Two thirds of adults in England are obese or overweight. It would make as much sense to ask what is different about the other one third.

I’m 4 foot 10 and have a constant battle with my weight.
I like to be slim because I don’t carry weight well but I have to be very restrictive with what I eat.

My ideal weight is 7 and a half stone and I was for several years but recently I’ve gained weight and I’m only 9 and a half stone but that’s very overweight for me.

I have been trying to lose weight and been doing dry January and swimming 5 times a week for an hour, the weight is coming off but it is depressing to know that if I want to be a healthy weight that I can rarely drink alcohol or have any treats or takeaways and have to drastically reduce my calorie intake.

My biggest weakness is alcohol, I like a couple of glasses of wine or a drink at the weekend, since cutting it out completely I have lost 10lb this month.

It is depressing having to be so strict with my diet but I’d choose being a healthy weight over food any day. I went up to 10 stone after a holiday and I felt unfit and lost all confidence, my feet hurt because they are tiny and not designed to carry so much extra weight and I struggled to buy clothes because I usually fit children’s clothes.

My best friend is only a few inches taller but is very overweight, she complains about it constantly and it was frustrating me because she knows what to do in order to lose it. I understand exactly what it’s like to struggle with weight and I’d never judge her for her size, I just don’t see the point in complaining about something only you have the power to change.
It was because of this that I made my own changes, I thought it was hypocritical of me to be thinking like that but then not doing anything about my own weight!

My target weight is now 8 stone but my BMI says I can be 6 stone and still in the healthy range, if I was 3 inches taller I’d be classed as severely underweight if I dropped under 7 and a half stone, I don’t think people realise how hard it is for us small people!

Actually the airport/meal deal as per PP above, is a good example.

When I'm travelling through airports I have a flat white and a boiled egg/spinach pot from Pret. I carry dark chocolate in my handbag for a treat.

I'm not bothered about dinner as I like to sleep early and can't bear feeling full at bedtime.

I take my own lunch to work, today it was roast veg and chicken breast.

So I think it is often a cumulative thing. It's almost always making the better food choice.

It's being prepared. I always have nuts in my office drawer. I make the effort to weigh out my oats and flax for breakfast.

I don't think about food really or crave it other than when I feel hungry. I know that biscuits make my teeth feel grimy and sick so I'm not tempted by those when I'm peckish.

I am lucky though. I can afford the good ingredients. I know how to cook (despite being raised on findus crispy pancakes and frey bentos pies), I learnt how to exercise and was able to afford personal training sessions to teach me what to do. Also I have private healthcare so when I'm injured from exercise I can access a consultant and physio with speed.

How do you know slim people aren’t battling constant food noise too? Judgy much? I know I’d be a pudding if I gave into every craving so I work hard not to. DH prioritises treats over being slim.

^ This. Kate Moss was absolutely crucified for saying that 'nothing tastes as good as skinny feels' because it was seen as encouraging anorexia, particularly in the modelling world but I kind of get what she means. I used to have a very active outdoor job and never had to think about what I ate but now as a 50 something menopausal women it's much easier to put on weight. I feel hungry at times but so what, I have a coffee and think about the lovely tea that I have planned for the evening.

But for others I think there are medical or psychological reasons for being overweight and those are far harder to unpick or solve.

I think it is a really interesting question as to where that food noise comes from. I'm a bit overweight and have the food noise all the time it takes a huge amount of restraint not to eat constantly.
What causes the food noise?
And why do some people be unable to ignore it and some not?

This.

You've misunderstood the question. We all know that people who over eat are overweight. The question is why do some people find it normal/easy/possible to not over eat?

They're not 'doing' anything 'right'. There are simply a different set of complex, interrelated factors at play compared with some who has obesity and hence different outcomes.

It’s simple. Those who aren’t overweight don’t over eat.

We could also ask why were most people of a normal weight in the (recent) past?

• More active - not just deliberately partaking in actual physical exercise, but on a day-to-day level, walking rather than driving, even having to go out to (multiple) shops to get groceries rather than having them delivered. Jobs/housework were more active.

