Omg please help!

In our house we all brush teeth before breakfast (grew up doing it that way and it’s better for your teeth) but otherwise I concur with the vast and very normal majority: you all go downstairs in pyjamas and just get on with it. Two minutes tooth brushing, the briefest of wees for the adults and 5yo, nappy change for the toddler, then downstairs with the children looking adorable and rumpled in pyjamas and the adults looking like the love children of Shane McGowan and Robert Smith.

DS, two, will tolerate about 50% of the teeth and wees and nappies shenanigans before kicking off so usually there’s an advance guard and a lot of nipping back up and back and forth, but that gets the steps in; or we take his toothbrush downstairs. All back upstairs after breakfast for getting dressed, sometimes they get dressed downstairs with one of us while the other showers. But in general, there’s a lot of up and down the stairs in a big house. It’s never occurred to me to try to have tea in bed while my children wait nicely. From birth DD used to like to start the day with a 5.30am poonami so we never got into any leisurely habits!

Put a kettle up there ( is it baby milk or cow?) and a minifridge upstairs

At nearly 3 before bed I'd say if you scream no milk. And stick with it. He may scream they first few days but so be it.

Yep every single morning without fail I immediately get two (4 and under) children in dressing gowns and we go downstairs to eat breakfast. No cups of tea brought upstairs or anything!!

teeth are brushed before the school run.

I haven’t read the full thread.

But could you go to get the drinks before you get him out of the cot in the morning?

As it only takes you 2-3 minutes, you could get him up for the day and take him into your room where the drinks would already be waiting?

Of course it’s care-giver perceived – a toddler can’t report their own sleep.

He can do stairs, it’s beneficial to be in a bed up til three and he wants milk to drink. None of these things are issues.

This is weird. When he wakes, you all go downstairs in your pjs or dressing gowns, have your breakfast, end of issue.
He should also be in a bed at 3.

Yes 😂😂😂

Take him down with you? Have flask of milk brought up from the night before (insulated!) - is he waking up really hungry?

Sounds like you are babying your preschooler!!

3 year olds should be able to do stairs, don’t need warm milk and should be in beds!!!

We had a large house with multiple floors and the stairs had several turns. I well remember having a birthday party for DS on the top floor (biggest floor space) and DH having to carry one of the kids because he was scared to go up and down on his own.

It sounds like a tantrum. Sympathies - they can be intense! But a tantrum as I understand them are just kids expressing emotions they don't know how to control. Your DC should be free to express themselves in their own home, so I let my DC scream it out if they need to. If the neighbours hear it, maybe they will come and offer some help!

Could it be a tantrum about not having control over getting the milk themselves rather than the wait time? My oldest is not much older and happily opens the safety gates, goes down independently and gets snacks if needed. OK he is pretty tall and is very safe when allowed this freedom, but it won't be long. You could walk in front of your DC on the stairs to be able to catch them if they fall.

I do try to keep my DC upstairs while I get ready (max 30 mins, no drinks etc) otherwise it will be tricky to get back upstairs, but some days they need breakfast earlier and I have to get ready later or not at all!

Of course, I've no idea why you don't.

He's 3, he's not a baby. He should have been out of his cot and moving around independently under supervision of course in the case of stairs, long ago.

This is a you problem, not a child problem

Could you ask him when he’s calm?

At three I would tell him he won't be getting milk if he screams. Then really don't give the milk if he screams. I bet in a couple of days he will have stopped that nonsense.

Also agree you should get him used to the stairs even if if involves hands and knees a bit.

Absolute batshit thread.

Yes, yes we are. Also if you’re 3yo can’t climb stairs independently you need to get an occupational therapy referral…

My DD went through a real hungry phase around this age, to the extent I kept a fruit bowl upstairs for a time so she could have a banana as soon as her eyes were open. I prioritised getting her fed over everything else at that stage. She just needed to eat, so I ran with it. Went downstairs in PJs, got her fed and then she was happier and settled to play while I then did my shower / got dressed later. I think you just need to swap around the order you do things in. Knock the upstairs drinks on the head for a while, while you sort the toddler first.

He's 3 he should be able to walk up and downstairs holding onto your hand. Mine both have severe autism but they were doing this by about 18 months. Sounds like your babying him keeping him in a cot. Does he still have bottles and dummies as well?

Probably wouldn't be worried about waking the neighbours if that was the case 😂

Do you live in a stately home or a castle ?? Just take him down.

Well no, not the toilet bit, but yes it is very normal to have breakfast before getting dressed?

Our routine is: get up 6.30/7
Anyone who needs toilet, uses toilet.
Go downstairs, set up table for breakfast,
Make tea/coffee, sit for a bit
Toast, cereal etc

kids watch cartoons for a bit. Then it’s off to get dressed, brush teeth etc.

I don’t really get this thread at all. Talk about making a mountain out of a molehill. Just go downstairs together and have breakfast when he wakes up.

I don't really see how that's relevant to the op situation as they clearly eat breakfast before leaving the house.