Friend earns as much as me on benefits

This happened to me many years ago when I discovered colleagues were getting much more than me while they worked 16 hours a week to my full time hours not going to lie I was very cross!

A-lot of the private rentals a squalor were the landlords do sfa because they know how desperate people are for a roof over their head.

Well said.

The fact so many women on here are judging most probably very vulnerable and unfortunate people speaks volumes.

So many out of touch people on here showing their privilege.

Disgusting.

But, as already said on this thread - the wheels come off the gravy train. The kids grow up and the benefits dry up.

Oh and where we live, 2k is about the standard for what you'll be topped up to. It's equivalent to around £30k full time salary.

I hear you. I was seriously comfortable on benefits. I then went back to work and there was a stretch where I took home less. (Complicated by buying a flat in the meantime).

Single parents who rent and don't work are better off than single parents who own and work full time.

"Most jobs are taken by migrants"

Any evidence for that?

Oh and to clarify, my son also has an EHCP (he is in a private school as wouldn't cope in large state sector classes), has diagnoses coming out of his ears, and is also medicated. I did not say he's just a bit quirky - he is a disabled child. However, to many of my friends, they don't see the disability - they just think he's a bit quirky. The point I'm making is that the OP has no idea if one of her friend's children is disabled and is therefore getting DLA. My own friends likely have no idea that we do, or even that my son has a disability.

That was my thought. She'd be looking at donor eggs, probably abroad.

How can she afford the IVF, there's no way the NHS would fund a 48 especially when they're single and already a parent.

This. There are different levels for DLA. And you can choose what you spent it on. My son's pays for things like a clinical psychaitrist for instance.

What about the two fathers of the three children, where are they in this scenario? Did they abandon your SiL?

Ye, especially by the time they are in their late 40s, a lot of people have maxed out their career progression.

I feel like there are an awful lot of people who are in certain sorts of corporate business jobs who have no clue how most sectors actually are.

If this is true and your friend is in the same or similar circs to you (no disabled kids, no additional needs etc) the answer is for you to move onto benefits yourself. Then you’ll see who’ll have it easier.

And often that means there is a shortfall the tenant needs to make up dependant on area of choice or living. Agree very unfortunate for those living in expensive areas, I am hit with this problem

It's entirely up to you what you use the payment for. It depends on care needs and anything else which would benefit the child and their quality of life. It isn't limited to those who need physical adaptations to their home or outside carers etc. It can be used for equipment like toys or gadgets, classes/therapy sessions, trips or activities the child might enjoy. If your child requires overnight care from yourself, they could very likely qualify for high rate DLA and this can open the door to more financial assistance. It's worth applying but I would advise getting help to fill in the forms. There are many charities and organisations who can help with this.

Yes I get that but think it's harsh blaming the private landlords which are the ones keeping people in homes due to selling off of other options. Market rent is actually the rent. Landlords just match rent to area and their mortgage payments which aren't cheap.

My DS is diagnosed autistic and has the full spectrum of ADHD, OCD and anxiety. He has an EHCP and is heavily medicated. He is very clearly ND, not ‘a bit quirky’. It never even occurred to me that it might be possible to claim benefits for this. What exactly would it pay for?

I thought DLA was for people with severe disabilities who required expensive care and adaptations.

There's Information missing. We don't know how long she's been on benefits, if she's ever worked or if she had a husband who worked, and if so, how much tax and NI they paid. The latter two would mean that she HAS "earned" it. She will have paid into the system so should be allowed to claim her due if it's needed.... Also, no one, not even a "close friend" knows everything there is to know about another person; what they've been through, what they're experiencing or what their full financial situation is!

I suppose though, we live in an economy where the expectation is two incomes are required to support a family. So two ft incomes for one household. Prices, particularly around housing, have risen to meet that model.

As soon as that family model fails, because of divorce, death, or maybe there was never a father involved, whatever - all of a sudden there is one income - and how could the two income model work? If the one income is on the higher side it's possible to live as you are two people in a lower wage bracket. But with a low income, and one job, there is no way it can really be enough.

Ummmm...
Just musing...
Can you name change on posts..

Wonder if the poster has also name changed and is having a full on vent against posters that are agreeing with the original post.

Yes exactly so landlords charge going rate for area, benefits will only cover a going rate, so landlords generally if wanting to attract renters have to match rate or similar

Benefits will only cover the local housing allowance. The landlord will charge the market rent which is usually much higher. We have a housing crisis in this country, landlords do not need to do much to "attract renters" other than put their house on the renters market. There's no incentive for a landlord to offer their house for market at a cheaper rate to benefit claimants.

If you look at the post quoted by the poster you are quoting, I gave an example of the discrepancy, which in my area is over £400 pcm.

@NattyFinch I had a friend who worked locally part time in a Dr's reception and could pick up her dcs from school every day and was quids in while I held on to my ft with a 2 hours commute and at times travelling. All childminding cost money. I did get expenses but she had the quality of life in addition to life expenses paid by the government.
But I had a mortgage to pay while friend was paying rent.
I own my house now.
Depends on your strengths I suppose.

My sister is law is on benefits, single mother with children and she was being hounded to get a job or lose her benefits ! She works part time now.
But they were really gunning for her. Why don’t others get this too ?

Its annoying if its true. I think the 48 year old wouldn't be advised to have IVF. However I had a friend who already had 3 kids and had twins at 51 via IVF in Poland for very little money.