• Less junk food available and less emphasis on eating for pleasure, rather than fuel

• More personal responsibility

So the shift in population lifestyle is probably a big cause and it's down to individuals to remedy it. Which is trickier.

I’ve no doubt that hormones and genetics play a part, but I also refuse to believe that hormones and genetics have radically altered in the last 50 years! At primary, there was usually one overweight kid in the school. Now there are often several in each class.
The issues:-
The marketing and variety of all food 24/7 - particularly fast food/UPFs
Social change - more families where both parents work so harder to prepare food from scratch. Kids outside to play less etc
If you come from an overweight family you see overweight as the norm and pick up the same bad habits re portion size etc
A general lack of taking responsibility for you and your family’s diet. It takes time and effort to teach your kids good habits.
And I speak as someone who has had weight struggles and loves food. The vast majority of people lose weight by eating healthily, plus smaller portions of normal food. I know so many people who have meal replacements etc and the weight always goes back on. It’s about re educating eating habits and learning a bit of willpower. Preferable to injecting yourself with stuff for the rest of your life. Or ending up with type 2 diabetes and arthritic joints due to carrying all the excess weight for years. That’s the best incentive for will power for me.

Evolution hasn't caught up, we're supposed to have periods where we effectively water fast for a few days. Then eat in times of plenty. Those whose ancestors had access to food are generally taller and leaner and the rest of us proletarian build whose ancestors have survived famine are primed to lay down fat. Including me :)

I think this is actually a really complicated question with no easy answer.

One thing I've realised is how healthier, low calorie choices equate to so much more food, which also take a lot longer to eat.

Compare the amount of food in a plate of vegetables/leafy salad compared to a portion of chips to the same calorie value. It's significantly more and will take you much longer to eat. Same with fruit in comparison to cake or chocolate. Healthy choices reduce the risk of over-eating whether it's due to calorie density or portion size.

But we all know that and yet plenty of people do not make the healthier choice. There's no moral superiority involved. There are reasons. I suspect it's a different reason (or complicated combination of) for individual people.

For some it may be deeply psychological. For others it may be that what started as a habit has become an addiction because we're now learning how UPFs are deliberately produced with a salt/sugar balance to stimulate the feel good centres in the brain and stimulate desire for more. Others are facing food poverty and can only ensure they/their family are fed by choosing low-cost UPFs. The solution is not a sugar tax, which simply makes it harder for people in food poverty.

First thing to point out is that the "other third" aren't automatically eating healthily or living healthy lifestyles. Being overweight is not the only driver of poor health. You can be a healthy weight but eat appalling food, you can be underweight, you can have an eating disorder.

I would like to see some actual statistics that go deeper into the backgrounds and lifestyles of people of every weight. My personal feeling is that a lot of bad eating habits are primarily caused by a combination of stress and relative poverty. Give people the resources they need to make good choices and often they will. People need the money and the time to live a healthy lifestyle.

Just as the rich like to think they are rich because they worked hard and therefore the poor are only poor because they don't work hard, people who are not obese like to think it's all down to their own willpower.

This is so fascinating to me as someone currently on Mounjaro, because I didn't realise I could feel like this. Someone else upthread mentioned how they 'just stop when they feel full' - I don't get that, I have to be physically uncomfortable before I notice I'm full. Same when people say they're upset or not well or stressed and therefore can't eat - my brain's answer to most things is and has always been to eat something.

It's been so interesting to experience life where I'm not thinking about food until I'm actually hungry, to feel full much more quickly etc. I wouldn't even have said I had a 'problem' before - it wasn't like I was consciously thinking of my life as ruled by eating - but having experienced what it's like without that requirement I do think some people are just wired differently (or made that way - for me there are a number of reasons why I think food had become such a compulsive thing, both health conditions and upbringing and parental relationships with food). I'm very envious of people who have this very freeing lack of food noise as their default.

This stat makes no sense

I was 9st -BMI 21 until 35

I am now 11st BMI 23

in a few years i could be overweight- BMI 25

in a few years after that I may be obese - BMi 30

34 year old me didn’t know the secret. She was just skinny 🤷🏼‍♀️

I think this plays a role. As a child, I was expected to eat what I was given, even if the portion was too big or I wasn't hungry.

