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Original poster

Omg please help!

763 replies

Toddlerhelpplease123 · 02/02/2025 08:33

Toddler is nearly 3.

Every morning when he wakes up. We get him out of his cot and he can run around upstairs or come into bed whilst his dad or I get morning drinks (milk/ tea etc.)

For the last couple of weeks he has started screaming in the morning when we go downstairs to get the drinks.

Like full on. Full wake the whole street up screaming non stop.

I honestly dont know what to do.

Obviously I have been being calm and saying whats wrong, etc. Explaining dad always comes back with the drinks. Offering other drinks that are already available in case hes thirsty (water, squash).

We have done ignoring as well. And sternly please stop screaming - because it is literally as loud as he can.

This has been a few weeks now. He’s just been getting worse. And obviously the return of his drinks is the culmination of the event and he just happily drinks his milk so I dont know whether he thinks his screaming is resulting in a positive outcome.

But we cannot have this.

What do people suggest?

I said to DP this morning maybe we need to try no milk. He can have a glass at breakfast but hes not going to die or starve of milk deprivation in the 20/30 minutes it takes everyone to get to breakfast.

Any ideas! Help please

OP posts:
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SnapdragonToadflax · 02/02/2025 08:54

All go downstairs for morning drinks. Don't brush teeth first, yuck! Toilet first if he needs it, but if he's still in a nappy overnight he probably doesn't.

I'm sure he'll be able to manage the stairs, my son is usually 9th centile and he's been doing them since he was about 1.

FabuIous · 02/02/2025 08:54

Toddlerhelpplease123 · 02/02/2025 08:50

It’s not taking two of us to get drinks

Are people honestly just plucking toddler out of room in dressing gown and going immediately downstairs for breakfast without going to the toilet or brushing teeth or anything.

Show quote history

Yes, of course! If you know they’re about to scream the house down.
Or rather, child wakes up, go and get them, bring them down, grab milk for them, then go to the loo.

Bruisername · 02/02/2025 08:54

The toilet issue only makes sense if you don’t have one near the kitchen

I think you are being very defensive that you have to do it the way you have always done it - you need to stop and realise it’s not working for your 3yo.

Season0fthesticks · 02/02/2025 08:53

Toddlerhelpplease123 · 02/02/2025 08:50

It’s not taking two of us to get drinks

Are people honestly just plucking toddler out of room in dressing gown and going immediately downstairs for breakfast without going to the toilet or brushing teeth or anything.

Show quote history

I have a 3 year old
She vaults out of her cot into my bed (will be putting her in a toddler bed soon) and boom that's me awake. I pick her up and take her straight downstairs, where she has milk
I'll go toilet, put the heating on then make my cereal or tea etc

Hercisback1 · 02/02/2025 08:52

Teeth brushing should be after breakfast anyway.

Toilet, if they need it then quickly do that. Usually would rather breakfast first then toilet.

TwentyTwentyFive · 02/02/2025 08:52

Toddlerhelpplease123 · 02/02/2025 08:50

It’s not taking two of us to get drinks

Are people honestly just plucking toddler out of room in dressing gown and going immediately downstairs for breakfast without going to the toilet or brushing teeth or anything.

Show quote history

Yes! Why wouldn't you? He's 2 he's likely to spill something down his clothes in the morning before finishing his breakfast and who wants to eat food straight after brushing their teeth??

Original poster
Toddlerhelpplease123 · 02/02/2025 08:51

He should be able to climb stairs unless they’re like the stairs inside a lighthouse.

Tbh they aren’t far off and he has 2 percentile legs bless him.

OP posts:
Anewuser · 02/02/2025 08:50

This is a great thread.

He’s 3 but you are treating him like a baby.

He should be able to climb stairs unless they’re like the stairs inside a lighthouse.

Who is everyone? How many people live there?

Most 3 year olds wake up early and people just make their breakfast and tea around them in the kitchen/living room.

Hercisback1 · 02/02/2025 08:50

Toddlerhelpplease123 · 02/02/2025 08:50

It’s not taking two of us to get drinks

Are people honestly just plucking toddler out of room in dressing gown and going immediately downstairs for breakfast without going to the toilet or brushing teeth or anything.

