To think that online school might be the answer

Christ no.

Unfortunately the lessons can be so boring it's a crime.
If they are suffering that much I'd also say look into other options.
I hate our huge monolithic schools full of asbestos and problems. We need more schools and smaller nicer schools where different needs can be met not smaller ones

I was just as rural as it sounds like you were. Neighbours also miles away. There were 20 children total in my local village school. But we knew all the local farmers, people would even stop their cars in the road and wind their windows down for a chat! It was a 10 minute drive to the nearest village but we still knew everyone there. I was in pony club and later young farmers and had something going on with those most days and certainly every weekend. It sounds like your parents really failed you if they allowed you to become so isolated

I have a daughter in an online school op. Feel free to DM me. Different situation as she could no longer manage in secondary mainstream ( autistic burnout). It has been a lifesaver for her.

Agree with all @SpringleDingle said, sounds like we have similar situations.

For balance, I have one in mainstream secondary too.

The thing that jumps out for me is that you WFH. How are you going to manage your time, during your working hours, if your children prove less than enthusiastic once the reality sets in? You're being paid to work for your employer, not to home school your kids. I'd have thought that realistically you'd need to be at least working part time. It won't work to assume you can park them in front of screens and largely let them get on with it.

Did you enjoy parenting through Covid, assuming they had live lessons?
That's essentially what online school is, plus the fees and subscriptions. I have worked from home alongside online school then and it was hard work - and I have self-motivated children, who actually got on with the work.

@ProfessionalPirate , not strange at all. The nearest neighbours were about half a mile away. The school I went to was tiny. The socialising was with a small set of people. The nearest village was miles away. The nearest town a car journey away. There weren't many children my age.

Socialising on a daily level was pretty much the family only. Children don't generally go 'out and about' in that sort of environment.

If your only interaction with your children is nagging them to do homework, then that's a significant problem. What happens at weekends?
Firstly, talk to your children and get them to identify the problems, and be specific. Then contact the school and discuss what's going on.
It's a big expense and commitment taking them out of school, so make sure that you take plenty of advice on this before doing it.
How rurally do you live? Do you have a network of support?.

This seems strange. I’ve lived both rurally and in cities and I would say without question the rural environments have been far more sociable, with more interaction between neighbours etc and seeing people I know all the time while I’m out and about.

If you have stress affecting you daily and you don't get proper support and coaching through it, you don't magically get resilience - in fact you get less resilient because it affects stress hormones and immunity.

My kids are in regular school but tbh I do like the idea of online school. I think it would have to suit the personality of the kid and the set up. If there's stress, anxiety and mild bullying online school could really help with all of that. Sometimes I feel kids are already in the rat race and it's be nicer to have longer not to be like that.
aI guess you could stay pretty social outside of online school too to keep friendships etc. my OH would never go for it but if he was a big advocate I would agree to it!

I know a couple of families who home ed because their DC has an autism diagnosis and wasn't coping well in mainstream school, but all of them have one parent who doesn't work and can focus on the DC. I think they need quite a lot of support during the day and I'm not sure how well that would work if you are wfh.

For those suggesting giving up after school clubs, surely those are the things kids actually enjoy. Give up trampolining for 45 extra minutes in your living room?

Most people find online learning way harder than face to face. Interaction is so much harder so it's more difficult to maintain engagement.

And my kids would have killed each other if they were at home together all day

Maybe also search Facebook for home ed groups/activities near you. It would be nice to do at least one a week - maybe a sporting group like climbing or something so they can get to know other home ed kids.

I home edded all three of mine until age 16. The years age 13-16 were my least favourite - it’s pretty stressful trying to keep them on track through GCSE’s. It’s also really expensive to pay for the exams and courses/tutoring. Mine did ok and got the GCSE’s they needed to go onto A levels/6th college then Uni. Honestly, I think they might have done better GCSE wise at school with the pressure from teachers as well and it really was a lot for me to manage and I regretted it at times. That said, it was probably better for their mental health being at home but they had a fairly strong existing network of home ed friends.
We didn’t use one online school but we used individual home ed online tutoring/support for the subjects we wanted. Mostly it worked well but it still needed a lot of input from me. That’s mostly because mine weren’t that self motivated though. Most of the courses are structured so that if you had a motivated and capable child you wouldn’t need that much parental input - there are online lessons and marked homework, resources etc.
We used Southwest Science School, Absolute Maths, Humanatees, Learntec, Art and Design Room, Homemade Education and Pastel and Smudge (pre- GCSE). I’d recommend them all and they are reasonably priced.

As a former teacher I'd say, do it. Our "education" system is a mess. It's about crowd control and teaching children to be good little worker ants for their masters.

there's no light left in their eyes any more 🙁
That is all the reason you need to explore alternatives very seriously. What better reason could there be? Seeking a life for your children in which they are happy and enthused is not tantamount to wrapping them in cotton wool, or isolating them, or destroying their resilience.

You're better off asking your question on the Home Ed board. Most people think they can imagine what home education looks like, and assume that school must be a good idea in most cases, otherwise why would school exist? There are many misconceptions about what home education is like.

There are certainly challenges to home educating in a situation such as yours. But it's well worth exploring whether those can be overcome, rather than discarding the idea out of hand. People in the home ed community will have tackled those challenges and overcome them, or perhaps will have seen friends and acquaintances tackle them unsuccessfully, so they will have some constructive ideas and reality checks for you.

You might as well seek swimming tips from the Bedouin as ask people who have never home educated for advice on whether you should take your kids out of school.

I think at the very least price up what you are suggesting (King's Interhigh or Minerva will give you an idea of prices - the Academy 21 offering also seems quite good for KS3).

Include entry fees for GCSE. Do you drive? In a couple of years' time the older one would need taking to possibly quite distant exam centres for GCSE exams.

Include in the budget suitable tech such as a printer and a laptop each if they don't already have them. Stationery, toner, supplies for e.g. art, science.

Do you have reliable broadband?

Have you definitely got no other schools? If the bus is the issue, have you considered clubbing together with other parents for a taxi or minibus? That's not uncommon in rural Kent for instance.

Year 7 and 9 - it's all about friendships, connections and learning about relationships and communication with others, navigating low level bullying and overcoming difficulties. Don't take them out or extra curricular activities, they might like the idea of a lie in and not going to school but the reality will be boring and they'll have to be very self motivated to pass any GCSEs.

Do you work from home at the same time?

I grew up in a rural environment and I think it affected my social skills.

There are so many things I'd do before I'd pull them out of normal life and sign up to online schooling.

As you WFH, I would genuinely consider a house move, even a major one, before I'd give up on my kids having a normal social life and school experience.

Travelling 1.5hrs to and from school does sound miserable. They aren't happy there and there's not a strong reason to stay. That doesn't mean you park the idea of school altogether.

If you move, they will learn they can make changes and life can be okay. They'll learn socialising, good and bad, and know you listen to them.

If you online school they'll learn to hide from the world if it makes them uncomfortable, become more insular and removed from the normal teen experience than they already are living remotely.