Waiting for the right guy equals no baby

I don’t think OP was talking about “meh” partnerships though. I would have thought that was normal.

They do give themselves away with their terminology don’t they.

So there is no need for this panicky post then.

Women who desperately want children will settle for a mediocre partnership.

Women who refuse to enter into a mediocre partnership will either go it alone or forego motherhood.

Which is no different to now.

Each to their own but I prefer to remain single and childless!

Depends if this decent guy would have any say in this or if the pregnancy would be an ''accident''.

Would the decent guy know he's not the one and you're settling, though?

I imagine mutual settling in order to co-parent together, amicably, might work, because both parties are on the same page. But that's hypothetical and I don't know any IRL examples.

Relationships where one party is in love and thinks they're loved in return, but the other party isn't in love and is just using them... that's an entire dishonest mess that will 100% backfire.

** and stay in a loveless marriage for years where I'd potentially be unhappy? Or quickly become a single parent after I got what I wanted?

No thanks.**

Fair enough @SouthLondonMum22

I think in an ideal world I'd 100% agree with you, but as a single woman in my mid-30s, I am softening on the idea of getting pregnant with a decent guy who would make a great father but who isn't 'the one'. I don't find the idea of co-parenting all that bad. I could be being incredibly naive, however.

It's all hypothetical anyway, there's no one on the horizon, either in the soulmate or decent-but-not-the-one category!

Not necessarily- I have two beautiful daughters. Their dad isn't perfect but I can look after them and we are very happy

and stay in a loveless marriage for years where I'd potentially be unhappy? Or quickly become a single parent after I got what I wanted?

No thanks.

I didn't and wouldn't settle. I'd rather not have had children at all than give them a useless, shitty father.

@SouthLondonMum22

What if he wasn't a useless, shitty person but not someone you're in love with? There are varying degrees of 'settling'.

Haven't RTFT.

I'm in my mid-30s and if I decide to go down the baby route, I would consider lowering my standards slightly just to get pregnant and not worry that I wasn't having a baby with my 'soulmate'. They just need to be healthy and a decent human being. I would worry about the rest (I.e. him not being 'the one') further down the line.

I wouldn't have a baby with just anyone, though.

Species means Human. Hence my query.

I suggest you read more into AI. Lots of jobs will be taken over by it or hours massively reduced.
I disagree that red tape is typically workers rights or environmental protection. There's so much red tape in government and large org that has nothing to do with these things.
I could take hours telling you the changes I'd make in government but quite frankly I'd be bored and so would you.
Yes the latter takes thought but if you always do the same things you get the same results.

What if we don't want to be human breeding machines or want to share our offspring with a total waste of space? Do you really think the product of this ridiculous suggestion (a living breathing child) will turn into a well-adjusted adult with this shambolic set up? A child's best interest is far more important than a woman's selfish desire to have a child at any cost.

Our worth as women does not solely lie in reproducing, a woman is far better off single, independent and not financially burdened by a low life loser, just for the sake of being a mother.

There is also the fact that it's dishonest to be in a relationship that you are only staying in to have a child. I can't imagine telling a guy I love him and having sex with him just so I could get pregnant when I wasn't being 100% sincere. How does that work in real life.

What about the political, social, environmental, and economic shifts that will follow from an ever increasing population?

The vast majority of people marry within their own socio economic class.

The CEO marrying the secretary might be cute in a 1950s romantic comedy, but it's not the reality.

The issue is; we seem to have become a society where everyone just expects everything as a God Given Right.

The wants of the parents trump the notion that this may not be a suitable situation to bring a child into- be that lack of emotional or financial stability. They seem to forget that this is a real life human being they are bringing into the world.

This. The thought of going through such an intimate procedure with the sperm of someone I don't even know is verging on disgusting to me.

Lots of men might tick good boxes on paper, but their personality in real life can be either abusive, high manipulative, narcissistic, or verging on psychopathic in some cases (they won't all commit crime or have criminal records). It can take months if not years in some cases for those traits to fully come out in a regular relationship, so the likelyhood that they are going to be decently screened out if the man is deceptive is about zero.

Personality traits can be biologically inherited and you can't eliminate them all by the decent upbringing, so imagine having a son with those traits as a single mother too. It's very risky, and women learn this the hard way.

Men can still be bad fathers without any abuse or danger.

It's a choice, a selfish one with little thought to the child and all about what the woman wants.

I didn't and wouldn't settle. I'd rather not have had children at all than give them a useless, shitty father.

No one is owed a child by another human being, let alone a decent one.

@SouthLondonMum22 I think you're melodramatising the majority of situations. Mostly by 'settling' I'm thinking of men that are a bit meh, not outright abusers or dangerous. That's a very different scenario.

If you're in your late 30s and with an OK guy then yes I think many women settle and I don't think it's 'incredibly' selfish, I think it's a normal human drive. You want people to be heroically self sacrificing but you don't have to make that call yourself.

It's selfish to have a child if you suspect he won't be a good father, you know it isn't a good situation etc

What about the poor child that has to be born into it?

Also, the predictable "middle class women", who, according to many on here, really are the root of all societal decay.

Selfish to want a child? Well by that definition we all are