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Original poster

If you were meeting someone in a cafe and your baby was asleep…

190 replies

parttimeworks · 01/02/2025 16:06

And the relative wanted a cuddle, would you get a sleeping baby out of the pram and risk waking them up for this- they’re in a bit of a phase of fighting daytime naps and rarely have a non contact nap, but the family member hasn’t seen baby in a few weeks and is sad about it

We have different opinions so I’d just be interested to know what the consensus is!

OP posts:
ilovesushi · 01/02/2025 19:07

No way jose. Let sleeping dogs lie and let sleeping babies lie.

JollyViper · 01/02/2025 19:04

@oakleaffy googled for first time.... It auto filled, no mention of dogs

If you were meeting someone in a cafe and your baby was asleep…
Woodywoodpecker321 · 01/02/2025 19:04

Of course not

oakleaffy · 01/02/2025 18:53

JollyViper · 01/02/2025 16:08

Isn't the general rule never wake a sleeping baby?

I think that's dogs..'Never wake a sleeping dog' - at least by suddenly touching as they can have a thing called ''sleep startle'' where they react by snapping before fully awake- It's a protective thing, but if you call their name gently first to wake them, it's les likely to occur.

However...No WAY would I have woken son up when he was asleep just so someone could have a hold..I don't get the wanting to hold and touch other people's babies - look, but don't touch.

mondaytosunday · 01/02/2025 18:52

No. I can easily spend an hour and a half at a cafe so inevitable baby would wake at some point! But in this instance no.
No @JollyViper of course you can wake a baby. I often did if sleeping too long during the day. But that's not the case here.

biggreenapple24 · 01/02/2025 18:50

Absolutely not, wouldn't dream of it! I'd be shocked if they asked.

Commonsense22 · 01/02/2025 18:48

Not if you're struggling with it. I have always let friends and family cuddle my sleeping babies though as it's not been an issue.

Psychologymam · 01/02/2025 18:46

parttimeworks · 01/02/2025 16:10

How would you deal with the relative if they looked disappointed or if they asked outright ‘can I hold?’

Show quote history

I’d pretend to assume they hadn’t realised and say oh sorry baby is actually asleep - what a shame, but hopefully they’ll wake before you go or the next time. They are entitled to their feelings, but really not entitled to wake a baby - completely oblivious to general social norms to ask!

Thatissimplyuntrue · 01/02/2025 18:42

Advice given to me as a new mum by a friend who was a mum of 3;

You NEVER wake a sleeping baby. EVER!!

MargaretThursday · 01/02/2025 18:39

Yes, possibly at the end though so if baby did get upset then we would be going shortly. Babies love human contact.

Although tbf none of mine would have slept in the buggy while I met someone in a café for a drink. If they slept in the buggy, first sign of me getting comfy/sitting down/arriving home and they'd be wide awake.

WhiteRosesAndCandles · 01/02/2025 18:39

Absolutely not. I wouldn't wake a sleeping baby.

Ponderingg · 01/02/2025 18:32

parttimeworks · 01/02/2025 16:10

How would you deal with the relative if they looked disappointed or if they asked outright ‘can I hold?’

Show quote history

I’d laugh and say ‘absolutely not. if I wake her now, she’ll scream for the next half hour.’

Greypinkskies · 01/02/2025 18:28

No, the baby will be awake soon enough

Christy135 · 01/02/2025 18:27

Of course not. Let the baby nap.

TomatoSandwiches · 01/02/2025 18:27

Babies need their sleep, anyone asking to disrupt that so they can play mummy is incredibly selfish.

MangshorJhol · 01/02/2025 18:26

If I was meeting a beloved relative who had driven for hours (and whom I wouldn’t see for a long while), I would. Otherwise no.

TheGoogleMum · 01/02/2025 18:25

I'd explain why I didn't want to disturb baby, but they could wait for baby to wake up.

Wavescrashingonthebeach · 01/02/2025 18:22

The stupid thing is, had op woke baby up then relative probably wouldn't have got a cuddle anyway they would have got a red faced, screaming baby who only wants Mummy! Absolutely bonkers.

TheNinkyNonkyIsATardis · 01/02/2025 18:19

God no.

I still see red when I remember a friend of MIL's wanting to unwrap my sleeping baby from his blankets just to see how long his legs were.

ChampagneLassie · 01/02/2025 18:15

parttimeworks · 01/02/2025 16:10

How would you deal with the relative if they looked disappointed or if they asked outright ‘can I hold?’

Show quote history

no I wouldn’t disturb her when she’s sleeping. It can be quite tricky to get her to sleep she really needs it etc. many people have no clue, even parents people tend to forget the baby stage

dammit88 · 01/02/2025 18:15

I wouldn't. But might change my mind on that depending on the reason relative hasn't seen the baby for so long.

WearyAuldWumman · 01/02/2025 18:12

parttimeworks · 01/02/2025 16:06

And the relative wanted a cuddle, would you get a sleeping baby out of the pram and risk waking them up for this- they’re in a bit of a phase of fighting daytime naps and rarely have a non contact nap, but the family member hasn’t seen baby in a few weeks and is sad about it

We have different opinions so I’d just be interested to know what the consensus is!

No. Leave the baby to sleep.

Hankunamatata · 01/02/2025 18:11

I wouldn't wake but also perhaps would arrange to meet near end of babies nap or when baby is awake so relative can have a hold

AleaEim · 01/02/2025 18:05

Not a chance in hell, my 6 week old is like yours.

nodramaplz · 01/02/2025 18:04

No