To feel mortified I was settled out of my job?

But when they are handled properly, genuine agreements which mean both sides have an agreed position, then it means no mudslinging and no pressure for other people connected to feel like they have to choose a side.

it’s not the tool, it’s the way it’s used

A similar thing happened to me and other colleagues when a new manager came in.
It is devastating at the time and my confidence was really low.
I questioned myself a lot and I felt too incompetent to look for another job for a while.
But it's been a few years now and I can reflect on it now and see that it really wasn't me.
My dh was also "managed out" a few years back.
There are some shitty goings on in lots of work places.
Don't take it personally.

It sounds to me that you could benefit from some support either from a coach in relation to the interview process, or a therapist to help with the self confidence issues you find yourself with now. As a well renowned member of an SLT with a public persona and presence I imagine you used to be a very confident person, so that is who people expect to be interviewing. You need to find a version of that person again.

I would also perhaps refer back to your solicitor and ask them to advise what you can say about your leaving your previous job. Or run some options past them.

For example, are you allowed to say "There was a change of management and I was no longer required"

Did they give you a good reference as part of your settlement agreement at least?

In relation to if any ex-colleagues contact you I think I'd be honest and just say "legally I'm not allowed to discuss it. You'd need to speak with X"

Please don't look at it as being sacked. Given the fact that the position caused you so much stress you had to be signed off sick, try and rephrase it in your mind as you've dodged a massive bullet. Nothing would have changed on your return, so, despite how you feel at the moment, it's likely much, much better for your mental health.

I’d go with ‘a change of management meant it was time for me to move on’ with a wry smile, in an interview situation.

FWIW, I worked happily in a senior position for 10 years before we were acquired and in the company we were bought by, the management were absolutely toxic. I stuck it for two years and then jumped ship, and while I wasn’t in your position, it could have gone that way. I also know lies about me were told and that rumours were spread that I was pushed. I’ve now been in a new company for 5 years with 3-5 x the income (I was underpaid for years and didn’t know it) working with amazing people and it was seriously the best thing I did to move on!

I’m sure it will come good for you, do NOT shy away from working your contacts! Get out there, network like a boss and consider an executive coach rather than a counsellor to help you get back on your feet?

This is very true.

These gagging "agreements" need to be banned. They are a huge abuse of power and therefore can't be accurately called agreements at all, more like coercion. I don't see how they can stand up legally as often the people they are enacted upon are in no fit state to make a clear-headed decision or do anything other than get away from a toxic situation as quickly as possible. They're a tool used by bullies with money to ensure that they can perpetuate their vile behaviour.

This is not at all unusual at the top of big organisations. What is unusual is that a)you should probably have had the opportunity to have a lawyer with you and b) the compromise agreement often includes clauses which say how the departure will be communicated (maybe including specific wording). Probably not much you can do about it now (unless the process was contrary to your contract) but definitely a learning point for next time

good luck

OP, this is incredibly common. CEO’s are strong personalities and there are often clashes when a new CEO comes in.

Dont hide away. You haven’t done anything wrong. These things happen. When asked why you left, just say that you and the incoming CEO didn’t have the same vision but you wish the company well. Say that to ex colleagues, in interviews for new roles etc. No one will care. It is a common scenario. Hold your head high!

I know so many people this has happened to. And, though this may not help you at the moment, It's so common it's almost the norm. And I'm sure you know people who have suddenly moved on from a job, or said they are taking time out to go travelling, or just want a break. It's probably happened to them too.

Don't take it personally.

Try not to panic, take time to get well, use the money wisely to get your head back in a good space. Honestly, it's not you, it's just the way these things work. It's not nice - but you'll find somewhere where you are a good fit with management like you were before. Don't start applying for jobs till you feel in a better place - take that time to heal.

This happened to my husband, he'd been so battered down that he went into a total tail spin, and it was incredibly public. Now, 10 years on, he's in an entirely new industry, with nice people, no stress, and better paid.

You need an answer to give to that question.. perhaps ask your solicitor to approach former employer for an agreed form of words?

Compromise agreements are not uncommon and often simply because of personality clash. You have taken it far too much to heart. Stop moping and feeling self pity (I don't mean that cruelly, but if you don't pick yourself up now and get a grip it'll get worse for you in every way.
I would start job hunting immediately before you run out of money and end up being desperate for any job. Try old contacts who know how you work, they may well point you at opportunities they know of that will suit you.
If asked just say you left the last job after 8 years as you didn't see eye to eye with the new CEO. It happens and wouldn't bother me when recruiting. Your track record is more important than a single relationship.
Good luck, but please pick yourself up now.

