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Original poster

A man called me stupid in front of my daughter

384 replies

Springsunshine28 · 31/01/2025 13:50

As I was exiting the lift with my two-year-old in the pram, another pram went out ahead of us. Since I was backing out, I didn’t realize they were still near the elevator entrance, and I accidentally bumped into the woman with the other pram. I was looking at my phone while maneuvering, but I immediately apologized. However, her husband deliberately said, "She’s on her phone, she’s stupid." My little girl heard it and repeated, "Mum, are you stupid." I was absolutely fuming and really wanted to retaliate. I was so angry and told him that I already apologized and I think you're stupid and rude. I know I should have just ignored it but it really made me so angry.

OP posts:
InSearchOfMartin · 31/01/2025 15:31

Topseyt123 · 31/01/2025 15:29

@InSearchOfMartin She wasn't with her husband. It was a random stranger who called her stupid.

Honestly, there was a thread yesterday commenting on the poor levels of reading and comprehension skills on here and there are several glaring cases in point on this thread.

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Aren't there just?! 🙄

Topseyt123 · 31/01/2025 15:31

AliceSpringsEverywhere · 31/01/2025 15:21

It wasn't her husband.

Can people not read?

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No, they can't read, and many are hard of comprehension too.

Fridgetapas · 31/01/2025 15:30

You didn’t deserve to be called stupid and I bet he wouldn’t have said that to another man. I would have said (very loudly) to my daughter “I’m not stupid at all! But that man was very rude to say that!”

InSearchOfMartin · 31/01/2025 15:29

I can certainly read, @AliceSpringsEverywhere. I copied part of the OP's post. "Her husband" means the husband of the woman who she bumped into, and then apologised to. And @Topseyt123 the answer is for you, too. Perhaps I didn't quote enough of the post for readers to get the gist, but they could always check the OP ....

Topseyt123 · 31/01/2025 15:29

InSearchOfMartin · 31/01/2025 15:06

@EmmaMaria her husband deliberately said, "She’s on her phone, she’s stupid."

There is a difference between doing a stupid thing - which we all do at times, no exceptions - and being stupid. He didn't point out she did something stupid, he said she was stupid.

Edited
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@InSearchOfMartin She wasn't with her husband. It was a random stranger who called her stupid.

Honestly, there was a thread yesterday commenting on the poor levels of reading and comprehension skills on here and there are several glaring cases in point on this thread.

ChekhovsMum · 31/01/2025 15:28

All the replies saying ‘yeah well you were being stupid to be fair actually, so you deserved it, smirk smirk’ are completely missing the point. People make mistakes and do ill-judged things in public. That doesn’t give others the right to insult them outright, out loud and especially in front of their children.
This man could have chosen lots of ways to tell you that he wasn’t happy - most people even if they’re really annoyed will respond to a ‘sorry’ with ‘that’s ok’ but sound a bit annoyed, and that’s enough for most people to think about what they’ve done. He could have added ‘but please look where you’re going next time’ but that’s as far as any decent person needs to go. Calling you stupid in front of your daughter showed a total lack of social skills and an aggressive nature which, as pp have said, he wouldn’t have used towards a big burly man. Nor would he have used it towards you, I bet, if you’d been on the arm of a big burly man.
And the posters smirking at you wouldn’t do it if they weren’t behind a screen.

AliceSpringsEverywhere · 31/01/2025 15:21

InSearchOfMartin · 31/01/2025 15:06

@EmmaMaria her husband deliberately said, "She’s on her phone, she’s stupid."

There is a difference between doing a stupid thing - which we all do at times, no exceptions - and being stupid. He didn't point out she did something stupid, he said she was stupid.

Edited
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It wasn't her husband.

Can people not read?

FallOfTheHouseOfUtterlyButterly · 31/01/2025 15:21

slashlover · 31/01/2025 14:51

Why do people always say that? I've seen men be arsey with other men on a regular basis.

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Because its MN and all men are evil and bullies and women are all angels that the men hate...

MumChp · 31/01/2025 15:20

.I was looking at my phone while maneuvering, but I immediately apologized. However, her husband deliberately said, "She’s on her phone, she’s stupid."

-

don't act like this if you aren't prepared to hear the truth.

