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Original poster

A man called me stupid in front of my daughter

384 replies

Springsunshine28 · 31/01/2025 13:50

As I was exiting the lift with my two-year-old in the pram, another pram went out ahead of us. Since I was backing out, I didn’t realize they were still near the elevator entrance, and I accidentally bumped into the woman with the other pram. I was looking at my phone while maneuvering, but I immediately apologized. However, her husband deliberately said, "She’s on her phone, she’s stupid." My little girl heard it and repeated, "Mum, are you stupid." I was absolutely fuming and really wanted to retaliate. I was so angry and told him that I already apologized and I think you're stupid and rude. I know I should have just ignored it but it really made me so angry.

OP posts:
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JandamiHash · 10/02/2025 13:52

T1Dmama · 10/02/2025 08:53

So when they apologise to you, do you insult them?
since OP was walking backwards I assume she bumped into them rather than hitting them with the pram?

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People like @fitzwilliamdarcy clearly haven’t read the thread properly and have been berating the poor OP for something she hasn’t even done

T1Dmama · 10/02/2025 08:54

I don’t think I’ve ever been bumped into or bumped into anyone with a pram/scooter etc…. I clearly haven’t lived as some of you claim to be ‘always’ being bumped into….

T1Dmama · 10/02/2025 08:53

fitzwilliamdarcy · 09/02/2025 13:22

Weird how many people on here seem to think a woman bashing a man with her pram and then calling him stupid and rude is somehow an act of feminism.

I’ve been bashed into so many times by people with prams, scooters etc because they’re not looking where they’re going. It drives me mad. But now I shall rejoice in it knowing that it’s dismantling the patriarchy.

So when they apologise to you, do you insult them?
since OP was walking backwards I assume she bumped into them rather than hitting them with the pram?

JandamiHash · 09/02/2025 16:09

fitzwilliamdarcy · 09/02/2025 13:22

Weird how many people on here seem to think a woman bashing a man with her pram and then calling him stupid and rude is somehow an act of feminism.

I’ve been bashed into so many times by people with prams, scooters etc because they’re not looking where they’re going. It drives me mad. But now I shall rejoice in it knowing that it’s dismantling the patriarchy.

Who bashed into a man with a pram?! Or said it was a feminist act?

Teateaandmoretea · 09/02/2025 15:54

fitzwilliamdarcy · 09/02/2025 13:22

Weird how many people on here seem to think a woman bashing a man with her pram and then calling him stupid and rude is somehow an act of feminism.

I’ve been bashed into so many times by people with prams, scooters etc because they’re not looking where they’re going. It drives me mad. But now I shall rejoice in it knowing that it’s dismantling the patriarchy.

Out there in the real world where there are loads of people everywhere we all get ‘bashed’ all the time. Generally unless we are arseholes we just accept the apology 👍🏻

If the cap fits ❤️

fitzwilliamdarcy · 09/02/2025 13:22

Weird how many people on here seem to think a woman bashing a man with her pram and then calling him stupid and rude is somehow an act of feminism.

I’ve been bashed into so many times by people with prams, scooters etc because they’re not looking where they’re going. It drives me mad. But now I shall rejoice in it knowing that it’s dismantling the patriarchy.

T1Dmama · 09/02/2025 13:03

I would’ve addressed my daughter and simply said to her
’no darling it’s VERY rude to call people stupid!’.. that man was VERY RUDE!
then gone about my business..
ignoring him and correcting your child would’ve been the better way to role model to your DD

broney · 05/02/2025 10:28

Put you damn phone away for five minutes! Concentrate on your daughter.
I would have reacted, told you to "Look where you're going" but I would NOT have called you names.

TheFormidableMrsC · 02/02/2025 18:00

rugbyman79 · 02/02/2025 12:43

so you were on your phone, backing up and bumped into someone. likely hurting them

he was rude, but not wrong

Absolutely zero excuse for speaking to anybody like that when they immediately apologise. Vile man behaviour.

SleepyHippy3 · 02/02/2025 12:56

rugbyman79 · 02/02/2025 12:43

so you were on your phone, backing up and bumped into someone. likely hurting them

he was rude, but not wrong

Clearly no one was hurt. She apologised immediately and yet he still called her stupid whilst with her daughter. Why wouldn’t you accept the apology like a mature and normally socialised grown adult?

rugbyman79 · 02/02/2025 12:43

so you were on your phone, backing up and bumped into someone. likely hurting them

he was rude, but not wrong

Treesandsheepeverywhere · 01/02/2025 23:43

You know you were wrong and admitted it.
You're more worried about him saying it in front of your daughter, but like many have said, explain to her and move on.

