Secondary pupil not allowed to wait in reception

Am I missing something? If the receptionist isn't "qualified" to watch dd why is the library a safe place to be?
She's being a jobsworth. Maybe have a word with teacher or whoever deals with pupils.

Well, you can't just leave them there until it's convenient for one of you to collect them!! You'll need to make other arrangements

Get the phone situation sorted out and tell her to wait in the library where she can be warm and can maybe begin (or perhaps even finish) her homework. She can have her phone on silent and in front of her

DH can phone her when he has arrived and is waiting. That's how I worked things when having to collect my secondary school children from clubs. School did have a phones out of sight in bags rule, but didn't enforce it after school when they were trying to get everyone picked up and off the premises.

She really does need to learn to get herself more independently to and from school though. This arrangement probably won't be sustainable for very much longer although I know it can be a leap of faith. It's one of many that you will have to take over the coming years though, like when/if she learns to drive.

Is everyone ignore the fact that at this school, children ARE allowed to wait in reception?

Buy her a cheap watch, tell her to start her prep in the library and go out to meet her dad at the agreed time.

School need to know who is still on site. If she is at a point that is officially open - the library - then staff will have a register of who is in and who has left. If she is just hovering in reception then there is nobody monitoring that.

she has the option of the library so she either uses that and uses a clock to watch the time or she waits outside.

If you want to pick a child up from school, be on time like everyone else. If you can’t be on time, make other arrangements, also like everyone else.

Since there’s an option of staying in the library then surely that’s where she’s meant to stay and wait, not at the reception. I don’t know how you think her waiting in reception is reasonable.
If she has no phone then you tell her to go to the library for 30 mins and come and meet her dad at the car park. Your DH will be there earlier and will wait for her in the car. She would get to do her homework, etc as well.

Just pick her up from the library or let her walk home.

Reception isn't childcare. If she's staying in school, then school offers study or extra-curricular, so that's your options.

How do you live from the school? If within 30 mins, she'd probably find that if she walked home, she'd start chatting to others doing the route and could walk with them.

This is a secondary school. They do not provide supervision for kids after school generally. The reception is not for kids to wait for parents. It is for parents, visitors and staff. There is usually a student entrance. If she is allowed in the library she should wait there. Your dh can text her when he is outside.

I find it hard to believe that a secondary school student can't manage road safety as a pedestrian.

I understand what you mean about it being difficult to make her own way home. There’s no public buses that go from our home to school (or back again). To walk would be at least 40 minutes and involve walking on an unsafe road for part of it (literally on the road) so ‘just walk’ isn’t always an option.

That said, it’s sounds like she does need to move back to the library to wait.

I think that the receptionist needs to be clear. Either there is a system where she can wait there or not. It is strange that some receptionists don’t have an issue while she does.

I think the best place would be for her to wait in the library.

Maybe have a discussion with one of the receptionist that does not have an issue about this and find out what the actual policy is.

I hate situations which are unclear and people make passive aggressive digs. I would rather know what the rules are. this current setup just sounds stressful for everyone.

Of course she can’t remain on school premises for 30 minutes after school finish time.
Your actual problem is a secondary aged child who isn’t “sensible” enough to make her own way home!

She needs to go to the library (and have the phone sorted out)

Are there additional needs involved? It's otherwise rather concerning that a 12 year old can't safely manage to walk home from the way the context is phrased (i.e. not mentioning very rural roads lacking in paths where you wouldn't expect someone to walk safely)

I pick DS1 (and therefore DS2 up) because DS1 is prone to autistic overwhelm and has limited capacity to cope with the bus regularly. The school traffic is bedlam, so I pick them up 10 mins walk away from the school in a calmer area with parking where I'm not contributing to traffic chaos; the benefit to them is that they're using some independence skills every day, and it's less of a shock on bus days.

Working on road safety? I was walking to school by myself or with siblings at half your child’s age. Can’t you fix her phone, or have her go the car park at a certain time?

She shouldn't be in reception daily if there's a fire etc no one would be responsible for her.
My friends son was not able to safely walk home (combination of ASN and busy city roads) so she had to give him money and tell him to wait in a coffee shop nearby on the days she worked

If they are allowed to remain on site in the library, spending 30mins there would be more productive/comfortable than the current set up.

also the traffic is mayhem because too many parents drive their kids to school.

Might be helpful for your DH to talk to the receptionist next time your DD gets quizzed and ask if there is a policy reason she shouldn’t be there (there may be!).

But from your description, to me this sounds more like one receptionist who just doesn’t like having the pupils around. DD should just continue to wait there unless she has somewhere better to go unless she is specifically told otherwise (at which point, a request for accommodation might be reasonable, especially if she has any SEN).

15 min Per day

PS . If she can't walk safely, have you applied for DLA.

As long as there is a clock in the library then she doesn't need a phone. If her dad is picking her up at 3.45 every day then she just walks to reception at 3.40. Or better still, goes out to meet her dad where he parks.

I have to pay £100 per month for 15 mins in after school club.Yabu.Cough up if your dc aren't able to walk home alone.

I have a SEN 11 year old and she walks 1.5 miles home and we live in a city.
I pick her up if she'd be walking home alone though as it's such a long walk for a kid.