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AIBU?

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Original poster

To be annoyed that my husband can’t handle his drink

29 replies

FishOnTheTrain · 07/02/2025 14:31

ive been with him for 10 years. He’s always been a sloppy drunk but when we were younger it was more acceptable I guess, because we were all the same!

now we’re in our 30s and he’s still binge drinking. Not really regularly but a couple of times a month. I just can’t stand him when he’s drunk. He slurs his words and is just a mess. He loses so much stuff - keys/phones/wallets etc.

last night he went out and lost his credit card. He’d already lost his debit card. so now he had no bank card and is using one of mine.

a few months ago we moved into a new place and he lost his house key within 4 days of being there.

am I just being uptight?

OP posts:
FanofLeaves · 07/02/2025 14:52

MrsSkylerWhite · 07/02/2025 14:45

Using someone else’s bank card is illegal, I think?

Not if you give them permission, surely?

Thats beyond binge drinking OP, plenty of people like a drink and don’t lose their vital possessions. Most people would have to drink an absolute skinful to get in a state to lose stuff like that on the regular.

randomchap · 07/02/2025 14:50

MrsSkylerWhite · 07/02/2025 14:45

Using someone else’s bank card is illegal, I think?

Hope not, otherwise every time I go get cash out for my elderly mum I'm breaking the law.

If your dh is drinking so much that he's losing important items etc then he has a problem.

How often does he do it?

MrsSkylerWhite · 07/02/2025 14:45

Using someone else’s bank card is illegal, I think?

5128gap · 07/02/2025 14:43

No, you're not being unreasonable. Being married to a problem drinker is awful. Embarrassing, inconvenient, puts you on edge every time there's an event involving alcohol, ruins parties, weddings, Christmas, upsets your children when you have them, and doesn't change. Sometimes even escalates so it's more frequent or the behaviour is worse. The best advice I'd give anyone is to never marry or stay with a problem drinker. However, before you get to that point you'll no doubt want to try to fix it or find a way to cope. So my suggestions would be that if he won't stop drinking then you get him to only drink when you're not around and not come back till he's sober, and that you keep an idea of the frequency you'll tolerate, and if it goes beyond that, think again.