Dog seriously ill, due to go to Australia on Sunday

It is REALLY over the top calling another person an utter twat for that comment. The dog will be with its owner, OPs partner, this is absolutely fine. With a random relative it would be different but that’s not the case.

The relative being your partner is quite the drip feed!

That changes everything. The dog will be comfortable with your partner and looked after as normal, not left alone with less known people in their time of need.

In this situation I would probably go, but it's a heartbreaking choice.

I had similar in 2018. I didn't go but my husband did. I followed on a week later after the operation and follow up and we had a vet nurse look in daily to support family who were caring for my dog.

Whatever you decide, the dog didn't do it on purpose.

How old is the dog? I’ve known quite a few people spend a thousands on cancer treatment for their dogs. None have bought a significant amount of time for their pet. If my dog was 12+ with cancer I’d probably make her comfortable and make her last days as lovely as possible. If she was 6 it might go the other way. OP without being heartless you don’t have to bankrupt yourself for a dog who has had a long happy life. And I am devoted to mine.

Go, enjoy yourself! Your dog will be well looked after by their other owner, you don't need to martyr yourself.

My pet insurance paid out for a cancelled holiday last year when my dog became very Poorly and then subsequently passed away, 🥲

OP - why did you refer to your partner and co dog owner as a relative? Why didn’t you say partner?

Is there more going on?

The dog will still be with its owner if your partner is also the owner, you should go! Your partner sounds like a prat. Are they jealous they can’t go?

Urgh I’d probably not go but I’d be absolutely spewing about it.

But this is why I don’t have a dog. I love dogs. But I don’t want my life to be ruled by one.

After your first post I would have said stay, but your dogs other owner is going to be right there through everything, so I would say go, just make sure to give your dog big snuggles before you go.

100% this

It definitely depends on the strength of the bond.. My dog absolutely adores my adult son and I know son would be trustworthy to look after her should the need arise..I fact I joke that she loves him more than me!

I wouldn’t go, cancelled my holiday to NYC for my beloved guinea pig and she’s still with us 2 years later aged 7. I’d never have enjoyed the holiday worrying about her

WTF op!?

So from the dogs perspective she has the love and care from her owner when recovering?

So the only real risk is your feelings, which is up to you to decide.

Im actually cross at your partner for guilt tripping you! Is it possible they’re secretly pleased you’re not going?

I get it’s not ideal timing at all, but the odds are she’s going to be fine! I would say go and have fun, knowing the dog is in safe hands, it’s fellow owners.

I'm going to go the other way and say go. Dogs don't understand death and operations. If the dog was going to be fine with you going away for two weeks, which it sounds like he/she was going to be, then go. To be brutally honest, the dog will either die in the operation or still be about when you get back. Either way, the dog isn't going to know much about it. If your partner is with the dog, then the dog has an owner about? I'm assuming the dog is equally bonded to both of you. Our dog is happy if one of us is about. I don't think it makes much difference to her if we're both there or not... Also what sort of state is the dog going to be in after the operation? Again, I think dogs are either painfree and happy or in pain and not esp happy. If the dog's quality of life is going to be compromised after the operation, then I would really question the op at all. I'm probably going wildly against the mumsnet grain here, but I simply do not understand the logic of keeping animals alive when they're in pain. They don't have the capacity to understand past pain.

Your dog is not being left with a relative! Your dog is being left with your partner (in your words their other owner)! You can still go to Australia because your dog is being left with someone they obviously know and trust.

If my dog was staying with “daddy” then I may well go. I know he could care for her as well as I could. But then I trust him. How do you feel about your ex?
Re the op what will be will be, whether you are there or not.

I wouldn't go , as others have said you wouldn't relax or enjoy .
My dog means the world to me , he would come first , without question .
Shit timing but thems the breaks x

How much of your partner’s position on the dog is related to him not wanting you to go anyway or objecting to have to do the care? It’s a bit rich saying he would cancel when he’s not in the position.

If you were my partner I would be encouraging to go. I can look after the dog. If she survives there’s no reason to cancel the holiday, if she doesn’t you will need a holiday and it would have been cancelled for nothing.

Are there any other underlying reasons why your partner might not be 100% supportive of you going? Why are they not going to Australia?

I think her post said she could get £1000 back which sounds like a drop in the ocean of the costs of the holiday.

@77788r This does indeed make a huge difference..Assuming dog is happy to be left with him?

I think I’d go.

Theres a very strong chance she’ll make it and you’ll find that out 4 days into your holiday if I read that right? So you can then relax and look forward to seeing her when you get back. Does your dog know the relative who’ll be caring for her?

I think it’s unfair of the relative who said that to you; it’s not their choice and I’m sure they know it’s a massive guilt trip if you were otherwise wanting to go.

Have you tried calling the airline and accommodation to see if you can push it all back by a week? That way you’ll know how she’s recovering and be able to enjoy more of the holiday?