He has me in tears

If you can’t get rid of this vile man for you, it is worth noting you have a parental responsibility to safeguard and prioritise your child’s needs. If this is the environment your child is living in - with an abusive alcoholic- then they are not being protected or prioritised.
Change the locks, get him out. You both deserve far better.

Op, this is absolutely vile behaviour. Do you want your child to witness this as they grow up so that they think it is normal?
Please, for your child's sake and your's get him to leave. Any near violence, phone the police.

Surely that's your answer. When he threatens to move out, show him the door, chuck his things out after him, and change the locks. You and your child will be much, much happier. Result.

Pack his bags.....................change the locks..................stop all contact!
You deserve better.

Oh, OP, he’s abusing you. Contact Women’s Aid, please.

Sending you love.

He's an abusive alcoholic. Protect your child and kick him out.

Get your friends/parents round and get him to leave. No one needs this kind of behaviour. Don't fall for emotional blackmail either. Honestly, get rid and change the locks. Have a mate stay for a few nights.

Please please leave. You don’t mention children but whatever you do don’t have any with him

Please get away from this so called man it won't change if anything it will get worse both you and your child don't deserve to be around this toxic environment you sound a lovely person who just needs to find herself I was like u Please PM me if u want

I had a friend who was in a similar situation. Her bf did coke, would come home and smash up the flat. I asked her why she stayed with him. She said she felt like she had spent so much of her life with him. Invested so much of her time and energy, she couldn’t face walking away. She didn’t want to “waste” that or admit all those years were a mistake.

A lot of people have been where you are, you are far from alone OP. My advice? Well it depends if you are ready. Ready to admit that this isn’t a healthy relationship and he isn’t your Prince Charming. Once you can admit that you’ll be able to take steps to get him out. You say he threatens to leave? Does he have anywhere he can go? This would be my starting point. Getting him out so you can have a chance to heal.

Edited to add - the photo is under review but if you have a chance today check out ‘sunk cost fallacy’. That’s what your problem is (in my opinion).

I was you some years ago. I left. I'm not so happy with three children with a man that adores me. Don't stay, it never gets better

You need to get him to leave. This is no way for you and your child to live. It’s easier said than done but you will feel such relief and liberation once he is gone.

Is he the father of your child?

Do you have someone that can be with you when you ask him to leave? Once he has left change the locks immediately! Then that will be the first day of the rest of your life free from the misery!

What a disgusting excuse of a man. Please contact women’s aid and get this man out of your life. For you, and more importantly for your child.

This is the example you're setting for your child of how a relationship should look OP. It's not good enough. For god's sake kick him out for your kid's benefit if not for your own. Don't let yourself be manipulated by an abusive drunk. You and your DC deserve better.

I know it is easy said but you need this man out of your life.
Not only has he harmed your friendships and self esteem, what will his outbursts be doing to your child? ☹️
For both of your sakes, get him out!

Get out, please get out. What a swine. Cut your losses and get out. It won't be worse, it will be liberating, don't be afraid to be on your own, and if you don't want to be on your own, surely there are better people out there. What a swine.

If it’s your house OP, tell him you’ve had enough and he needs to leave. And then follow through. He’s lowered your self esteem to rock bottom if you’re accepting this kind of abuse as the norm. You’re not married and he has no claim on your property. Kick him out and then get CMS involved so he contributes to your child. You and your child deserve much better than an abusive, alcoholic arsehole who emotionally blackmails you into getting his own way.

You don’t get a choice because you’re not only putting yourself at risk anymore, now you have to leave him for your child’s sake. You are allowing an abusive alcoholic access to your child, in your own home. It has to end, today.

Get rid of him, change the locks.

Tell him to move out! Think of your child and yourself and get rid of asap

Spitting on someone is absolutely disgusting. It shows complete contempt for the person.

It can also be assault can't it?

He tells you to stfu, calls you a cunt & a thick fuck?

There's nothing he can ever do to make up for that.

Your partner is the person that is meant to make you happy; to make you feel safe; the person you look forward to spending time with and the one to navigate through life together. What you have is none of this. Get him out. Life is too short to waste time on a moron.

Have you any family or friends who can help?

He'll start on your child eventually. Get him out, even if you need some relatives with you as backup.

he sounds horrible and abusive op. I know it’s not easy but it really is time to make him leave for you and your child’s sake.

You are wasting your life and providing an awful environment for your child. Be strong and kick him out - don’t waste another day on this poor excuse of a man.