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Original poster

A man called me stupid in front of my daughter

384 replies

Springsunshine28 · 31/01/2025 13:50

As I was exiting the lift with my two-year-old in the pram, another pram went out ahead of us. Since I was backing out, I didn’t realize they were still near the elevator entrance, and I accidentally bumped into the woman with the other pram. I was looking at my phone while maneuvering, but I immediately apologized. However, her husband deliberately said, "She’s on her phone, she’s stupid." My little girl heard it and repeated, "Mum, are you stupid." I was absolutely fuming and really wanted to retaliate. I was so angry and told him that I already apologized and I think you're stupid and rude. I know I should have just ignored it but it really made me so angry.

OP posts:
Original poster
Springsunshine28 · 31/01/2025 14:17

BodenCardiganNot · 31/01/2025 14:12

So first post - you are looking at your phone
Second post - you have two hands on the pram waiting for a phone call
Third post - someone is ringing you.

Which is the correct version?

Yes so If you can imagine, I got my 2 hands on the pram while holding my phone as I was waiting for my gp to call back, then It rang as I was coming out so I was looking at it. It was on vibrate. But regardless, I know I was on the wrong here but I so I apologized. But after apologizing he said that I was stupid.

OP posts:
IPM · 31/01/2025 14:15

Springsunshine28 · 31/01/2025 14:13

I admit I was wrong. But he intentionally wanted me to hear it which is a bot of overkill .

Show quote history

No it's not.

It's his opinion and he was entitled to give it.

Just as you gave him yours 🤷‍♂️

And the GP is a red herring. It doesn't matter who was calling you. You wait until you can safely answer just like you would if you were driving at the time.

theressomanytinafeysicouldbe · 31/01/2025 14:13

IPM · 31/01/2025 14:12

Edited due to the edit LOL

Edited
Show quote history

I edited it as soon as I posted as I misread it

Original poster
Springsunshine28 · 31/01/2025 14:13

LizzoBennett · 31/01/2025 14:06

It's the type of thing that I would have said to my DH out of earshot of the perpetrator. You were being a bit stupid. He shouldn't have said anything in earshot.

I admit I was wrong. But he intentionally wanted me to hear it which is a bot of overkill .

OP posts:
FoxtonFoxton · 31/01/2025 14:12

Who cares? She's two, she won't remember. It's just some stranger you won't meet again. If he thinks you are stupid, does it matter? No. Forget about it. If the worse you ever get called is stupid, you are winning. You should hear some of the stuff I've been called by the general public during my career, just for existing. I find it quite funny.

IPM · 31/01/2025 14:12

theressomanytinafeysicouldbe · 31/01/2025 14:10

Edited it cause I misread, I thought you said your husband called you stupid.

I would have called him out on that, a complete stranger

Edited

Edited due to the edit LOL

BodenCardiganNot · 31/01/2025 14:12

So first post - you are looking at your phone
Second post - you have two hands on the pram waiting for a phone call
Third post - someone is ringing you.

Which is the correct version?

apostrophewoman · 31/01/2025 14:12

Springsunshine28 · 31/01/2025 14:07

Someone's ringing me and I thought it was my gp.

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But you can still wait until you get out of the lift, the phone rings for a while before it goes to voicemail.

spacepies · 31/01/2025 14:11

Mountelephant · 31/01/2025 14:09

I mean, it kinda reads like a drip feed… it’s gone from looking at your phone, to waiting for a phone call from GP, to someone was ringing you 🤷‍♀️

Yeah get off ya phone and look where you're going.
Im sure op would hear it if it rang.

theressomanytinafeysicouldbe · 31/01/2025 14:10

Edited it cause I misread, I thought you said your husband called you stupid.

I would have called him out on that, a complete stranger

xRobin · 31/01/2025 14:10

See this wouldn’t have bothered me in the slightest if you had bumped into me.
However, I have seen far too many Mums with prams crossing a road while looking at their phone, so I hope this was an isolated incident for you.
Your response to your daughter’s question could have been “no darling, Mummy made a mistake and I apologised”.
Ignore the man, it was a small mistake and you said sorry.