Show quote history

Yes!

cheddercherry · 02/02/2025 08:50

Am I missing something? Why do you have to strictly get dressed before all going downstairs?

can’t one of you just leg it down and bring his milk back before going down again to make your tea? Would surely take 30 seconds not 5 minutes?

I’m really confused why he can’t just come with you though and then you walk back upstairs together with your drinks?

Sorry if I’m being dim but there seems so many simple solutions and I just don’t get the issue?

Original poster
Toddlerhelpplease123 · 02/02/2025 08:50

DJrocks · 02/02/2025 08:48

I still dont get the issue with taking him downstairs unless you’re living in Buckingham Palace. Just take him down with you or one of you makes the drinks. I can’t see how it takes 2 of you to make 3 drinks. It’s no big deal to take him down and go back up if you’re insistent on it taking 2 of you to make drinks.

It’s not taking two of us to get drinks

Are people honestly just plucking toddler out of room in dressing gown and going immediately downstairs for breakfast without going to the toilet or brushing teeth or anything.

OP posts:
Bruisername · 02/02/2025 08:50

You talk about him like he’s a 3m old.

he should be able to navigate the stairs by now. My kids grew up in a tall terrace so teaching them stairs was important

unless you live in Buckingham palace I really don’t understand why you have to stay upstairs until you’re ready either. It sounds like you have quite rigid thinking and you need a bit of flexibility with kids

CantHoldMeDown · 02/02/2025 08:49

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

LadyMacbethWasMisunderstood · 02/02/2025 08:49

This should be a total non issue. Take him down to start the day or bring a thermos of his milk (hot or cold) upstairs with you when you go to bed.

Hercisback1 · 02/02/2025 08:49

How can't a 3yo get downstairs unless there's additional needs?

Getting him back upstairs shouldn't be a big deal either!

Have a pack of biscuits by the bed, give him one of those as soon as he wakes. Get him dressed then all go downstairs for actual breakfast. Get rid of the milk.

DJrocks · 02/02/2025 08:48

I still dont get the issue with taking him downstairs unless you’re living in Buckingham Palace. Just take him down with you or one of you makes the drinks. I can’t see how it takes 2 of you to make 3 drinks. It’s no big deal to take him down and go back up if you’re insistent on it taking 2 of you to make drinks.

Theresacatinmykitchenwhatamigonnado · 02/02/2025 08:48

He's bored and frustrated and your morning routine is strange. Why is the whole getting dressed thing so rigid?

CantHoldMeDown · 02/02/2025 08:48

This reply has been withdrawn

This has been withdrawn by MNHQ at the poster's request.

Zanatdy · 02/02/2025 08:48

Why do you need to get dressed before you go down? Perfectly normal to down in PJ’s etc for breakfast, then go back up to get dressed later.

Original poster
Toddlerhelpplease123 · 02/02/2025 08:47

And no he’s not alone. One of us is always upstairs with him getting ready.

And the cot. He likes his cot has no issues with it. We are going to change it soon.

OP posts:
TwentyTwentyFive · 02/02/2025 08:46

How is he too short to navigate the stairs? Also you don't all need to get up, showered and dressed before breakfast just go down and eat and then get ready afterwards?

Original poster
Toddlerhelpplease123 · 02/02/2025 08:45

We have a large house and he’s too short to really navigate the stairs independently. If we take him down then we have to ferry him back up for everyone to get ready, have showers, get dressed etc.

It’s something we are going to have to try but I am not convinced it’s not just moving the problem.

He has drinks upstairs. He’s not going to die in the period it takes to get drinks (less than 5 minutes - probably 2-3). And he’s literally screaming blue bloody murder bless him.

It will take him longer to get milk if we are getting dressed.

OP posts:
Bruisername · 02/02/2025 08:43

How long does it take to get a cup of milk?

take him downstairs and have breakfast - prolonged morning drinks does not seem very 3yo friendly and that’s what he’s telling you!!

TwentyTwentyFive · 02/02/2025 08:43

I agree with others surely you take him downstairs with you? Also if he's nearly 3 he really should be moving out of the cot and into a bed.

DJrocks · 02/02/2025 08:41

Don’t leave him alone upstairs. Either take him with you or one of you makes the drinks and the other stays upstairs. If he wakes at the same time everyday then you get up 10 minutes earlier and have the drinks ready.