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Original poster

Possible final straw with DH

292 replies

BestMumAva · 05/02/2025 16:14

I have name changed for this because I'm so embarrassed.

My DH went out with the lads last night, i don't know what time he got in as I was already asleep. This morning my alarm went off for work and I noticed the room smelt absolutely foul. I couldn't work out where it was coming from at first and thought the dog had messed in the house. I pulled the covers back and to my absolute horror, DH had fallen asleep next to me with no pants on and the bed was filled with what I can only describe as fecal confetti. I was absolutely repulsed and really really upset that he had got himself into such a state that this could happen.
As if things couldn't get any worse, the bathroom looked like it had been pebble-dashed - up the walls, over the edge of the bath, on the towels. I'm disgusted by him.
I didnt clean it up and he was still comatose when i left for work. He has texted me around midday wishing me a good day at work as if nothing has happened.
I don't want to go home and i don't even know where to begin discussing this with him,
WIBU to stay at a friend's tonight?

OP posts:
Tiddlywinkly · 05/02/2025 17:37

To not even acknowledge it, either 😮

Tiddlywinkly · 05/02/2025 17:36

CoffeeCakeAndALattePlease · 05/02/2025 17:29

That’s grim.

As an isolated incident I’d return home once I knew he’d cleaned up, with a conversation about it never being repeated.

As a repeat incident? I’d be seriously considering my options.

Agree with this.

Something tells me this isn't an isolated incident.

AnonymousBleep · 05/02/2025 17:34

Well, this is incredibly rank. Trainspotting is live and well in the 2020s.

OP I hope you asked your OH straightaway if he'd cleaned up all his shit?

ItGhoul · 05/02/2025 17:33

OP, I strongly suspect that alcohol was not the only substance your husband consumed if he had such explosive diarrhoea that it was spattered all over the bathroom.

Justgorgeous · 05/02/2025 17:33

I wouldn’t want any of it washed. All in the bin and replaced.

MrsWinkly · 05/02/2025 17:32

I take it he hasn't even mentioned it? All day?
It's too disgusting that someone would think crapping everywhere didn't even warrant an apology (as a minimum)...
Sorry but he's beyond hope OP, get out whilst you can.

ItGhoul · 05/02/2025 17:31

Ilikeadrink14 · 05/02/2025 17:22

You don’t want children because ‘you don’t want to clean up after them’?? What are you like??

Show quote history

Some people don't like the chaos and mess that kids bring.

It is perfectly reasonable to decide not to have children because you would hate doing things that are an inevitable consequence of that. People can decide not to have kids for any reason at all; there's no 'wrong' reason to decide against having children.

Msmoonpie · 05/02/2025 17:30

It’s one of these thread where I hope very much that it’s not real.

One because of the husband and 2. Because this only might be the final straw - which means there was other stuff too. So for the OP I hope it’s not true.

BruceAndNosh · 05/02/2025 17:30

He's hoping you didn't notice.
As if.

Saggyknickers · 05/02/2025 17:30

Oh wow, just realised the typo as I pressed post 😆 🫢

Saggyknickers · 05/02/2025 17:29

Unless the bed has rubber shits I'd be making him pay for a new mattress too.

BunnyLake · 05/02/2025 17:29

RoomtownBat · 05/02/2025 17:18

Is this a thing? 😱 God, I must have led a quiet life! So all the famous coke-head rock stars and film stars are dirty bed-poopers?
Bloody hell…

Show quote history

You think you’ve led a quiet life, I honestly thought it was referring to coca cola 😂

CoffeeCakeAndALattePlease · 05/02/2025 17:29

That’s grim.

As an isolated incident I’d return home once I knew he’d cleaned up, with a conversation about it never being repeated.

As a repeat incident? I’d be seriously considering my options.

Hotflushesandchilblains · 05/02/2025 17:27

I would be replying that I was staying away until he 1. told you he has cleared up and made the house sanitary, 2. apologised that you saw that, and 3. had confirmed his plan to never do this again.

Madamecholetsbonnet · 05/02/2025 17:27

You say it’s the final straw, so clearly this isn’t an isolated incident in a marriage otherwise full of kind, loving and respectful behaviour.

Can you make plans to split up?

sixtyandfabulousofcourse · 05/02/2025 17:26

It would be bye bye time for me
btw was there not a poster who said about her OH who shite all over the carpets was a long ongoing post about cleaning carpets etc dont know if she stayed or not

shellyleppard · 05/02/2025 17:24

See I'm curious why its only a possible final straw??? I would be kicking him out for that

caffelattetogo · 05/02/2025 17:22

That's awful. You poor thing, You deserve so much better.

RudbekiasAreSun · 05/02/2025 17:22

Men who go out and drink with mates are a turn off anyway - never bother with such, ladies

Ilikeadrink14 · 05/02/2025 17:22

Msmoonpie · 05/02/2025 16:17

Fuck me that would be it for me.

Personally because I don’t have children because I don’t want to clean up after them. No fucking way would I be dealing with a man who shits all over the house.

You don’t want children because ‘you don’t want to clean up after them’?? What are you like??

LivingLaVidaBabyShower · 05/02/2025 17:20

If the giant shit fest didnt tip me over the edge. This would 💯

He has texted me around midday wishing me a good day at work as if nothing has happened.

Argghhhhhh
Only a man would send a message this ridiculous.
Short of a total revelation and home-time miracle (I cant even imagine what that would look like / need to be... probably impossible) i dont think i could continue the relationship

Nationsss · 05/02/2025 17:19

So beyond grim.
Be glad you don't have children.

I wouldn't ever sleep in that bed again and I certainly wouldn't ever want someone so foul touching me again.

If you have an ounce of sense you are done.

Pity you didn't take a picture and send it to his family/friends....it would explain the marriage ending without further a do.

Hankunamatata · 05/02/2025 17:19

Op a bit of warning. Omg that's gross

Huckyfell · 05/02/2025 17:18

I think if this was a one off, completely out of character and not ever happened before then you need to go home and read him the riot act, he should be feeling like a worm.
If it isn't the first time then it is a whole different story. He needs to come begging and be promising some real life changes. or...

RoomtownBat · 05/02/2025 17:18

CaptainAwkward · 05/02/2025 16:30

Yeah, coke diarrhoea was my thinking too 🤢

Show quote history

Is this a thing? 😱 God, I must have led a quiet life! So all the famous coke-head rock stars and film stars are dirty bed-poopers?
Bloody hell…

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