Page 18 | DD demanding chocolate when she's on her period

Homeymum2 · 2025-02-04T16:35:53+00:00

My 14 yo DD insists that all her friends parents buy them chocolates and pamper them when they are cycling - I'm being told I'm a terrible mum and badgered for chocolates Am I an outlier to not cater to this?

BunnyLake · 04/02/2025 17:56

So is there a reason why you won’t buy her chocolate? Any reason is a good enough reason in my books to have chocolate. Sounds rather joyless of you.

Maboscelar · 04/02/2025 17:56

I eat my own bodyweight in chocolate when I'm on. DD does too. Everyone in this house knows that day one of a period is for lying on the sofa eating chocolate. Just buy her some!

StormyPotatoes · 04/02/2025 17:55

My lovely DH supplies me with chocolate, hot water bottles and wine if I fancy it. It’s just being kind to your loved ones.

Just pick her up a chocolate bar and a £1 face mask. It’s just showing a little consideration for others and just maybe she can model how she treats others based on how you treat her.

Trolllol · 04/02/2025 17:54

Some people see affection in the action of giving gifts. More talked about with romantic partners but connection takes many forms. It would be a nice gesture to show you care about her needs.

Rocksaltrita · 04/02/2025 17:53

I don’t think a little TLC and understanding would go amiss, but I’m not one to link food with rewards or to comfort eat. I’d rather run her a nice bath, scented candles, relaxation-centered stuff and painkillers than stuffing her full of chocolate. Some in moderation maybe, or her favorite dinner, but I wouldn’t be peddling the message that period equals junk food outright.

Dweetfidilove · 04/02/2025 17:53

Hopper123 · 04/02/2025 16:45

It's a tik token thing where mums make them whole boards of snacks and treats with cooling pads etc it's so OTT I imagine that's what she's demanding?? I wouldn't donthat I'd simply get a big bar of dairy milk in tell her to help herself there's some in the cupboard and pass her over the box of ibuprofen if she needs it. I'm all for understanding it sucks especially if it's new to her but she also has to understand she's just got to get on with it, obviously might be a bit different if she has pain as bad as endometriosis etc but if it's just normal heavy periods I'm afraid it's a case of suck it up. We'd all love a day off and pampering but it doesn't happen in the real world

Sweet Jesus 🙄. This does sound rather OTT.
Chocolate and hot water bottle is surely sufficient.

SemperIdem · 04/02/2025 17:52

Spicycake · 04/02/2025 17:27

Yes, you do crave chocolate when you have your period. Why are you denying her this

What, every single woman?

NiftyKoala · 04/02/2025 17:51

JandamiHash · 04/02/2025 16:37

FGS OP it’s chocolate not crack cocaine. Why won’t you buy her any?

My mom always had some in the house. Now I do that for my daughter. Couldn't you get some mini bars to give?

Globusmedia · 04/02/2025 17:51

RampantIvy · 04/02/2025 17:47

No. We don't keep chocolate in the house as a rule.

Maybe we are the weird ones 😁

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This whole thread is making me feel like a massive weirdo.

I never have chocolate just in the house
I've never craved chocolate on my period
I would never have told my parents when I was on my period
I didn't realise 14 year olds couldn't buy themselves chocolate or run a bath
I wouldn't find it romantic if my husband was fussing over me while I was on my period

WattleTyler · 04/02/2025 17:51

We never have chocolate or biscuits in the house…but why can’t she buy her own if she wants it?

Gizmo1983 · 04/02/2025 17:50

Chocolate and painkillers if needed yes why not, pampering no

Trimalata · 04/02/2025 17:49

My word, some of you sound like Mrs Doyle, "Maybe I like the misery".

You don't get medals for martyrdom, you know..

SpanThatWorld · 04/02/2025 17:49

Pocket money so she can buy her own chocolate.

Noone needs to be pampered because they're having a period.

Kindness is due if people don't feel well whatever the reason but you don't need baths, candles, fluffy socks or whatever 5 days out of every 28.

Duckies · 04/02/2025 17:49

ERthree · 04/02/2025 17:42

My periods started when i was 8, absolutely flooding by 10 and on the pill by 14 to try and ease them, i had endometriosis for 30 years, 5 pregnancies, 3 births, a hysterectomy and i am in the middle of the menopause and yes i can honestly say i just get on with it, of course i have whinged about it all, ran a hot bath and taken pain killers but i haven't had to have a pamper night, the world didn't stop because i had my period.

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This all sounds really difficult, I think you deserved some caring and kindness from yourself and others

RampantIvy · 04/02/2025 17:47

Quinlan · 04/02/2025 16:37

Maybe I’m a bit weird but surely there is chocolate available in the house? I mean, not loads but it’s a pretty normal thing to have in the snacky box for when someone fancies a treat snack.
Just buy some chocolate?

No. We don't keep chocolate in the house as a rule.

