could have been sitting on a high throne every day, with my legs dangling, but I declined.
• i hired an electrician to install an electric extractor fan anywhere in the outside wall of my bathroom. He chose to dig the hole in the concrete lintel above the window 😂. Some hours and much dust later, he managed to make the hole.
• i hired a carpenter who did a good job, but then harassed me to date him (even though he was married).

I did get lucky when I did eventually refurbish my bathroom (no demolition of walls involved). I got a lovely team of people who did an excellent job and who were very kind. My Chinese plasterer is the hardest working person I’ve ever met, and charged me a third of what other plasterers charge. I subsequently used him to plaster my entire house.
I absolutely love my house now but omg, the refurbishment process was sooo stressful. And because of everything I’ve done to my floors, moving radiators etc, I seem to have caused a chain reaction of leaking pipes under my floorboards. Finding leaking pipes is sooooo difficult and so stressful. 😣

So you are not being unreasonable for not wanting to invest any energy in refurbishing your house.

Agree about females

I think part of the stress is caused by having to let a male stranger come into your home - it goes against everything we're used to.

Talk to your carpenter and joiner, and ask them for recommendations. They won't want to work with anyone not up to their standards so hopefully you'll find someone good.

I honestly think this is why so many men voted for Brexit - to get rid of the cheaper and better EU workmen. Now they can charge what they like for whatever they give with no guarantees.

Absolutely this. You can do pretty much everything bar gas and electrics and roofing.

not for a minute suggesting you do your own loft conversion but anything else is doable. There are youtubes for everything.

Jobs I’ve done supported by youtube include carpentry including new skirtings, building a stud wall, painting, wallpapering, refitting kitchen cupboards, plumbing in washers and dishwashers, replacing fences and gates and building an outdoor kitchen plus a couple of sheds and a woodshed.

People always tell me I’m “handy” but I’m not particularly. I’ve got a social science degree and work in an office role.

But I am diligent, hardworking and know what I don’t know, if you see what I mean.

honestly, for the smaller jobs do it yourself. It’s gratifying, cheap and will make you even more furious about the utter fecklessness of many trade.

ive just had a useless roofer who came round to quote in November 2024 and then never contacted me again, get back in touch asking if I still needed the work doing. What?? No - not if you were too fucking shit to even send a one-line text at the time saying “sorry, I’m too busy/ don’t want the job” or whatever.

Can you do the painting and skirting yourselves ? A paint pod would be good if you aren't handy some tutorials online may be beneficial start in a room you don't use as much practice makes perfect, as for tradesman. There is a site called check a trade and on there are fully approved trademan best of luck x

Did you hire during the covid years? We did as well and ended up with the worst people. I don't know what was going on with them but one guy who had done a great job of our kitchen 3 years prior absolutely f'd our bathroom and didn't know how to fix it, cost us 10k to sort out.

Since then we're hired about 30 different people and thankfully most of them have been ok, although there are some it beggars belief that they actually think their work is good. It is shitty, but you'll get through it.

I've found the best thing to do is either find one good person (easier said than done) and get recs from his contacts, or find an estate/lettings agent who has recs because they see landlords use the same people all the time.

Avoid all people on checkatrade, who have their own fancy websites, only a handful of reviews even if all good etc - they don't know what they're doing. Also a good sign is if they're only working on your job till it's done (not doing multiple people's jobs back and forth at the same time).

Yes and often the self employed ones have gone out on their own as they have no experience or can't hold down a job.

I wish there were more women in trades, I also detest having unknown men in the house to do work.

My brother and I talk about this ALL the time. he'll do plumbing, I'll do electrics, we'll both do carpentry. I'm over using tradies and I had decent builders doing my extension except where the contracted stuff out towards the end and it was awful.

Mind you next door have an unsaleable house after their extension....

I absolutely hate it too. Am currently getting wardrobes fitted. He didn't turn up Monday and no message. Eventually arranged Wednesday, I'm not expecting him to show.

Getting quotes has been a clown show. I have other work that needs doing and am dreading it.

exactly this. We have a decorator in at the moment doing staircase, recommended by a friend. We need a tiling repair done, tiler is a friend of the plumber who has done good work.

I’m with you OP

I’ve dealt with well over a dozen tradespeople in the last year, from builders to plumbers to electricians:

Recommended from local Facebook group - shit.
Recommended by friend - shit.
Got references and even rang one previous customer up - shit.
Super local guy - shit.

I can honestly say I would not recommend any of them, not necessarily because they were dishonest, just not very good at their job. No pride in their work, mistakes, you name it.

It’s utterly depressing.

Same, but I have some work on the drains that will have to be done...the contractor who built the extension took shortcuts and I've been told that taking him to court will be expensive.

God it's so fucking painful. Let's all go back to college and start the Guild of Trusted Tradeswomen, as I'm sure the majority of this is down to fuckwit men being fuckwits.

I got my bathroom done and it was really stressful. I only have one and it took over two months. But I love it now.

I’ve been fairly lucky with trades by doing lots and lots of research. I hate having people in the house so do my own painting. I’m not handy at all but just watched a couple of you tube videos and got myself paint, a step ladder, roller, dust sheets and brushes. I do it in small steps at weekends around work and small kids. It’s saved me thousands doing it myself and when I did get a pro painter in I spotted bits he’d missed, I didn’t think he did it absolutely perfectly either. I get a good finish by being really painstaking, it’s my house so I can take the time to get it right.

We learned to do most of it ourselves, it's easier than dealing with lying, unreliable tradesmen. All the information is online. I'm pouring a concrete slab for a shed tomorrow.

I'm seriously thinking of retraining as an electrician. I'd clean up, as I'm extremely organised and not a flakey pillock.

Everything in this thread echoes my experience too. Complete nightmare.

Same here.

We need a new kitchen and bathroom and the house needs a good lick of paint.

We live in a really affluent area and all the trades seem more interested in working in the fuck off mansions that are going up on land that used to be occupied by lovely 1920s and 1930s houses.

I'm going to get my shit together and start painting. Agree with the comment about all these perfect bloody houses on Instagram.

We've spent years doing our house. I've realised today that we have literally redone every room pretty much back to plaster all the way through.
Except our bedroom. I'm lay in bed thinking we should really do it but I just don't have the energy to organise it!
Maybe after the summer I will feel up to sorting it. We know good trades people it's the emptying of the room that's a faff
Maybe after the summer I'll face up to it

I’ve honestly considered spending the money on doing a trades course so I can do the work myself and not get ripped off again

Several years back there was a heating and plumbing company who had a contract with one of the HAs Their service was so shit that someone set up a fb page about it. Some young woman got into the group and started slagging off all the SH tenants. I did a search and found out she was the girlfrend of one of the heating engineers

I do almost everything in the house myself (up to pretty advanced DIY). But I can't do roof issues, leaks, plumbing (can do basic electrics) and heavy-duty work.

The thought of getting workmen in makes my blood run cold - but agree with a PP that the Eastern Europeans is probably the way to go (if I can find them).