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AIBU?

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No regrets, but would you have done this for your friend?

309 replies

farmlife2 · 11/02/2025 07:34

One of my closest friends and me go to a mother and baby group. Her DH had dropped her off and she didn't have any way of getting home. She asked me for a ride to the nearest bus stop - 3.5 miles from where we were meeting.

The issue is we had our children with us. She didn't have a car seat for her toddler. I said my concerns (safety and legality) and she said she'd sit the toddler in the foot area in the front so she wouldn't be seen. I told her I just wasn't comfortable with it and it would be my responsibility if anything happened (you just never know). Someone else did it for her, but I wonder if others would have done it for a friend?

I'm in the bad books right now but feel like a friend shouldn't ask for that kind of favour. I feel both like a terrible friend but like I did the right thing.

OP posts:
TwentyTwentyFive · 11/02/2025 07:39

Not unreasonable at all. I can't believe someone risked it and put the poor kid in the foot well.

If she can't get home without someone illegally and unsafely transporting her child she shouldn't go to the group.

farmlife2 · 11/02/2025 07:39

fourelementary · 11/02/2025 07:37

Why couldn’t she have sat in the back with toddler in the middle? Like you’d do in a taxi without a car seat? It was the toddler in the footwell that was the biggest issue for me… so you were both being unreasonable to not think of a better solution.

My back seat is full of car seats. There is no room for another adult in there. But I also don't have the taxi exemption, or whatever allows them to do that.

OP posts:
farmlife2 · 11/02/2025 07:37

Manchesterbythesea · 11/02/2025 07:36

Absolutely bizarre. Why would you get dropped somewhere with a baby with no way home?

Assumption someone would drop you at the bus stop?

It's just been preying on my mind and I hate that I was put in that position. But my mother tells me I'm too much of a stickler for rules.

OP posts:
fourelementary · 11/02/2025 07:37

Why couldn’t she have sat in the back with toddler in the middle? Like you’d do in a taxi without a car seat? It was the toddler in the footwell that was the biggest issue for me… so you were both being unreasonable to not think of a better solution.

MelisandeLongfield · 11/02/2025 07:37

How much more of a 'terrible friend' would you have felt if there'd been an accident and the child was injured or killed?

You did the right thing.

Manchesterbythesea · 11/02/2025 07:36

Absolutely bizarre. Why would you get dropped somewhere with a baby with no way home?

Zapx · 11/02/2025 07:35

Not being unreasonable. She shouldn’t have asked, it’s illegal and would have come back on you.

Candleabra · 11/02/2025 07:35

You shouldn’t feel like a terrible friend and you did the right thing.

HereNext · 11/02/2025 07:35

You did the right thing.

She's not a friend for not understanding and being mardy with you about it.