Fgs why are these phones so important? You were travelling with kids!

AliceSpringsEverywhere · 31/01/2025 15:20

Would a 2 year old know what 'stupid' meant?

I get sick of people looking at their phones when they're walking along and then bumping into me- or me zig zagging across the pavement to avoid them.

Is something on your phone SO vital you look at it every minute of the day?

Don't make carrying your phone obvious- someone will reach out and nick it.

purplecorkheart · 31/01/2025 15:19

Honestly let it go. He is a twat who probably makes himself feel big by making someone else feel small.

Screamingabdabz · 31/01/2025 15:18

Crazycatlady79 · 31/01/2025 14:53

He said you were stupid; you said he was stupid.
Yawn.

This. Jeez. Move on.

FallOfTheHouseOfUtterlyButterly · 31/01/2025 15:18

Carpetmoths · 31/01/2025 14:18

It doesn’t sound like you were in the wrong at all- it’s not like you were texting, totally oblivious. Ignore all the silly buggers telling you it’s totally ok for a man to call you stupid!

Ah yes the evil mens

Topseyt123 · 31/01/2025 15:16

He went way too far and was being an obnoxious twat and you realise that you shouldn't have been looking at your phone while trying to manoeuvre the pushchair out of a tight spot.

Chances are you and he will never encounter each other again so give him no further headspace. Just learn from it, look where you are going and not down at your phone. It would just have taken a few seconds to get out of the lift and then pick up the call.

FallOfTheHouseOfUtterlyButterly · 31/01/2025 15:11

Well it was a stupid thing to do
Exit the lift safely, looking where you are going, then move to the side and answer the phone.

VoodooRajin · 31/01/2025 15:10

Moonnstars · 31/01/2025 14:05

I think he is right to be annoyed. Why were you on your phone while manoeuvring out of the lift? Was it that urgent?

Was what the impatient man doing that urgent? People need to chill, everyone makes mistakes

InSearchOfMartin · 31/01/2025 15:06

EmmaMaria · 31/01/2025 13:54

Why were you looking at your phone whilst trying to move a pram backwards in a confined space? If you had been looking where you were going (backwards) then it wouldn't have happened. And if you object to someone pointing out that this is stupid, why would you just say it back to them. Honestly, I think you were rude to be paying no attention to the people around you and apologising for something doesn't excuse the fact that you were paying no attention.

@EmmaMaria her husband deliberately said, "She’s on her phone, she’s stupid."

There is a difference between doing a stupid thing - which we all do at times, no exceptions - and being stupid. He didn't point out she did something stupid, he said she was stupid.

SoNiceToComeHomeTo · 31/01/2025 15:04

That was a rude comment, but to be honest OP what you did was a bit stupid. Nobody can manoeuvre a pram out of a busy lift and answer the phone at the same time.
You can still reassure DD that no her mummy is not stupid, but you did a stupid thing and people got cross, and another time you'll concentrate on one thing at a time. Could be a valuable lesson for her.

Ameliepoulainandthephotobooth · 31/01/2025 14:57

He called you stupid, you called him stupid. Both in front of the children?

I don’t think that you can complain if you responded in the same manner.

hazelnutvanillalatte · 31/01/2025 14:56

Unacceptable for him to call you stupid, and a bad example for his child. My abusive stepfather used to do things like this in public all the time (not to other men), and was much worse behind closed doors. Don't listen to the socially inept keyboard warriors

Fingeronthebutton · 31/01/2025 14:56

You’ve obviously led a very charmed life if a not worth mentioning comment has you posing on SM.

ItGhoul · 31/01/2025 14:55

I mean, you did do something quite stupid.

heyhopotato · 31/01/2025 14:53

I think the real question is why did they leave the lift and immediately stop dead, knowing someone was coming out behind them.

Crazycatlady79 · 31/01/2025 14:53

He said you were stupid; you said he was stupid.
Yawn.

heyhopotato · 31/01/2025 14:53

Ireallycouldntpossibly · 31/01/2025 14:38

This. I don’t know how old or infirm people ever leave the house anymore. What with electric bikes coming out of nowhere at top speed, and people like you looking at their phone while backing out of a lift.

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Probably why NHS is overwhelmed.