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AIBU?

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Original poster

Do your kids give you a birthday card?

31 replies

Anon4778 · 01/02/2025 19:47

I turned 47 yesterday. My husband booked a meal at a local pub last night so it wasn’t forgotten or anything.

I am feeling really hurt and emotional that neither he or either of my kids gave me a birthday card or anything yesterday morning. Am I being ridiculous?

Older daughter 17 baked a cake the day before but then didn’t even wish me happy birthday in the morning - she did say it when I collected her from work mid afternoon but the cake just sort of sat there with a dishcloth over it and was never actually given. Younger daughter 10 went to the shop and got me a notepad and some chocolate off her own bat after school which was really thoughtful
of her.

I organise birthday cards / gifts for everyone else, I want them all to know they’re loved and special on their birthdays. I organise Christmas and put a lot of effort and thought into that too. I’m just feeling really hurt that none of them bothered.

To make matters worse I’ve said I feel hurt by all this, and now my husband and older daughter are basically angry with me for being upset.

OP posts:
Original poster
Anon4778 · 01/02/2025 20:00

Maybe I am being ridiculous. I used to enjoy getting or making something for my own mum as a kid.

OP posts:
Jojobees · 01/02/2025 19:59

Yes, my children write a card for me, which up until my last birthday was chosen by them and bought by their dad( my DH) this birthday the teenager took the primary aged child into town by themselves and bought cards and flowers.

You aren’t being unreasonable to expect a card and to be upset when you didn’t get one.

EmberAsh · 01/02/2025 19:58

Your husband booked a meal, your eldest made you a cake and wished you happy birthday in the afternoon and your youngest bought you a present but you're upset because they didn't wish you happy birthday through a card as you expected. I'm surprised you're getting sympathy as I think you come off quite poorly here.

Natsku · 01/02/2025 19:56

Mine always make me cards but I trained them to do that from when they were toddlers, don't think it would occur to them otherwise

Sheknowsaboutme · 01/02/2025 19:53

No.

but I don’t celebrate my birthday and tell them not to. At least they respect my wish.

but if i did and they didn’t bother, id be upset . A card costs nothing

stayathomer · 01/02/2025 19:50

Mums decorate the place, get their favourite foods, favourite cake, presents, card etc etc. You do it to see them happy but that doesn’t mean someone shouldn’t do it back!!! Yanbu op, they’re angry because they feel guilty (I hope!!), although your ds baking for you was for lt of cool!