To not be surprised a 35 year old with a history of eating disorder would struggle to get pregnant (lily Collins)

I realise I made loads of typos in that post. The sister gave birth alone (well with her girlfriend there) and called her sister and BIL when she had the baby.

Totally. Great story with a lovely outcome. I’m all for surrogacy as you have described more out of love and family than money and exploitation.

You don't give another woman a chance at being pregnant

You talk like pregnancy without a baby benefits women in any way. It’s extremely invasive and risky and brings a lot of complications. It’s not a blessing that us women are chomping at the bit to have

Why will it be throughly loved? Because Lily Colllins threw some cash at a poor person to do the hard work for her?

Im fucking sick of surrogates being the invisible party in these conversations

You wouldn't be selling and your friend wouldn't be buying. It would still mess with the childs head later in life.

I will absolutely judge a person that buys a baby. Buying a 5 year old or a 30 year old is illegal so why is buying a newborn ok ?
Yes she has got what she wanted, all about her after all. What about the child that will have to live with the fact it's Mother sold her and her Mum bought her? No that doesn't matter as long as the adult gets what it wants.

Because as kind as your intentions are/were, you would have been that baby's mother, not your friend. There is nothing more traumatic to a newborn baby than being taken away from the human it doesn't even realise it isn't still physically apart of, regardless of how much the 'parents' love it.

The actual mother is probably not the surrogate it’s possibly the couples embryo that was transferred we don’t know ?

I have two friends with a history of eating disorders who had their first babies over 35.

My best friend’s daughter was stillborn due to a medical condition she didn’t know she had that made pregnancy extremely dangerous for her and her unborn child. My heart was broken for her and the loss of the little girl I would have loved like family. I offered to carry an embryo for her, and absolutely would have done it gladly if she had wanted me to and was her only way to have a child. How could that be impossible to defend?

You’re ridiculous and must be so unfulfilled to even comment or care. I feel so sorry for you and delighted for Lily 🥰

https://www.antitraffickingreview.org/index.php/atrjournal/article/view/542/416

This is an interesting and balanced legal view on human trafficking and surrogacy for anyone interested.

Surrogacy issue aside, I think it's awful to describe a woman 35+ with a history of eating disorders as "barren". Who made you a fertility expert?

It's been widely discredited this myth fertility drops off a cliff at 35. People with previous eating disorders have babies all the time. To suggest that people in both these categories would be "barren" is both offensive and disingenuous.

Sorry but the UK only ranks highly for 30's+ births because of fertility treatments, access to healthcare & overall general health & the 'statistics' is largely is based on live births

What percentage of women in their 30s use fertility treatment to have a live birth??

If more women have a live birth at 35 without fertility treatment than with fertility treatment -(have a guess which is correct) your point that LC being 35 is a significant reason for her being "barren" (lovely) is null and void.

Oh and the average age of women having their first child in the UK is younger than the average age of the women starting IVF ...so it doesn't stack up that the average age of first birth has been raised by IVF.

What a horrible thread. It's not for us to judge why she went down the surrogacy route. Infertility is very painful so I'm glad she's finally got the family she wanted. That baby will be thoroughly loved.

You have presented no evidence to back up your claims. Therefore, your comments just come across as the ramblings of a misogynistic man

The possible effect of an eating disorder is one thing but referring to a woman being 35 as an obvious factor for her being "barren" is utterly weird...... You do realise the average age of a first time mother in the UK is around 31. That the number of women in their 40s having babies has now overtaken women under 20. That the NHS fertility page states (if it's still there) that 90% of women 39 and under will fall pregnant within two years of trying.

There was only one woman below mid 30s in my antenatal class.

There is no 35 cliff, there never has been (take it from someone who lives in a country where many couples didn't use contraception due to religious influence until recently ... The majority didn't stop having babies at 35. They'd probably have been over the moon if they had).

People who aren't good at non binary thinking seem to interpret the increasing decrease around 35 in fertility as a cliff. Steeper decrease is not a cliff.

There are 40s, especially early 40s, women on the pregnancy choices forum on here nearly very week, having to contemplate terminations because of misinformation like this.

Fertility window does not end in the 30s for many women.

It never has.

I know about human trafficking and - irrespective of my views on surrogacy - it's really not. Please read up on what human trafficking actually is - a barbaric practice where women (or children) are lied to and then shipped across boarders, often to be forced into the sex trade so others can financially benefit. These women might live in tiny, cramped conditions and forced to have sex multiple times a day with many men. As for effectively "blaming" a women for suffering infertility for a) her age and b) suffering from an often deadly illness, that's both judgemental and appalling.

You clearly believe a woman's value lies in her ability to have babies.

And no, the fertility window is not from puberty. You are suggesting that my daughter, who started her periods at age 9, is better equipped to carry a pregnancy than a adult woman.

You're speaking nonsense.

You sound like a certain type of bitter man who spouts this kind of hateful shit about woman and girls.

I completely agree with this but think that's separate to talking about one particular woman who might be on here.