Active discussions

Please or to access all these features

Talk
AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to start giving personalised gifts so they don't get regifted back to me?

231 replies

offfswitch · 31/01/2025 22:01

Firstly I have no problem with regifting. But the golden rule is you don't regift to the person who gave you the gift in the first place!

It is happening more and more often and it is just getting annoying and it feels so thoughtless that they didn't even remember that I gave it to them in the first place.

For example, I have a friend who is a coffee aficionado so bought him a coffee hamper. He regifted it back to me. I don't even drink coffee!!

My new plan is to give personalised gifts. Surely they won't get regifted back to me?

OP posts:
ScupperedbytheSea · 01/02/2025 09:30

Definitely sounds time to move to cards only for birthdays, with zero expectations for gifts on either side.

Plaided · 01/02/2025 09:23

Sometimes people buy similar gifts back as they think it’s something you like (I have been guilty of this).

Just buy them something you’d like to be given back to you!

AngelinaFibres · 01/02/2025 09:19

Mumtobabyhavoc · 01/02/2025 01:17

Give something you love with your name on it. 😉

Barbara Streisand and Maria Carey give their staff silver frames ( with the celebrities face in) every Christmas. Perhaps you could give everyone a photo of yourself in a frame that says " special memories " or "friendship is so precious" since you are determined to keep gifting. .

AngelinaFibres · 01/02/2025 09:15

offfswitch · 31/01/2025 22:12

I have tried to introduce wishlists but people don't want to get something from there because it is free to regift. I do try and give gifts that I know people will like such as coffee for my coffee drinking friend. I got Lavazza because he has that all the time. Still got regifted back to me.

If I get something for Colin that has his name on it, then he can only regift it to another Colin 😂

Charity shops are full of crap with people's names on. Everything that has a name on is just tat, absolute tat. Stop buying gifts. My friend often mentions how sad she is that Debenhams and BHS went bust because they were so good for gifts for nieces and nephews. I dare say the recipients of all the tat are very relieved that sources are more limited

SophiaSW1 · 01/02/2025 09:15

Don't buy more stuff for him. Just keep the coffee set and give it back to him next time! See how long you can keep it going. He can hardly complain.

KeepinOn · 01/02/2025 09:13

I would prefer nothing.

Maybe they would, also!

Maybe your friends are trying to tell you something with their obvious regifting.

Lucia573 · 01/02/2025 09:11

Give champagne/good wine and write your gift message directly onto the bottle label with a Sharpie!

zizza · 01/02/2025 09:09

I'm with all the other people saying "stop buying gifts". Treat them to lunch or a visit somewhere nice, if you really feel the need

Housebuy1 · 01/02/2025 09:04

Jumblebum · 31/01/2025 22:08

Just stop buying gifts.

This!

CanelliniBeans · 01/02/2025 08:59

Endofyear · 31/01/2025 22:29

I'd buy them things you'd like! That way, if it gets regifted back to you, you won't be unhappy about it 😂

This

Daisy12Maisie · 01/02/2025 08:48

Just try and cut down on gifts. Say please don't buy me anything for my birthday/ Christmas as I am stopping buying gifts from now on. Done.
Money and stress saved for everyone.

Gonk123 · 01/02/2025 08:48

Ha ha great post…made me laugh 😆

RobinEllacotStrike · 01/02/2025 08:47

Another vote for stop buying gifts.

People are telling you the gifts are unneeded & unwanted. You are just circulating expensive landfill

Mumofteenandtween · 01/02/2025 08:45

WolfFoxHare · 01/02/2025 08:33

I’d just start buying them things you really like. Then if they regift it to, you get a lovely gift.

This. Did Homer Simpson once buy Marge a bowling ball with “Homer” on it?

2Rebecca · 01/02/2025 08:42

I would buy fewer gifts also I don't see why your godson's parents get a say in what you buy him. Get him a voucher.

MrsBobtonTrent · 01/02/2025 08:41

The issue here is that you are making a thoughtful effort and Colin is not. If you want to continue this charade, then stop the effort and just exchange notional trifles. I tend to give wine in these circumstances - I generally have some as we don’t drink much but get given it. It’s easy to shove in a bottle bag (which accumulate in a cupboard). The recipient can use it or pass it on. It solves the social problem of a gift.

Getting passive aggressive about personalised gifts is a bit pointless. I doubt Colin will care - he probably finds the gift exchanging ritual as tedious as I do.

Mumtobabyhavoc · 01/02/2025 08:40

Youngheartsalittletogetherness · 01/02/2025 02:13

Or go with something like a cushion,cup, calendar with your face printed on it..then that's the end of gift giving and a fuck you too😀

Show quote history

God, this made me laugh. 😂👏

SleepyHippy3 · 01/02/2025 08:37

offfswitch · 31/01/2025 22:12

I have tried to introduce wishlists but people don't want to get something from there because it is free to regift. I do try and give gifts that I know people will like such as coffee for my coffee drinking friend. I got Lavazza because he has that all the time. Still got regifted back to me.

If I get something for Colin that has his name on it, then he can only regift it to another Colin 😂

But then just stop buying gifts for people, and save that money and buy yourself something nice.

CaptainCaaaavemaan · 01/02/2025 08:35

I used to get sent personalised clothing and bags with Disney princesses on for my two daughters and one of them wouldn't use them and they were all just hanging around my house until a little girl started DD's school with the same name so we gave them all to her.

WolfFoxHare · 01/02/2025 08:33

I’d just start buying them things you really like. Then if they regift it to, you get a lovely gift.

Glorybox2025 · 01/02/2025 08:31

Definitely stop buying gifts.

Original poster
offfswitch · 01/02/2025 08:29

coo12 · 31/01/2025 23:03

I would rather people didn't bother than regift something they didn't want just for the sake of giving a present. No thought or effort goes into that at all and it can actually be rather hurtful. I once received a toiletry hamper for my birthday that I had given to a relative several months earlier. (I knew it was regifted as I had put it together myself with items that she said she loved before I bought them.) The particular range had also been discontinued not long after I bought it.
Even worse when the sender overlooks checking an item before regifting and it still has the greeting message from the original sender. 😫

I agree it is hurtful.

Especially when it wasn't a random gift that I gave. I try to give gifts that I know people will like or have mentioned they like or would want. When it is regifted back to me, it is annoying and shows thoughtlessness. I would prefer nothing.

OP posts:
Youngheartsalittletogetherness · 01/02/2025 02:13

offfswitch · 31/01/2025 22:12

I have tried to introduce wishlists but people don't want to get something from there because it is free to regift. I do try and give gifts that I know people will like such as coffee for my coffee drinking friend. I got Lavazza because he has that all the time. Still got regifted back to me.

If I get something for Colin that has his name on it, then he can only regift it to another Colin 😂

Or go with something like a cushion,cup, calendar with your face printed on it..then that's the end of gift giving and a fuck you too😀

Mumtobabyhavoc · 01/02/2025 01:17

Give something you love with your name on it. 😉

Swipe left for the next trending thread