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AIBU?

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Original poster

To get annoyed with husband at everything

33 replies

sushiandarollie · 31/01/2025 17:40

Husband (together 8 years) is your stereotypical man, clueless about housework, chores and has no common sense. It’s driving me mad. We have a DC who is 3. I have to tell him everything. Husband came home from shop unaware to check used by dates and bought meat that will be out of date when we need it, pork pies with no use by date (must have been missed off) so no idea when they are out of date. He previously bought a milk with lid come off and so it spilt everywhere.
He plays the fool. Oh I didn’t know about the dates. ‘Oh do I need to put a new bin bag in the bin’. Rubbish overflowing and he claims to not realise.
AiBU to get annoyed so easily over these things. He’s at his wits end with ‘how I keep having a go at him’ I am at my wits end with him

OP posts:
FlameOfGas · 31/01/2025 18:22

And what job does he do? Because I bet he is incredibly competent at that.

Practise makes perfect so he keeps doing the same tasks until he gets it right. Do not accept this weaponised incompetence which is what it is. Have a set day or days for the bin to be emptied. My children when in year 6 emptied the bins in this house.

He is not clueless about housework he sees it as women's work and therefore your responsibility. Not the greatest example to set to your child. Not all men are like this, Dh had a working Dad who didn't do any housework and a SAHM and she taught him to bake, cook, clean and iron. I have two sons who have been raised with this great Father.

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 31/01/2025 18:21

Hard to believe this incompetence is not deliberate at some level. I’d be furious.

rainythursdayontheavenue · 31/01/2025 18:21

Strategic incompetence.

Fuck that for a marriage. He'll never change, he sees himself as above menial tasks therefore they're yours.

Crushgrape · 31/01/2025 18:19

Clueless about housework, chores and no common sense - knows exactly what he needs to do but can’t be bothered to do it because his wife does. Lazy and doesn’t care that wife is running around after him like his mum.

He has no common sense and you have to tell him what to do BECAUSE he just doesn’t want to help out.

ginasevern · 31/01/2025 18:18

Was he like this before you had your DC? If so, why did you reproduce with him? He's unlikely to change in any meaningful way so I think you need to reconsider the relationship.

TomatoSandwiches · 31/01/2025 18:13

He knows he just doesn't care op, he thinks these shit jobs are yours so any attempt at them however crap he does it should be considered an amazing offer of help for you.

And you've given him a child.... for what? What was it about him that made you think " he's the man with genes I think should be replicated. " he sounds worthless.

Springflowersmakeforbetterhours · 31/01/2025 18:02

So you have a toddler and a teen?

Dror · 31/01/2025 17:54

What's the point of the marriage? He's meant to be massively enhancing your life, bringing peace, fun, and an equal functional parent and household member.

If he's choosing to fail, free yourself of him. Theres no excuse for men exploiting women to perform the boring tasks they think are beneath them.