And just a simple line like, "it was better for me to leave" is enough if people ask. Anyone who knows NDAs are used might put two and two together anyway.

Happened to dh years ago. The company manged out anyone who didn't fit, he had actually sacked a number of people after lengthy disciplinaries, performance plans etc. Then it happened to him. A colleague who worked in hr when news went round that he was leaving said he absolutely had enough evidence to take them to an employment tribunal. But she didn't know that he had been offered cash and a glowing reference saying he was made redundant only due to restructuring into shifts that did not suit if he signed an NDA with a solicitor present agreeing not to talk about it or take them to an employment tribunal.

It was years ago and he is much better out of there. But also, it's never done to just one person. His manager was let go at the same time, others went before and after unexpectedly. Find yourself a better role somewhere that values its employees.

@SoupDragon
She's not outing much and all is anonymous so wind your neck in!!

@SoupDragon it's a special kind of person who kicks someone when they're quite clearly down. I hope you feel good about yourself.

@SackedandDisgraced this happened in the organisation I work for which is a public sector organisation. Thing is you don’t need to be embarrassed because other colleagues will have seen how you’ve been treated etc and although none are coming forward to speak to you about it it’s a fear from them of not wanting to put you in that position but think about it you’ve been there years and all good then suddenly your face doesn’t fit when a newbie comes, they will all know it’s a push out. Things you can take from this is that chances are it’s because you where good at your job that you were pushed as that is most def what happened to a colleague in my organisation. Slowly but surely the newbie is starting to employ more from their previous public sector organisation.

take away from this experience that your next role they will be lucky to have you, and you need to be firm on your own stance of why you left your previous role and by firm on your boundaries of leaving the office to put your kids to bed wtc. You say you can’t find anything with the same flexibility as previous job but actually entering an office at 7am and having jabs made about leaving at 6.30pm is not flexible remeber that!

OP one thought,
You don't say your age, well, as a retired v busy person I now meet many ladies and have time to talk (chill swimming does that) who have said how their confidence was destroyed and anxiety raised around the menopause, affecting how they dealt and felt about work - with hindsight I think I was affected but unaware when I was 'eased out of a job' I felt just like you.
Maybe worth sanity checking?
HRT can be life changing for many- too late for me though

😂😂😂

What person?

This happens all the time and it’s so unfair. I don’t think you should feel disgraced at all. Proper professionals know there are toxic “leaders” everywhere. They are often enabled by weak HR supporters who are bullied into going along with it all. Although you would love your job still who wants to be in a toxic environment ?

Exactly ‘reached a mutual agreement for me to leave’ sounds like ‘I quit before I was sacked’ !

I actually was sacked once and I was honest about it at my first interview (I was quite young) and the person interviewing told me not to be quite so honest in future 🤣

My solicitor told me that I could say we had reached mutual agreement for me to leave the business. As the company I worked for we're making loads of redundancies (they avoided paying me my full redundancy because of my length of service and salary) I just say I was made redundant. No one has questioned it.

This entirely. Ive been there and known others in exactly your position.

Great advice on previous posts too. One step at a time, prepare the sentence youre happy with, one coffee meet, then another, network. You will come out so much stronger, you can do this,
Good luck

Was it not agreed what you would say was your reason for leaving? In interview I’d just say you were made redundant, it’s not untrue.

I am so grateful for this thread. I was a public sector CEO and moved into a senior role in a plc two years ago. I really like my Company and can see where I add value they can't easily replace. But I've seen people managed out and had a constant fear it would happen to me. It wasn't an issue at all in the public sector and I haven't known how to deal if it happened to me. So many brilliant posters here have convinced me that, even if it does happen, it isn't the end of everything and can be the gateway to something better. I've seen such a parade of strong, impressive people giving excellent advice- and really helping the OP emotionally and practically.

@SackedandDisgraced please ditch your username. You clearly aren't disgraced, and you weren't sacked. You are great at your job and have an opportunity now for a fresh lease on life. Now that you will be looking for your next role, know your worth and stipulate working conditions that are compatible with your family life- a decent employer will want you to keep things in balance and you need a reset. 💐

Thank you to all the awesome women (and maybe men) who have posted on this thread. Free life coaching is MN at its best.