He might not have meant to say it as loud,
They might have had a bad day/bad news,
She might have been bumped into for the 10th time ,
So many what ifs.

We do things in the heat of the moment that we regret later, imagine this was the case with him.

You reacted in a way you regret, he might regret it too.

Good people do/say bad things sometimes, not an excuse but we're all human.

Try not to take it personally as he'd have said the same if it was someone else.

Lastly, please be alert around lifts as it can be dangerous, especially with young kids, buggies etc.

GirlWithTheRedScarf · 01/02/2025 23:40

You can’t control the reactions of other people sadly. Regardless of the situation, he sounds like an unreasonable man. People are impatient and he may have had a call from his own gp that same day with some bad news which had put him in a miserable mood. You apologised. It’s a reflection on them, not you. Go about your day with your head held high and explain to DD that sometimes people can be unkind, and others can be assholes :-)

Lighteningstrikes · 01/02/2025 23:35

You apologised and he was very rude.

JandamiHash · 01/02/2025 23:29

SleepyHippy3 · 01/02/2025 23:26

But he said it in front of OP. That comment was clearly intended for her.

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Went through all this last night with that poster. I swear they said “OP shouldn’t have been eavesdropping” 😂😂😂

JandamiHash · 01/02/2025 23:29

FallOfTheHouseOfUtterlyButterly · 01/02/2025 23:23

Or he was reassuring his wife it wasn't her fault...

It wasn't said TO her.

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Unless his wife only had a poo where her brain should be, why would he need to do this? And wouldn’t he say “That wasn’t your fault” if it was the case. Christ I’d hate to be such a sap I’d need a man’s validation over every minor mishap

And we’ve been through this - slagging off someone whilst standing next to them is the same as slagging them off to their face. The rule is not “Well I wasn’t talking to YOU, eavesdropper”

SleepyHippy3 · 01/02/2025 23:26

FallOfTheHouseOfUtterlyButterly · 01/02/2025 23:23

Or he was reassuring his wife it wasn't her fault...

It wasn't said TO her.

Show quote history

But he said it in front of OP. That comment was clearly intended for her.

FallOfTheHouseOfUtterlyButterly · 01/02/2025 23:23

SleepyHippy3 · 01/02/2025 23:22

The OP and her daughter were right there, in front of him. Clearly, he deliberately said it so that OP could clearly hear it.

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Or he was reassuring his wife it wasn't her fault...

It wasn't said TO her.

SleepyHippy3 · 01/02/2025 23:22

FallOfTheHouseOfUtterlyButterly · 01/02/2025 23:00

He didn't speak to her though. He spoke to his wife

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The OP and her daughter were right there, in front of him. Clearly, he deliberately said it so that OP could clearly hear it.

SleepyHippy3 · 01/02/2025 23:14

StrikeAlways · 01/02/2025 23:02

And the OPs behaviour wasn’t?

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Of course she shouldn’t have, but she apologised when it happened but still got called stupid, in front oh her kid, and she retaliated. No one should be telling someone they are stupid.

LikeWhoUsesTypewritersAnyway · 01/02/2025 23:03

StrikeAlways · 01/02/2025 23:02

And the OPs behaviour wasn’t?

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Exactly this. The OP hasn't come out of this covered in glory has she? Wink

!

StrikeAlways · 01/02/2025 23:02

SleepyHippy3 · 01/02/2025 20:01

The bloke was a grown up adult. He shouldn’t have spoken to another person like that. What an immature way to react. It’s such a rude way to behave.

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And the OPs behaviour wasn’t?

FallOfTheHouseOfUtterlyButterly · 01/02/2025 23:00

SleepyHippy3 · 01/02/2025 20:01

The bloke was a grown up adult. He shouldn’t have spoken to another person like that. What an immature way to react. It’s such a rude way to behave.

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He didn't speak to her though. He spoke to his wife

VeneziaJ · 01/02/2025 20:05

I disagree with most on here. Calling someone stupid in front of their young child is NOT acceptable and as you immediately apologised it was completely unnecessary and rude! Yes you made a mistake (minor!) but there was no need for him to be rude and disrespectful

JandamiHash · 01/02/2025 20:02

DeadSpace3 · 01/02/2025 19:33

If you were holding your phone while pushing/pulling a pram out of a lift then I don't have much sympathy TBH. In fact I would have probably said something similar 😂

Edited

Even if OP had apologised?