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AIBU?

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AIBU to be annoyed at DH missing family event?

355 replies

Chunkychips23 · 06/02/2025 08:40

It’s my mums birthday lunch coming up, which has been booked in for a while. DH has been offered free tickets for a sporting event at the weekend. It comes with all the bells and whistles and he is super passionate about it. He wants to miss my mums birthday lunch.

Ordinarily I wouldn’t be bothered, but it means lugging our 14 month old on the train and then into a taxi. Again, not that big a deal, but I’m heavily pregnant and struggling with tiredness, sciatica pain and lifting heavy things atm. I’ve tried lifting DC in the car seat as practice and I’m really struggling.

I have checked with those in attendance and nobody has space in their cars for us, so it would definitely be a taxi job. DC HATES being in the car seat also, so there’s going to be that fun to deal with too 😅

DH said it’s my own fault for not learning to drive and then I wouldn’t have this problem. Or my my family should try and accommodate me. He’s saying I can tell him not to go, but he knows full well I have never and will never be that person. I’ve explained what I’d be struggling with and my concerns. I get how much the sporting event means to him. There’s a long family tradition there and it makes him feel closer to his deceased father. So I don’t want to tell him not to go.

He is a hands on father generally and does his fair share of parenting, so it’s not like he’s skipping out after being useless.

My mum has done a lot for us too. Plus my side of the family rarely have gatherings. I know she’s disappointed too but won’t express it. I have to go to all of his family gatherings, know matter what. Or his mum gets upset and then I get grief about it.

DH doesn’t think I have a right to be annoyed or feel let down. I can just ask strangers to help me, it’s not a big deal. I feel bad about being pissed off, as in the grand scheme of things it’s not a massive deal. Am I just being hormonal? AIBU here as it is something he wouldn’t ordinarily be able to afford to go to?

OP posts:
Originblueberry · 06/02/2025 08:48

This reply has been deleted

This has been deleted by MNHQ for breaking our Talk Guidelines.

nocoolnamesleft · 06/02/2025 08:47

VeterinaryCareAssistant · 06/02/2025 08:46

You don't need a car seat in a taxi.

Taxis crash too.

VeterinaryCareAssistant · 06/02/2025 08:46

You don't need a car seat in a taxi.

hello261 · 06/02/2025 08:44

Yes id pissed off too but given the circumstances could you not explain to your mum and take her for lunch or invite her over another day. Alternatively ask your partner to get his in laws to take your 14 month old so you could go alone for lunch?

CatherinedeBourgh · 06/02/2025 08:43

Can't he drive you to your mum's before and pick you up after?

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