Elderly parents won't write wills or funeral plans.

It really, really isn't. Powers of Attorney are best drawn up well in advance of need. You can't give PoA if there's any loss of capacity. The process children (or whoever you would give your PoA to) have to go through to manage your affairs without one is difficult and takes a long time, meanwhile others take those decisions out of everyone's hands.

You can't know when you are going to need someone to manage your affairs suddenly and many elderly people jog along without noticing or in denial about their capabilities declining - it's only human but it causes such problems later on. People are really bad at acknowledging what is likely to happen. Everyone thinks they are in control.

Powers of Attorney in England & Wales are drawn up and lie dormant until needed, they can only be activated when you lose capacity health), or you lose capacity or give explicit permission (finance only) which can be withdrawn. I have mine already drawn up and I'm 60.

The problem with dying intestate is the that the spouse only gets the first £333k of the estate and the rest is split between spouse and any children. This can cause huge complications for the spouse left behind as they often have less than they think.
www.gov.uk/inherits-someone-dies-without-will/y/england-and-wales/yes/after-jul-2023/yes

If your parents want their estates to go to each other if one dies first, and then to you and your brother in equal shares when they are both gone, then there is no need for a will. It’s a complete waste of time. A will is only needed if you want to deviate from the standard rules of inheritance- ie leave it all to a charity or skip you and give to your brother and your children only, or have small bequests to friends etc.

As for a funeral, maybe they don’t care about a funeral. I would be proactive and say, I think a direct cremation and scattering ashes is what I would do for you. That’s their chance to object or agree and hey presto you know their wishes and can write down the outline of a plan.

Paying for a funeral gets charged to the estate, and prepaid funerals can be a total rip off anyway. I just used my credit card and got refunded the money when my mum passed away.

I am currently in the situation where my stepfather has died with no will or funeral plan and my DM is seriously ill in hospital and it seems overwhelming trying to sort everything out when the next of kin is incapacitated.
At least you'll be directly related to both 😔 but things do happen to complicate matters and it doesn't necessarily have to mean both die at the same time.
I can understand your concern OP but there's nothing you can do about it if they won't discuss or sort anything out.

@angelickaty but if the house is held as joint tenants which us the default for married couples then it won't form part of the estate and the £322k threshold will only apply to other assets. Maybe in your circle it's normal to have that level of assets on top of the marital home, in which case I agree it's worth spending on some inheritance planning if you want to avoid tax (though I am never so sure why the cats' home is a better beneficiary than the taxpayer coffers personally) but for most people it's true that the surviving spouse will inherit all in intestacy, so important to have a will if that's not what you want and you want to prefer children etc but otherwise not the end of the world.

Same boat here.

Also my parents are in Ireland and the government there has made it virtually impossible to set up POAs for them.

I think the only thing you can do is present them with a plan and ask them to pay for it.

And set up POAs for them.

Make sure they have wills. If not get a DIY will kit.

If they refuse to engage, then spell out what you will or won't be able to do when they become infirm or pass away.

I have given up trying to get my parents to make a plan for their future. The only thing I can do is be clear about my own boundaries.

No if probate is happening accounts are frozen, length of time for probate 12/18 months, but if person has funeral plan in place this pays out , funeral services will place monthly interest on bill until paid all becoming very costly, most funeral services don't take you on board until you part pay or pay infill, for this reason

No, no-one is "expected" to step in as Administrator if there's no Will. Even someone who is named as an Executor in a Will can renounce the responsibility using form PA15.

No if probate is happening accounts are frozen, length of time for probate 12/18 months, but if person has funeral plan in place this pays out , funeral services will place monthly interest on bill until paid all becoming very costly, most funeral services don't take you on board until you part pay or pay infill, for this reason

Please get them to at least do these three things:
Write a very simple DIY will leaving everything to each other. This avoids probate and funds being frozen for months.

Make sure their bank accounts are in both names so whoever survives the other can access their cash.

Get them to put aside money for a funeral,m maybe in a fund you can access, perhaps in your name, so you can pay for it easily.

You could also chat to them about their favourite songs and keep a note of ones that might be suitable. Look over old photos with them and ask for copies. Chat about best times of their lives so you have some anecdotes.

In Ireland it has recently been made on line only. Requires both parents to set up individual accounts. They both need e mail addresses, which only one of them has. They both need government system IDs which requires 2 forms of ID, with only their name on. All bills are in either my dad's name or both. The POA requires them to go to the solicitor, with the attorney, me, who does not live in Ireland. They then need to have their capacity confirmed by their GP. It is a fricking nightmare. So much easier in the UK.

I quite agree. I’m a teacher and twice I’ve had to try teach the class knowing that a child’s parent has been killed on the way to work that morning and the child didn’t yet know. In both cases the surviving parent decided to keep the children in school while they coped with the shock etc. It makes you very aware that you can die suddenly.

This is simply not true, all high street banks will pay the funeral invoice before probate.

There are a lot of immortal people around in my experience. People who would never get hit by a car for example. Loads of them. Those people don't need Wills or LPAs apparently.

Everyone else needs them. Particularly if you have children under 18. Appoint guardians in your Will and get a set of LPAs in place in case you lose capacity so your kids life isn't as disrupted as much as it would be without LPAs. Both parents might be in the same car so unless you always travel separately just get it done.

He could have relinquished the executor role - it's not compulsory to do it if you're named in a will.

My mother was and is tough as they come, and that's why she is still alive at 90 following a big stroke at 87 which has eventually robbed her of speech, mobility and mental capacity. If she had done an LPOA for health instead of just finances, we would have been able to be her voice much more effectively.

I'm 55 and finally doing my LPOA now that ds is 21. I personally felt he was too young to have it before that.

How would you pay for the funeral or wind up their affairs without a will or LPOA?

Isn't it the case that the nearest relative is expected to step in as administrator/executor if there's no will? There must be scope for them to say no, but of course what a lot of of people do is to get a solicitor to do all the work. Expensive but best solution sometimes.