Please or to access all these features

AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To not want to visit this couple- both heavy smokers

30 replies

bagpuss90 · 31/01/2025 13:19

We have been invited to our friends house for dinner. I really like them both - but they are both heavy smokers. They even smoke at the dinner table. When I leave there - well I stink . My clothes, my hair- I find it really quite revolting. I have to shower and wash my hair when I get home. Im also mildly asthmatic- I end up wheezy and tight chested . I want to suggest we meet up in a pub or restaurant- so it won’t be an issue. It’s their house - so their rules and also their bodies But I don’t want it inflicted on me.My DP thinks I should suck it up as it’s only for a cpl hours.

OP posts:
jeaux90 · 31/01/2025 13:34

Suggest dinner out, split bill.

PinkyFlamingo · 31/01/2025 13:33

Why on earth should you "suck it up"! Just be honest.

Nina1013 · 31/01/2025 13:31

I wouldn’t go to anyone’s house who smokes indoors, for anything let alone for dinner.

Fluff111 · 31/01/2025 13:31

Just say you dislike smoking and suggest meeting in a pub or restaurant. I was in a pub last year and a good friend had a table on the patio and was smoking. She asked me and my partner to join her. I actually said no and stayed inside the bar as even outside you still go home stinking of smoke. Just politely decline and say it’s because of the smoking.

Rainbow450 · 31/01/2025 13:27

I wouldn't go, as smoke gives me a migraine. However as it's their house you can't say anything.

Your suggestion of a pub/restaurant is a great shout and you can say that you don't want your friend to go to the trouble of cooking etc - spin it as a treat for her.