Mountelephant · 31/01/2025 14:09

I mean, it kinda reads like a drip feed… it’s gone from looking at your phone, to waiting for a phone call from GP, to someone was ringing you 🤷‍♀️

IPM · 31/01/2025 14:09

Springsunshine28 · 31/01/2025 14:06

I am waiting for a phone call from my gp so I have 2 hands on the pram. But I admit I was wrong so I apologized straight away.

So just accept you were called out on your stupidity and move on 🤷‍♂️

I don't even know why you're bringing your 2 year old into this?

"Mummy are you stupid?"

"Well what mummy did was stupid, so that's why the man said it".

Job done.

spacepies · 31/01/2025 14:08

Id have just walked away tbh.
Something like that wouldn't bring me to a fuming level.
If i was going to say something back i would say something like tell me something i dont know have good day
And kept walking.

Original poster
Springsunshine28 · 31/01/2025 14:07

apostrophewoman · 31/01/2025 13:53

It all sounds a bit childish and tit for tat, but he had a point, given you were exiting a tight space with a pram and another child and were on your phone, so manoeuvring one handed. What could have been so important that you weren't concentrating on what you were doing?

Someone's ringing me and I thought it was my gp.

OP posts:
LizzoBennett · 31/01/2025 14:06

It's the type of thing that I would have said to my DH out of earshot of the perpetrator. You were being a bit stupid. He shouldn't have said anything in earshot.

EmmaMaria · 31/01/2025 14:06

Bearbookagainandagain · 31/01/2025 14:04

He was making a passive aggressive comment directed at OP.
No one bumped into him, he could have just shut up and let his wife managed it.

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Rubbish. He was commenting to his wife. Your interpretation is irrelevant since your weren't there. OP was being stupid - messing with their phone whilst going backwards in a confined space with a pram. I think it was stupid too.

IPM · 31/01/2025 14:06

Bearbookagainandagain · 31/01/2025 13:59

He was a twat, and talking on behalf of his wife - who I'm sure would have been able to speak for herself - is a good sign of that.

Why are you so sure she could speak for herself?

You must be very new to Mumsnet if you haven't read about all the MNetters who are too 'shocked' and 'stunned' to speak up because they're 'riddled with anxiety' and 'don't like confrontation'?

Original poster
Springsunshine28 · 31/01/2025 14:06

I am waiting for a phone call from my gp so I have 2 hands on the pram. But I admit I was wrong so I apologized straight away.

OP posts:
Wordsmithery · 31/01/2025 14:05

You (rudely) didn't pay attention. He (rudely) called you stupid. No need for you to drop to his level by returning the insult. Sets a terrible example for your daughter. Not what you want to hear, I suspect.

Moonnstars · 31/01/2025 14:05

I think he is right to be annoyed. Why were you on your phone while manoeuvring out of the lift? Was it that urgent?

InWalksBarberalla · 31/01/2025 14:05

EmmaMaria · 31/01/2025 14:03

He was not talking on behalf of his wife - he was talking TO his wife.

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I think it's only OK if he said it to his dog.

Bearbookagainandagain · 31/01/2025 14:04

EmmaMaria · 31/01/2025 14:03

He was not talking on behalf of his wife - he was talking TO his wife.

Show quote history

He was making a passive aggressive comment directed at OP.
No one bumped into him, he could have just shut up and let his wife managed it.

IPM · 31/01/2025 14:03

I agree with him to be honest.

It could've been a frail elderly person you banged into by the lift entrance.

Put your phone down until there's a suitable time to look at it.

EmmaMaria · 31/01/2025 14:03

Bearbookagainandagain · 31/01/2025 13:59

He was a twat, and talking on behalf of his wife - who I'm sure would have been able to speak for herself - is a good sign of that.

He was not talking on behalf of his wife - he was talking TO his wife.