I find it interesting that when my mother cares for my kids, she is very determined that they should eat a "good" dinner... to the extent of actually feeding them even though both, including the toddler, are very able to feed themselves. My older one does need a big of encouragement as he isn't very interested in food, so will leave his dinner and then ask for unhealthy snacks later on. But the younger one has a perfectly good appetite and, if she's not eating, it's because she's had enough or isn't very hungry. And yet my mother's approach is always "just a little bit more". Whereas I put food in front of the DC and remove it 20 minutes later and that's that (and if the older one hasn't eaten, there's toast and fruit later on but that's all).

I run a lot to deal with my poor mental health 😅I find it quite hard to even keep the weight on when I’m so active and I’m already at the lower end of a healthy bmi

I'm just in the obese category. It's because I have Binge Eating Disorder. I was bulimic and very slim when younger.
There is no treatment available because I am autistic and they won't do CBT on autistic people here.

I watched a programme about foetal development and the point was made that there are off and on ‘ switches’ for food that are laid down early on in the embryo. One was the “ I am full” switch and another was the sweet/ savoury switch. IIRC observations of children eating fell into two camps — no more I’m full and there’s more food I’ll eat it.

Age is rarely if ever mentioned on these threads or in real life and IME it makes a HUGE difference. How many of us were effortless size 8-10s into our mid 20s? Those on jabs tell me they eat whatever they want whenever they want, just not much of it. How liberating! The 'French women don't get fat' principle. A little of what you fancy...

Since the majority who take weight loss medication successfully lose weight, it suggests that it's more about hormones and chemistry than being greedy and lazy...

I think I need to move 🤣

I think I am one of the people you are referring to here. I have never dieted, I do enjoy food and alcohol, and I really like exercising and being outdoors. I find it helps me clear my mind. Thinking about it, there is an 'everything in moderation' ethos at home. It's genuinely not something I think about unless I'm asked, which happens sometimes when people are curious as to how I returned to my pre baby weight. The answer is that I did a huge amount of pram walks and ate when I was hungry. Breast feeding might have helped a bit too. I don't recognise the concept of 'food noise'. I just don't really think about food unless I'm hungry, and I don't consider it a 'treat' to eat. I read a saying once, 'Do not reward yourself with food, you are not a dog' and it stuck with me. I try to reward myself in other ways, like having a bath or going for a walk in the woods.

Interestingly, I walk my kids to and from school, which is about a 20 minute walk each way, twice a day. I can see how a generational pattern might develop, as they both really like being on their scooter/bike, and they both eat whatever we eat, which tends to be healthy and home cooked meals.

All that said, I think I have massively benefitted from genetics and a supportive partner, who does his share of the domestic work as well as pulling in a good income, which has enabled me to go part time, and I am also able to work from home 2 days a week which helps with logistics. I'm not working night shifts or constantly rushing around trying to make a train to get to the nursery, for example. I wouldn't dream of judging anyone for their weight as I think it is a complicated and nuanced issue, and I sympathise with anyone struggling with their weight, whether overweight or underweight.

ETA I'm a size 6-8, 5ft 5, about 52kg (I think, I don't have scales)

This is based off people's BMI which we all know isn't a good way of measuring.

You could have a man who is 18 stone, all abs & muscles and he would be classed as obese....

I weigh 13 stone 11 & I'm 5ft 4, size 14 but have GG boobs and I'm classed as obese. It's all a bit mad...

Once the weight is on it’s hard to get off. I was obese in my teens (undiagnosed pcos) and it was very hard work getting it off.

Been slim for years now and eat a balanced diet but it’s hard to gain weight as I’d need to be eating over 1800 calories daily to gain any.

An obese person may well eat the same as me but will maintain the same weight at 1800 calories. They’d need to be on a calorie deficit to lose a significant amount. One thing that keeps the weight off me is not eating takeaways. A few takeaways and my weight will easily creep up.