Maybe we are the weird ones 😁

littleluncheon · 04/02/2025 17:47

Feel sad for everyone whose husbands aren't running them a bath and nipping to the shop for chocolate when they're on their period!

Mine isn't overly romantic in general but even he manages that much.

GiddyRobin · 04/02/2025 17:46

ERthree · 04/02/2025 17:42

My periods started when i was 8, absolutely flooding by 10 and on the pill by 14 to try and ease them, i had endometriosis for 30 years, 5 pregnancies, 3 births, a hysterectomy and i am in the middle of the menopause and yes i can honestly say i just get on with it, of course i have whinged about it all, ran a hot bath and taken pain killers but i haven't had to have a pamper night, the world didn't stop because i had my period.

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Maybe you should, it might cheer you up. DH came back this morning with two lovely flat whites, and he's popped to the cheese shop this afternoon. Can't wait to eat cheese and olives in the bath later. 😁 It's lovely when someone who adores you shows it and you don't even have to ask.

YoungGunsHavingSomeFunCrazyLadiesKeepEmOnTheRun · 04/02/2025 17:46

ERthree · 04/02/2025 17:42

My periods started when i was 8, absolutely flooding by 10 and on the pill by 14 to try and ease them, i had endometriosis for 30 years, 5 pregnancies, 3 births, a hysterectomy and i am in the middle of the menopause and yes i can honestly say i just get on with it, of course i have whinged about it all, ran a hot bath and taken pain killers but i haven't had to have a pamper night, the world didn't stop because i had my period.

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I always had to get on with it too, that's why I wouldn't want my kids to suffer the same way I have, I want better for them.

Wouldn't things have been a bit nicer for you as a child if you had a cuddle and sympathy? Or should everyone suffer just because you did?

This kid is asking for chocolate, not the moon on a stick.

Anothershittydayinparadise · 04/02/2025 17:46

Dd16 is currently on her period (she suffers horribly from them) and I'm a stressed out miserable perimenopausal 52 year old. We popped into Tesco today and they had large Toblerones reduced to £2. We are currently sat Infront of the fire munching our way through said yummy bar.
Chocolate makes us happy.

LlynTegid · 04/02/2025 17:44

The 'all my friends have this' claim would make me less sympathetic. Otherwise I'd be in favour.

Oioisavaloy27 · 04/02/2025 17:44

ERthree · 04/02/2025 17:42

My periods started when i was 8, absolutely flooding by 10 and on the pill by 14 to try and ease them, i had endometriosis for 30 years, 5 pregnancies, 3 births, a hysterectomy and i am in the middle of the menopause and yes i can honestly say i just get on with it, of course i have whinged about it all, ran a hot bath and taken pain killers but i haven't had to have a pamper night, the world didn't stop because i had my period.

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You are 30 years old this is a kid aged 14.

Oioisavaloy27 · 04/02/2025 17:42

Sometimes my bloody sugar levels drop when I have my period so I crave sweet stuff, surely your not begrudging her a bit of chocolate that's a bit mean!

ERthree · 04/02/2025 17:42

YoungGunsHavingSomeFunCrazyLadiesKeepEmOnTheRun · 04/02/2025 16:59

Ops dd isn't a soldier, she's a kid getting to grips with having a painful period.

And as for the "women died so we must get on with it", fuck that, we aren't allowed to admit periods are painful and want a bit of comfort or chocolate because women died for equal rights years ago?

I hope you never complain about periods, or pregnancy, or childbirth or menopause, after all, women died so we have to keep our pain silent in order to respect them apparently, FFS.

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My periods started when i was 8, absolutely flooding by 10 and on the pill by 14 to try and ease them, i had endometriosis for 30 years, 5 pregnancies, 3 births, a hysterectomy and i am in the middle of the menopause and yes i can honestly say i just get on with it, of course i have whinged about it all, ran a hot bath and taken pain killers but i haven't had to have a pamper night, the world didn't stop because i had my period.

Hesma · 04/02/2025 17:42

What does she mean by pampering? If either of my DDs are have really bad cramps I may run them a bath but that’s as far as it goes.

Nothing wrong with chocolate but I don’t buy anything fancy… they get a Kit Kat or Crunchie or whatever is in the house at the time

ItGhoul · 04/02/2025 17:41

bringmorewashing · 04/02/2025 17:28

Why can't she have whatever chocolate is already in the houae and go lie down with a hot water bottle? Honestly your DD sounds entitled.

Plus I personally wouldn't want to give teen girls the message that natural bodily functions somehow make them weak and precious and in need of special "pampering".

Just because they're 'natural bodily functions' that doesn't mean they're not extremely painful for a lot of women. It's not about being 'weak and precious'. It's about being kind to someone who feels very unwell. I'd cut someone some slack if they had awful stomach cramps due to a gastric bug so why wouldn't I also cut someone some slack if they had similarly awful cramps due to their period? It's not like the fact that it's caused by a period makes that kind of pain any less debilitating or unpleasant than a similar of pain caused by illness.