Secondary pupil not allowed to wait in reception

Does she have additional needs? By 12 she should be able to travel to & from school independently.

The point is there is, like in my school, a library that is open at the time OP's DD needs to be indoors. Usually libraries are a fair bit bigger than reception, they don't have parents coming in who may be having an after school meeting with the head teacher (for example), the librarians won't be taking calls that could be confidential and the librarians are used to keeping an eye on students - it's part of their job every day.

Plus, as a few people have pointed out, if OP's DD is allowed to sit there because she's busted her phone then other kids will start doing the same. How do you propose stopping other kids from hanging around in reception if one is allowed to get away with it just because she and her dad can't agree a pick up time? Easiest way is for dad to say 'I'll meet you at 4pm' knowing he may get there early. Then he just waits for 10 to 15 minutes.

Our school library is open from 8.15am to 4.30pm to allow those kids who get dropped early or picked up late to have somewhere safe and warm to go. Reception have a different job to do.

They DO need to be in designated spots.

This is what safeguarding is all about. They can’t be left unsupervised.

Our school wouldn't allow it either kids need to leave the site or go the library. You naturally are only thinking it is OK as it is only your child, if 10 parents think the same thing it starts to get busy and then one of two kids are there later and later. The the receptionist is trying to close up etc. She has made a gentle suggestion please listen to it.

Exactly. I think sometimes people think schools are the same when they were there c1988, (or whenever).

Times have changed.
They are not allowed to hang around unsupervised after school finishes. They have to leave the building at the end of the school day, or be accounted for at an after-school club or in the library.
We report students who are still on the premises and contact home.

The reception area is not for children to wait after school. That's why there is a problem with her waiting there. If children want to stay in school they can wait in the library or (probably) go to after school clubs. They can't stay in any old random place just because they want to. OP's DD might be perfectly behaved, but the school can't start making different rules for everyone.

My DC's school states something along the lines of " Students are expected to leave school prompty after <school finishing time> unless they are working in the library, or attending an after school club. All students must leave school by <school closing time>". I'd be suprised if OP's school doesn't have a similar rule.

I think people are being weird about this. We used to hang around reception a bit sometimes after school, if parents delayed for some reason (we went to the school a town over, not our local). Just reading our books or chatting. Kids are hardly supervised anyway at secondary school, reception doesn't need to be manned. Kids could be anywhere! They don't need to be in a designated spot in my experience and actually reception is one of the less disruptive places because its often cleaned last.

There is a problem with her waiting in Reception for half an hour. That's not what it's there for, and the staff shouldn't have responsibility. This has all been said upthread several times.
She goes to do some work in the library, or she learns to get herself home.

I honestly don't see the problem in her waiting in reception, assuming that she isnt preventing the staff from leaving. Admin staff probably work til later than school finishing times anyway? It's not like shes behaving badly or being disruptive. Prob just sat quietly waiting. Op, I would just call in at the reception desk when you're there next, or your dh, and check with them if it's a problem. They'll either say yes or no. I live near a school, and judging by cars parked there atv3 o'clock, most pupils get taxied home rather than walk or bus.

Why can the father not do the pick ups the opposite way round and put the primary child in after school club for the time?

The receptionist lets people into school, answers phones, speaks to adult, passes messages on. They are not there to supervise children. The librarian works in the library where children are and after school are often homework clubs supervised by the librarian. Their job roles are entirely different. Would you expect the care taker to also supervise children until they can be picked up if you take your approach?

The receptionist has her own work to get on with. At my last, a big inner city girls' school, the receptionists were always very busy up until 4 p.m. with the myriad of administrative tasks that is their lot. Kids hanging about with nothing to do must be distracting and annoying. Baby-sitting is not part of their job description, especially with the confidential matters of parents and carers coming in for after-school appointments with staff and SLT. As everyone else has said, the library is warm and supervised and she can get on with homework. But most 12 year olds are sufficiently savvy to find their own way home.

Your DD needs to go to the library or an afterschool club.

Once upon a time I taught in a private preschool and learned quickly that parents tend to be willingly oblivious to scaling issues - they refuse to think about whether what they’re asking/expecting would work if every student/family who wanted was allowed. If the answer is to that is no then it just can’t be allowed for anyone unless there are genuine, specific reasons that that student or family requires special accommodations (to be clear, your DH needing to pick up siblings and your DD breaking her phone are definitely not that). The reason reception is always empty of other students when your DH arrives is that they’ve all gone to the library or after school activities like they’re supposed to, because reception can’t have a bunch of students loitering about with no record or supervision.

She probably wants all the kids out so she can go home!

it’s usual for kids of secondary age to either walk or get public transport. If you’re rural and your catchment school is more than 3 miles away the council have to provide a bus. Are you more than 3 miles from the school? Does she have to walk down country roads with no pavements? If it’s just town streets then I don’t know why she can’t walk. Surely other kids will be walking in the same direction and manage to get home ok? Does she have friends she can walk with?

it does seem a bit unreasonable to expect school to babysit your secondary age dd for free because you’re anxious about her doing the normal thing for kids of her age to do.

I work in a school and it’s fine for students to wait in reception for their scheduled school buses that all depart by 16.15, if a pupil misses a bus and has to wait for a parent then they have to be supervised by the member of SLT on duty, it couldn’t possibly be a regular occurrence that a student is waiting unsupervised in reception regularly, staff have to get home/pick up their own children too. If her phone is broken then get it fixed so she can wait in the library? Is the library open? Staff can’t just leave her so you not being able to get to her on time isn’t their issue, you’re tagging an extra half an hour onto someone’s day which isn’t really fair

Our reception area is open and students would be able to hear staff answer telephone calls. It isn’t an appropriate place for students to wait. The receptionist is right.

If school finishes at 3.15 you are expecting them to provide half an hour of childcare, effectively. Your daughter needs to go to a club, which will be run by an adult or be somewhere like the Library, which I am also assuming is supervised by adults at that time of day. At present, there is nobody designated to safeguard her at all. The office staff are not employed to do that (and probably not covered either) and there will be all sorts of additional people entering the building like cleaners, contractors etc.

Schools are there to teach the next generation, not for receptionists on less than minimum wage equivalent due to being TTO/part time to facilitate a fully grown man's preferred routine by supervising his eldest child for free - and very likely at 3.45 just as likely nearer 4pm after her finish time.

is her phone still broken? if so, why? You can buy a cheap nokia 3330 knock off for £10 that'll take a sim for calls/texts.

Perhaps you could pick her up op or pay a childminder to pick her up that way she won't be picked up late every day.

Another vote for she gets herself home. Absolute madness to be babying her like this. I'm not surprised she can't wait in reception. That's for visitors not pupils.

b) after school time, school is not geared to be responsible for her. As much as you can say she is old enough to wait by herself, practically if she did take ill or something on the school site, school would be responsible for her.

if she’s old enough and mature enough to wait by herself and not need an adult….. she’s old enough and mature enough to get herself home or to the younger siblings school.

Schools are there to care for the next generation

Absolutely. All school receptionists should offer to look after any children both before and after school if that's what their parents want. They should feed them, clean their teeth and help them do their homework as well.

Not.

Just because Reception is empty at 3:45, it doesn’t mean that it wasn’t busy at 3:15pm. You’re saying that it’s unsafe for your child to leave the school so it suggests that your dd needs to be supervised and if Reception is small and crowded then that may be difficult for the receptionist.

The suggestion to wait in the library is very reasonable. It’s only half an hour and it’s a good chance for dd to get some homework done. I suspect that the receptionist isn’t paid after 3:15 so your dd waiting there prevents her leaving.